


We All Need Someone To Stay

by sterekhale



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Canon Compliant, Derek Hale is a Softie, First Time Bottoming, Fluff, Getting Together, Getting to Know Each Other, M/M, Minor Original Character(s), Pack Family, Post-Canon, Stiles is kind of an ass, this is a quarantine fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:22:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 46,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24075121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sterekhale/pseuds/sterekhale
Summary: It was supposed to be a simple three-day trip down to Mexico and back. A favor for Scott. He was going alone – could’ve easily handled it alone – but after his Jeep broke down an hour into the trip, Derek showed up and decided to tag along. The world went to shit by the time they got back to California and their recent travel forced them into quarantine for fourteen days. In Derek’s one bedroom apartment. Together.They could survive two weeks.Probably.
Relationships: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 89
Kudos: 620





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Yes this is a COVID-19 quarantine fic, I guess that’s what happens when I’ve been in isolation for 7 weeks. But the virus is really not talked about it too much after the first part…This ended up way longer than I intended.
> 
> I also had to make an “end” for this whole situation, by no means am I implying a real life date. Anything to do with the virus ending or what not, is for the purposes of this story.
> 
> Fic title taken from Someone to Stay by Vancouver Sleep Clinic.

He should’ve known declaring 2020 _his year_ on New Year’s Eve was jinxing it. Aside from the bat-shit crazy world problems going on, his personal life crashed and burned. Because of which he found himself moving back in with his dad at twenty-six years old.

It wasn’t all bad. He liked his dad’s girlfriend. His dad had redone his room so it wasn’t a relic from his teenage years. He’d save rent money for a while which would be a relief. And not living alone in his and Becca’s shitty apartment would be another bonus.

His personal life really hadn’t all turned to shit. He still had his friends. Mostly. The ones that counted at least. As well as his pride. He’d found out before he got in too deep with her.

Pushing it from his mind, he opened his suitcase and unpacked it into the dresser.

His dad appeared in the doorway. “How’s it going?”

“I’m a twenty-six-year-old man who just found out his girlfriend of two years was cheating on him with her co-worker for half their relationship and had to move back in with his dad –” Stiles flashed him a fake smile – “I’m great.”

“I’m sorry, I can’t imagine what you’re going through right now.”

“I just need some time, get back on my feet, find a place of my own.”

“Things’ll get better, look at me, I never thought I’d find love after your mom but thirteen years later I met Marie,” his dad said with a smile.

“Yeah, I know.”

Stiles appreciated him trying to help. The problem was that he wasn’t even that heartbroken over losing Becca. That was more concerning than anything else.

“Marie’s picking up dinner on her way home, we’re having your favorite.”

“Thanks dad.” Stiles shoved the empty suitcase under his bed. “I appreciate you letting me move back in.”

“Anytime, you know that. It’ll be nice having you around more.”

*

After dinner, he dropped by Scott’s house. It’d been a while since he saw them. By a while he meant two weeks, which was a long time for them. The small cobblestone house sat just outside of Beacon Hills where the lawns were bigger and the neighborhoods were quieter. In the summer, Scott’s front gardens were home to dozens of brightly colored flowers and the big oak tree out front was a brilliant green. Now, it was all just bare branches as winter rolled into spring.

As much as he hated it a flare of jealously rose in his throat. Don’t get him wrong, he was extremely happy for his best friend. Underneath all that happiness though, there was a little voice saying _when’s my turn_?

He didn’t knock on the door, just walked in.

“Honey, I’m home!” Stiles sung out, toeing off his shoes.

“We’re in the kitchen,” Scott said.

Scott was standing at the counter, Olivia swaddled in his arms, pouring hot water from a kettle into a mug.

“Where’s Tess?” Stiles asked, plopping down at the kitchen table. 

Scott and Malia had lasted just a little longer than him and Lydia. Shortly into his second year at UC Davis though, Scott met Tessa and fell head over heels in love. More biblical than him and Allison. Seven years later, here they were; a house, a giant diamond ring, and a baby. Accidental, but not at all unwelcome.

“She just had her first shift back at the hospital since giving birth, she should be home anytime.”

Scott handed Olivia to Stiles. Even though he’d been around her many times since her birth, Stiles still awkwardly held the baby in his arms. He couldn’t decide whether he liked it or not, holding babies and being responsible for another’s life.

“She’s a baby, not a bomb,” Scott said.

“Isn’t she just like a little ticking time bomb for pee, shit, and puke?”

Scott laughed. “You can’t swear in front of a baby!”

“She’s two months old. I don’t think she’ll remember her uncle Stiles saying shit.” He looked down at Olivia, her skin a beautiful shade of deep umber and her big brown eyes peering up at him. Her father’s eyes. “Will you remember? Will you remember me saying shit?” Stiles cooed.

“Do I hear Stiles swearing in front of my daughter?” Tess called out as she came in the house. Her voice teasing.

“Damn werewolf hearing,” Stiles muttered.

Olivia smiled up at him and his heart swooped in his chest. She was kind of cute. When she wasn’t crying or pooping or spitting up on him. Which had happened plenty of times already.

Tess’ arms were full of toilet paper and diapers as she came in the kitchen.

“Oh god, not you too,” Scott groaned.

“I got the last toilet paper package! What if the stores don’t get any more by the time we run out? We go through a ton of it.” Tess set them down on the floor. “It’s crazy out there.” She pulled the elastic out of her hair, freeing her tightly coiled curls.

“Yeah, could you imagine if they knew about all the supernatural stuff that went on when we were in high school?” Stiles laughed. “We’d never find toilet paper.”

Somehow the supernatural stuff had calmed down over the years. Probably whatever it was that Deaton did to the Nemeton to suppress its supernatural magnet vibes. The pack was still together. They protected others from hunters. Tessa had helped too until she got pregnant. But things like Nogitsunes and Wild Hunts didn’t really happen anymore. Their biggest problems were usually Liam losing control of his anger or deciding as a group what to do for their annual pack trip.

“Hi sweetie,” Tess whispered and bent over, kissing Olivia’s forehead.

“Hi honey,” Stiles said.

Tess looked up at him. “How’re you doing?” Her face softened.

“Well I’m moved back in with my dad, and I’m starting over in the age of dating apps and a freakin’ pandemic.”

“You’ll find the one, you just have to give it time.” Tess patted him on the shoulder.

He shifted Olivia in his arms, she had fallen asleep.

“You sound like an engaged person,” he said.

Tess smirked, putting away groceries in the fridge.

“What about Brian? He was nice, maybe you could pick things back up with him?” Scott said. “I liked him.”

Stiles scrunched up his nose. “Brian as a friend is way more fun than Brian as a boyfriend. Plus, now we’re partnered at work so that would make things a little awkward if we broke up again.”

“Oh! Callie from work is newly single too, what if I introduce you two?” Tess asked.

“Callie, the girl who thought her boyfriend was cheating on her because of a dream she had?”

“Alright, you look past the minor paranoia and she’s a good person.” Tess shrugged. “Plus, can you really be that picky? You’re getting on in age. Soon you’ll be a wrinkly old man needing that little blue pill.” She smirked.

From the first introduction, him and Tess got along. They were both assholes with the same sense of humor. It worked out great, until it came back to bite him in the ass.

“Ha-ha,” he said dryly. “My back up plan was Scott, but he knocked up some slut from San Francisco.”

“She sounds terrible,” Tess said.

“She's the worst.”

“I don’t know if I approve of this friendship,” Scott said. Not for the first time over seven years.

Olivia stirred in his arms and let out a loud wail. He held out his arms.

“I told you she was a bomb!”

Tess laughed and took Olivia from his arms. “She’s probably just hungry, I’ll be back.”

“So, what did you have to talk to me about?” Stiles asked.

Scott put down his mug. “I need more mountain ash, but they’re behind on deliveries because of the virus. It’d be good to stock up before things start to shutdown, who knows how long it’ll be until things are back to normal. Obviously, I can’t go and get it myself. But I can pay you.”

“You don’t have to pay me, where do I have to go?”

“It’s a store just across the border.”

“Mexico?”

“Yeah, is that alright?”

“Sure,” Stiles shrugged. “Will be a nice little road trip.”

Scott fidgeted with his mug. “Derek’s in town again.”

“Okay.”

Stiles wasn’t sure why Scott was telling him that. Recently when Scott talked to Stiles about Derek it was like there was something he wasn’t saying. Like he was walking on glass around Stiles when it came to Derek.

“Just thought you’d might want to know.” Scott took a sip of his tea.

*

The Jeep was old. Very, very old and Stiles knew he’d have to get a new car soon. Honestly though, he thought he’d make it more than an hour south before it crapped out on him. A tow truck couldn’t get to him for another couple of hours and his dad was working.

He dialed Scott.

“Hey what’s up?”

“The Jeep broke down, I’m an hour south of Beacon Hills and I can’t get a tow truck until tonight. My dad’s stuck at work.”

“Oh man, I have a surgery in half an hour.”

“Is Tess working?”

“Yeah until five.”

“Shit… I’m basically stuck here then until I can get this tow truck.”

“Call Derek.”

“I don’t want to.”

“Hasn’t it been long enough for your weird resentment towards Derek to go away?”

“I don’t resent him.”

He really didn’t. At one point, he almost liked Derek too much, but when Scott was the only one that got calls and visits from him, it became clear that Stiles didn’t matter.

“Just call him, I’m sure he can pick you up. The tow truck can bring your Jeep later.”

“Fine,” Stiles sighed. “Good luck with your surgery, don’t kill the dog.”

“It’s a cat,” Scott said. “And that’s never funny, I don’t know why you and Tess both think that’s a funny thing to say to me.”

“My mom died when I was ten, I don’t know what Tess’ excuse is.”

“Call Derek, I’ll talk to you later.”

The line went dead and Stiles felt an urge to throw his phone across the parking lot. Instead he took a deep breath and phoned Derek.

Why he bothered to put Derek’s number into every new phone he got was beyond him. It wasn’t like they’d called or texted. Not once since Stiles’ left for school eight years ago. They didn’t have anything to talk about once the supernatural stuff had calmed down.

“Stiles?” Derek’s voice was confused, hesitant. “Is Scott okay?”

Stiles scoffed. “Scott’s fine, I can’t call you?”

“You never call.”

“I –” Stiles gritted his teeth together – “I’m stuck at a rest stop about an hour south of Beacon Hills.”

“Okay.”

Stiles leaned his forehead on the Jeep window. “Can you come get me?”

“Me?”

“Yes you, for god’s sake Derek. Scott said you’re in town.”

“I am. Why can’t Scott get you?”

“He’s in surgery, Tessa’s at work, my dad’s at work, the tow truck can’t even get here until later tonight. I’ve literally exhausted all my options before calling you. Can you pick me up or not?”

“Yeah. I’m on my way.” Derek sounded amused. As if he had been fucking with Stiles. The sound of a car door shutting could be heard through the phone. “Send me the location.”

Stiles couldn’t help the sarcastic comment that slipped out. “Do you know how to map it? You need an app, which means you have to –”

“I know how to use Google Maps… do you still want the pick up?”

“Yes,” Stiles said quietly.

“Then shut up and send me the location.” Derek hung up before Stiles could retort.

He sent the location to Derek and went into the rest stop, he got some hash browns and a breakfast burrito, sitting down at the table. Watched the news scroll through the latest on the virus.

Countries around the world were shutting down, but the States was resisting. However, California was starting to fall in line with other countries, non-essential businesses were closing. He knew it was serious and figured he only had a couple more weeks before going to Mexico wasn’t an option.

He was an essential worker, he’d be there alongside his dad. It made him nervous, with his dad’s age and Marie’s recent diagnosis of kidney disease. Thankfully, the majority of other people in his life couldn’t get sick.

Just over an hour later, Derek’s SUV pulled into the parking lot. Stiles jumped up and threw out his trash, walking outside into the warm sun.

Derek got out of his car and joined Stiles at his Jeep.

It’d been roughly eight months since he last saw or spoke to Derek. He came around for the pack Christmas dinner but Stiles had to work. New deputy got the shifts no one else wanted, even when his dad was sheriff.

He thought maybe it’d be awkward. Seeing Derek after what happened the last time they were together. But it wasn’t. Derek was the same as he always was. As if no time had passed.

“What’s wrong with it?” Derek asked.

“I don’t know, just started having problems on the highway so I pulled in here and now it won’t start.”

Derek opened the hood and looked in. “There’s more duct tape than original parts in here.”

“Yeah, I think it’s time for a new car.” Stiles grabbed out his backpack and baseball bat from the backseat.

“Why do you have a bat?”

Since becoming a deputy, he didn’t need the bat anymore. The looks the pack gave him when he showed them his new gun were ones of apprehension and fear. So far though, he hadn’t shot anyone.

“Can’t cross the border with a gun,” Stiles said.

“You were going to Mexico?”

“Yeah, Scott needed me to pick up a shipment of mountain ash before all the lockdowns go in place.”

Derek shut the hood of his Jeep. “We better get on the road if we want to hit the border before dark.”

“Woah, I just need a ride back to Beacon Hills. I’ll take Scott’s car tomorrow.”

“It’s not safe for you to go alone to Mexico.”

“I’ll be fine, I’m a cop now.”

“You’re a human.” Derek got in his car. “Who brought a bat for defense.” He shut the door as if that was the end of the discussion.

Stiles sighed. He threw his backpack and bat in the backseat and got in the passenger seat.

“Fine, whatever, we can go to Mexico.” Stiles texted Scott the development. “What are you doing back in Beacon Hills anyways?”

These days, Derek came back to Beacon Hills less and less. Usually Stiles found out that Derek had been in town days after he was already gone again. There were times when Stiles thought about calling him. See if Derek was in town and wanted to hang out but he always chickened out at the last second.

He’d heard from Marie that Derek was back in town over a month ago, Derek came into the store she worked at, said he was just in town to meet Olivia and then he was heading back to Brazil for a while. Cora was getting married.

“With everything that’s going on I figured I should get back to the States before I got stuck in Brazil… I’ve been back for a couple weeks now.”

“What about Cora?”

“She’ll be fine.”

Derek pulled onto the highway. Stiles set Derek’s phone up to go through his car and give him the directions automatically.

“Still a little offended I didn’t get invited to the wedding.”

Derek rolled his eyes. “It was small. Just her and Tom and their pack.”

“And you and Malia.”

“Yeah.”

“So, your little sister married before you.”

Derek shot him a glare. “I heard you and your girlfriend broke up.”

“Touché.” Stiles sank in the seat.

“I’m glad Cora’s happy.” Derek didn’t look at Stiles. “I don’t need that though.”

“We all need someone.”

“Maybe.”

*

The trip was easy enough.

They bickered about bathroom breaks and stops for food. Cora called at one point. She was surprised to hear Stiles’ voice and even more surprised to find out that Derek’s phone was working through his car.

Crossing the border was fairly easy. Derek had a passport sitting in his glove compartment. It was a fake, which made Stiles’ heart race. Here he was a deputy and trying to get someone across the US-Mexico border with a fake passport.

They hit the store around noon the next day. Less sketchy than the time Scott had him pick up a box of wolfsbane.

Derek’s phone died because he didn’t pack for an overnight trip and Stiles’ phone was on airplane mode because he didn’t have service in Mexico. Which meant they were essentially cut off from everyone else. As long as everything went according to plan, they’d be fine. Not that Scott could do much being fifteen hours away.

He begged Derek to pull over and he got Derek to take a picture of him with a giant cactus.

In Spanish, Derek ordered them food for lunch. Stiles snapped a picture of Derek eating tacos at the turquoise picnic table, his face twisted into a frown. Reminding himself to send it to Scott.

For the second night, Stiles had booked a motel in another small town near the border. The room had two beds so Derek just took the second bed. Geckos climbed the walls and Stiles spent a while trying to catch one. Until Derek got fed up and caught one for him.

*

He slept in the car, Derek nudging him awake at the border. Texts flooded his phone as soon as he switched airplane mode off. Stiles didn’t even read the texts, he just called his dad.

His dad picked up on the first ring. “Stiles, where are you?”

“Just crossed the border, still like twelve hours away. What’s wrong?”

“You can’t come home,” his dad said.

“What?”

“Haven’t you seen the updates?”

Stiles looked over at Derek. “Uh no.”

“If you’ve travelled recently you have to quarantine yourself for fourteen days. It’s mandatory.”

“Why didn’t they tell us that at the border?”

“They should’ve, it was put in place yesterday.”

“Oh shit, what are we supposed to do?”

“You’re supposed to quarantine away from anybody who wasn’t with you.”

“I guess I’ll just, uh –” he looked at Derek – “stay with Derek?”

Derek shot him a look.

“That’d be okay?” his dad asked.

Stiles gave Derek a look back. “Yeah, I mean technically we both have to quarantine even though he can’t get sick, right? He has an apartment. We can survive two weeks.”

Derek rolled his eyes.

“Okay, you’re not allowed to stop at the grocery store or anything either.”

“Fantastic.” Stiles rubbed his forehead. “Alright, well Scott has to get the mountain ash from me anyways so I’ll have him get us groceries and some clothes from your place.”

“Okay, let me know when you guys get in tonight.”

“Will do, I’ll talk to you later.”

“Bye,” his dad said.

He hung up and stared out the windshield.

“I only have one bedroom,” Derek said.

“That’s fine, I’ll sleep on the couch,” he said as he dialed Scott’s number.

According to the rules, they weren’t supposed to stop for food so Stiles ate the snacks he packed, offering a granola bar to Derek.

They switched out drivers halfway through, Derek giving him directions to his new place in Beacon Hills. It was an older looking apartment building, this time not abandoned. Improvement from the last few places he had.

It was just past ten p.m. The apartment building was quiet. Stiles left the box of mountain ash in Derek’s trunk and grabbed his backpack.

Derek flicked on a light. It always interested Stiles to see what Derek’s places were like. What he chose for furniture and for décor. Usually opting for minimal and functional.

The kitchen was right off the doorway. It looked like it had recently been redone with white cabinets and marble countertops. A coffee maker was the only thing sitting on the counters making it look like no one lived there. The counter wrapped around, two stools sitting at the part that jutted out into the living room.

Beyond the kitchen was the living room. Derek actually had a couch that looked comfortable and a TV. Something he didn’t think he’d ever seen Derek have before. There was a small wooden desk in the space between the couch and the wall, stacked with books to the point it was unusable. On the furthest wall was a door and large window.

“Definitely an improvement over your old places.”

“It wasn’t when I moved in.”

Derek turned on lights throughout the apartment.

Stiles wandered down the hallway, on one side was the bathroom looking like it was newly finished as well. The other door was to the bedroom.

A sign of what the apartment had been like. The walls were an ugly yellow with drywall showing in areas the paint had peeled. Various stains across the walls. There was even a hole in the one wall. The flooring was new though, matching the rest of the apartment. Pushed up against one side of the room was a stack of boxes, furniture to be built. The other wall had a box spring and mattress. In the closet was a ladder and painting supplies, along with quite a few moving boxes.

“Why am I not surprised to see that you just put your bed on the ground?”

Derek stood in the doorway with his arms crossed. “I haven’t got to the bedroom yet. I was focused on finishing the bathroom and kitchen. They had carpet.”

“That’s disgusting.”

“Especially with my sense of smell.”

“Well it looks nice, Marie said you were in to get stuff.”

“Yeah, she helped me pick out colors.”

Stiles headed back out to the living room. He was starving, all he had were a couple granola bars and some licorice since this morning.

He opened the fridge, disappointed by the results. A carton of coffee creamer, a block of parmesan cheese, ketchup, and some fancy mustard.

“Dude, you have this giant ass fridge and no food? What the hell were you living off of?”

Derek shrugged and sat down at the counter, he plugged in his phone.

Stiles opened the freezer. “Shrimp... pizza dough... steak... frozen peaches... and what’s this?” He held up a container.

“Lasagna Marie made me.” Derek didn’t look up from his phone.

“She makes you lasagna?” Stiles closed the freezer.

“Sometimes.”

Stiles popped the container in the microwave setting it for five minutes. While it thawed, he leaned on the counter. “Should I even bother checking the cupboards?”

“Probably not, what do you want added to the grocery list?”

“BBQ chips, some of that cookie dough in a tube stuff, oh and pancake mix.”

Derek raised an eyebrow. “That’s what you’re going to live off of for two weeks?”

“You’re right, I also need syrup because the only condiments you own are ketchup and some fancy mustard that probably tastes nasty.”

“It’s Dijon.” Derek typed out a text. “Any foods you won’t eat?”

“I mean I have my list but I feel like you’ll judge me for being a child.”

Derek stared at him, his face expressing his displeasure of their situation.

“Okay, I guess the short list is mushrooms, kale, and sushi.” Stiles pulled the lasagna out of the microwave. “Oh, and I think I might be allergic to kiwi. I always get an itchy mouth when I eat it.”

Derek looked bewildered.

Stiles stuck his finger in the lasagna, it was still cold in the middle. He popped it back in the microwave, turning back to Derek, he licked his finger clean.

“Pasta would be good quarantine food.”

Stiles walked over to the desk stacked with books. Some were about the supernatural but the others were the type of books Stiles didn’t think anyone actually read for fun. Oscar Wilde, Shakespeare, Jane Austen, George Orwell. A little surprising for the big scary werewolf.

A framed picture of Derek and Cora, probably in Brazil, sat on the desk. They were on the edge of a cliff overlooking a gorgeous mountain landscape. The other framed photo surprised him even more than the book selection. A picture of the pack from the previous Fourth of July weekend.

He held it up. “Aw you love us.”

“Lydia gave that to me for Christmas.”

Stiles smiled and placed it down on the desk. “You still put it up.”

The microwave beeped and Stiles walked back over.

“It sucks I missed Christmas this year,” Stiles said.

“It wasn’t that great. Liam got in a fight with Malia, they broke Scott’s dining table right before we were going to eat.”

“I heard,” Stiles laughed. He pulled out the lasagna, dropping it on the counter. “Fuck that’s hot... do you have plates?”

“Above you.”

Stiles dished out the lasagna onto two plates. It wasn’t exactly enough for two people but it would do for one night.

He gave Derek a plate and sat down on the stool beside him. They ate in silence, Derek texting with Scott. At least Stiles assumed.

“Fourteen days of this.” Stiles finished the lasagna. “You’re lucky you can’t get sick.”

“You’ll have to be careful when you go back to work.”

Stiles shrugged. “I’m sure I’ll be fine. I’ve survived worse.”

He picked up the plates and put them in the dishwasher.

Derek stood up and went into his room, he came back with a couple of blankets and a pillow.

“You have more than one set of bedding, right? I’m not like stealing yours?”

“Yes, I have more than one set.” Derek dumped them on the couch. “I’m going to take a shower, you’re good?”

“Yeah all good in the hood.”

Derek rolled his eyes and went into the bathroom. When the shower came on Stiles tried to ignore the idea of naked, wet Derek.

He made up the couch and laid down. Flicking the TV on, he was surprised to see Derek actually had cable and Netflix. He picked a random show and grabbed his phone. Texting Scott a list of clothes and asking for a bottle of Jack Daniels. If he was going to be quarantined with Derek for two weeks he was going to need some kind of alcohol.

Having no pajamas, he stripped down to his boxers and crawled under the covers, watching the inane reality show.

The bathroom door opened.

“Do you want me to shut off the lights?”

Stiles turned around and almost fell off the couch. Derek was standing with just a towel wrapped around his waist. A few stray water droplets trailing their way down his chest.

Stiles swallowed. “Ye-ah.”

Derek raised an eyebrow and smirked. The apartment went dark as he flicked off the light.

“Goodnight Stiles.”

“Night.” Stiles breathed out, falling back on the couch.

If Derek didn’t kill him, Stiles might just die of sexual frustration before the fourteen days were over.


	2. Chapter 2

_Day One_

He tossed and turned all night. The couch was too short. Neck cramp. Too cold. A million thoughts in his mind. The sky was starting to lighten with the sun when he finally drifted into a deeper sleep.

When he woke, his body was stretched across the couch and coffee table, the blankets barely covering him.

The coffee machine bubbled and spat as he sat up. Derek was sitting at the counter, Stiles wondered how long he’d been up for. He pulled the covers up his bare chest. Not liking the fact that Derek totally saw him almost naked.

Derek didn’t acknowledge him. Without saying anything, Stiles picked up his phone and texted his dad to give Scott their air mattress so he wouldn’t have to keep sleeping on the couch.

Stiles pulled on his clothes from the day before and stood up. “I’m assuming we have to wait on Scott for breakfast food?”

Derek finally turned around. “Yeah, sorry. There’s coffee though.”

“No thanks, makes me all shaky and gets my anxiety going. You think I’m annoying now...” Stiles folded all the blankets and neatly piled them on the couch. “I have no idea what I’m going to do for two weeks, I can’t even work from home.”

His dad was going to sort out Stiles’ work situation, he said Stiles might have to take a leave of absence without pay, which wouldn’t be great for the student loans but manageable now that he wasn’t paying rent.

“Good time to practice a hobby,” Derek said.

“I don’t have hobbies, unless binge drinking and watching Netflix counts.”

“Good time to get a hobby then.”

Stiles scrunched up his nose. “Do I really seem like a hobby type person?”

Derek shrugged his shoulders, getting up to pour himself a cup of coffee.

Stiles went into the bathroom and when he came out, Derek was out on the balcony drinking his coffee. Not wanting to disturb Derek, he sat down on the couch and turned on a show, mindlessly watching for the next hour. Waiting for Scott to arrive.

Scott did a couple trips back and forth to his car, bringing up the bags of groceries up along with Stiles’ duffel bag and backpack.

“Marie made a casserole for you guys, it’s in one of the food bags.” He handed Stiles the air mattress. “Your dad said you asked for this.”

“Thanks, the couch is too short for me.”

Derek pulled out his wallet. “How much were the groceries?”

“One-hundred,” Scott said. “Where’s the mountain ash?”

“In the back of Derek’s car, I’ll stand on the balcony and unlock it for you.”

“Great, thanks.” Scott looked at the both of them. “I’m really sorry you guys got stuck like this.”

Stiles shrugged. “Don’t worry about it.”

“Alright, I have to go cause Tess starts work in half an hour. Text me if you guys need anything throughout the week.”

“Thanks.” Derek handed him the cash.

“No problem, try not to kill each other,” Scott smirked.

“No promises,” Stiles said.

Scott shook his head and walked away.

Stiles shut the door and sighed. “I guess it’s just the two of us now.”

Derek put away the groceries. “Do you want breakfast?”

“Yes, I’m fucking starving.” Stiles grabbed Derek’s keys.

The March air was cool and damp. The ground muddy from the recent rain. Scott appeared beside Derek’s SUV and Stiles unlocked the vehicle.

Stiles shouted after him. “Love you Scotty!”

Scott turned around, walking backwards with the box of mountain ash in his hands. “Love you too!”

They didn’t talk as they ate the French toast Derek made.

Derek disappeared into his room after cleaning up and didn’t come back out. Stiles sunk into a depression.

He took a shower and got cleaned up. Slipping on a pair of sweatpants and an old UCLA t-shirt, before opening his laptop and seeing if there was anything needed to be done at work. But he prided himself on finishing paperwork quickly and efficiently, so there was really nothing he could do.

Idle time had never been his friend. Overthinking came naturally to him and free time was its catalyst. He laid on the couch, staring at the white ceiling.

His thoughts drifted to Becca and the two years of his life he wasted in a dead-end relationship. It wasn’t all her fault, just because he didn’t cheat on her didn’t mean he was exactly committed to her.

In the grand scheme of things, Stiles was still young. Though the pressures of watching people around him get engaged and live adult lives still affected him. He couldn’t help but feel like there was something wrong with him, why couldn’t he feel the things other people felt?

Stiles groaned, roughly rubbing his hands across his face. He turned on the TV, switching it to the news.

“The country moves closer to a shutdown as death rates soar. Six counties in the San Francisco Bay area have been ordered to shelter-in-place.”

He shuffled through a few news stations but they were all reporting about the virus. It did nothing but make his anxiety skyrocket so he shut it off.

The apartment was suffocating with its silence. It was like no one else even lived in the building. No floorboard squeak of the unit above or muffled voices through the walls. Not even the sound of a door closing out in the hall.

He found a playlist someone made of old rock songs for the quarantine and turned it on. Getting up and pulling the cookie dough out of the fridge.

The cupboards were weirdly empty. Even him and Becca had filled their kitchen to the capacity. Most of it was hers, she took it all when she moved and Stiles was left with a couple plates, some utensils, a glass and a single pot.

But Derek’s were basically bare. The few cupboards that were full, were neatly organized. There was one cookie sheet and Stiles’ managed to find some parchment paper.

An upbeat song about the end of the world came on. He remembered his parents listening to music like this and the lyrics came back to him. As he got into the song, he danced around the kitchen, forgetting he wasn’t the only one there. He wiggled his hips, spooning out the cookie dough onto the pan.

“ _It’s the end of the world as we as know it_ –” he sang into the spoon – “ _and I feel fine_!”

He belted out the parts of the song he knew, still dancing as he put the cookies in the oven and set the timer.

Turning around, he let out a yelp.

Derek was standing in the living room staring at him with his eyebrows raised. “What are you doing?” Derek tried to suppress his smile without luck.

“Making cookies, trying to forget the shitty situation going on.” Stiles turned down the music. “I’m so bored.”

“It’s only been an hour.”

“What are you doing in your room? Avoiding me?”

Derek shook his head. “Just finishing up some work.”

“You work?”

“Here and there.” Derek leaned his hands on the counter. “Did you want to do something?”

Stiles was surprised by the offer. “Uh, sure, what were you thinking?”

“I have cards, if you wanted to play.”

“Anything beats watching more TV.”

Derek walked over to the TV stand and grabbed out a deck of cards from a box.

“How long do you think you’ll keep this place?”

Derek shrugged. “Probably permanently. Seems like a waste to go through all the work of renovations just to get rid of it.”

Stiles sat down at the counter. “I’m going to be honest up front, I only know the game Crazy Eights.”

“That’s not surprising.”

The smell of cookies filled the apartment as they played a couple rounds of Crazy Eights. Derek beating him every time.

Stiles pulled the cookies out of the oven. Leaving them on the stovetop and sat back down.

“What if I teach you how to play Durak?” Derek asked.

Stiles grimaced. “That’s too close to Darach for my liking.”

Derek huffed out a laugh. “How about Rummy then?”

“Sure, if I _have_ to learn something new.”

Stiles’ phone buzzed with a text from Scott. She _can’t wait to see her uncle Stiles again_.

It was a picture of Olivia lying on her changing table. Her onesie had a picture of a wolf and said _raised by wolves_. Stiles thought it was hilarious when he bought it. Little did Scott know, he’d bought the same outfit for every age, up until ten years old. He was planning on giving her one every year.

He grinned and showed Derek the picture.

“I’m assuming you gave her that outfit?” Derek asked.

“Hell yeah.” Stiles texted a reply and set his phone back down. He picked up the cards Derek had dealt him.

A frustrating thirty minutes passed of Derek trying to explain the rules of Rummy and Stiles failing to learn. He gave up. Instead they ate cookies together.

“Would you ever want kids?” Stiles asked.

Derek broke his cookie in half. “I think if I was with someone who wanted kids then sure, but I wouldn’t have kids without a partner.”

“I want kids. At least I think I do. Before Olivia was born I thought, no way, seems like a selfish thing y’know? You love yourself so much you decide the world’s gotta have more of you? Even if you’re a shitty human being.” Stiles looked over at Derek. “But then I met Olivia and I saw the way Scott and Tess are with her and I suddenly understood.”

Derek raised an eyebrow. “There’s no guarantee your baby will be as cute as Olivia.”

Stiles knocked his shoulder off of Derek’s. “Who knows? At this rate, I’ll probably have to adopt... then I could pick the cutest kid out of the bunch.”

“You’re only twenty-six Stiles, I hardly think you’re running out of time.”

“I’m going to die!” Stiles shouted. “This is how I go, I’m going to _literally_ die of boredom.”

“It hasn’t even been one day,” Derek said from the kitchen.

Stiles propped himself on his elbows. “Yeah, _exactly_.”

“You could help make dinner.”

Stiles rolled off the couch. “Fine. What are you making?”

“Just some chicken and vegetables.” Derek stood at the counter chopping carrots.

“What can I do?”

“Stir the sauce so it doesn’t burn.”

“That’s it?”

“Yeah.”

Even though the kitchen had been redone there wasn’t a lot of space. It was a small apartment after all. Having just two people in the kitchen was pushing capacity. He squeezed past Derek careful not to let their bodies touch.

He leaned against the counter and stirred the orange sauce.

Derek’s focused completely on chopping vegetables. His biceps rippling with every press of the knife. His beard was thicker than how he used to keep it, but not long in the gross hipster way a lot of men were doing. A few grey hairs grew throughout his beard, something that surprised Stiles since he thought werewolves aged slower. Or something. He never figured that part out. It just made Derek better looking anyways.

“I can feel you staring,” Derek said. His voice flat.

“Sorry.” Stiles directed his attention back to the stove.

His phone buzzed in his pocket and he grabbed it out, abandoning the sauce.

It was Tori. He hadn’t heard from Tori since him and Becca broke up or any of their other mutual friends now that he thought about it. She had sent him a screenshot from Instagram, it was Becca and her co-worker all cuddled up on a couch together.

_They’ve apparently moved in together. Crazy._

Stiles scoffed. He’d deleted Becca off social media because he didn’t want to see pictures like that. But now Tori was sending him these things and he didn’t know why. Probably to start drama. Without replying he deleted and blocked her number.

But then curiosity got the better of him and he pulled up Becca’s page on Instagram. The past few posts were her and her new boyfriend. Captions detailing how much she loved him and how they were meant for each other.

All the same bullshit she’d posted about him at the beginning of their relationship, until it all went to shit. He looked at her profile, all the photos of her and him had been deleted. Not that he was surprised.

“Something’s burning,” Derek said. He put down the knife and came over to the stove.

Stiles slid his phone into his pocket. “Whoops.” He picked up the spoon and started stirring again.

“Stiles, I just asked you to make sure the sauce didn’t burn. That’s all.” Derek stared at him with his intense glare he seemed to only ever direct in Stiles’ direction.

“I got distracted! I’m sure it’s fine.” Stiles cringed as he saw a few black flakes float through the sauce. “I can just scoop those out.”

“How hard was it to just stand there and stir?”

“Oh my god, I’m sorry. It’ll taste fine.”

“It’s burnt.”

Stiles threw his head back. “Barely, it’s _barely_ burned. Just go back to your chopping.” Stiles pushed his shoulder, ignoring the bulge of muscle under his hand.

Stiles picked out the burnt chunks and ignored his phone when it buzzed again. A little scared of Derek’s reaction if he pulled it out.

Dinner turned out fine, it was one of the best meals Stiles ever had. But Derek just glared at him when he said so.

He pushed the coffee table out of the way and laid out the air mattress, blowing it up before pulling the sheets on and throwing the borrowed pillow on the bed.

Derek sat on the couch reading so Stiles pulled out his sketchbook that was still in his backpack from when he moved. He’d picked up the skill in college as an elective and found it kept his hands busy and his mind focused enough that the usual thrum of anxiety quieted.

He sat on the other end of the couch, facing Derek and resting the sketchbook on his knees so Derek couldn’t see. It wasn’t really something he liked to show people.

The last thing he’d been working on was from months ago. A sketch of Becca, lying in bed with the sheets pulled up to her waist and nothing else on.

He ripped out the page crumpling it up, Derek didn’t even look over at the sudden noise. Stiles threw it out before settling back on the couch.

He tapped the pencil against the blank page. The hardest part was figuring out what he wanted to sketch. He looked around the room, it was usually easiest to see the thing he was drawing. His gaze settled on Derek. A piece of artwork in his own way.

_Day Two_

At least he was better rested than yesterday. Again, Derek was up at the crack of dawn. His coffee maker spitting away and something sizzling in the pan.

Stiles groaned as he rolled over. “Are you going to be up this early every morning?”

“It’s eight a.m.”

Stiles buried his head under the pillow and went back to sleep. When he woke up again, Derek had opened the blinds and was sitting out on the balcony, it was a sunny day. Probably fairly warm compared to the weather they’d been having.

He picked up his phone. His dad had sent a text checking in. Sending off a reply he got up. There was a plate of bacon sitting on the counter. He grabbed a piece before going out to the balcony.

“Morning,” he grumbled. He squinted angrily at the blinding sun.

Derek looked over at him, phone in his hands. He was on a video call with Cora.

“Derek... why is Stiles at your place at nine in the morning? Did you guys _bone_?” Cora shouted.

Derek’s cheeks went red as Stiles’ own cheeks heated up.

“We got quarantined because of our trip to Mexico,” Derek said.

Stiles sat down next to Derek.

Cora started laughing and she didn’t stop until she was wheezing. “Oh my god, you two got quarantined together?”

“It’s not funny Cora, my life is at serious risk!” Stiles shouted.

Derek glared at him. “I haven’t threatened you once.”

“Not out loud.”

Derek tilted his head to one side, agreeing with Stiles.

“For how long?” Cora asked.

“Fourteen days,” Derek said.

“Oh my god.” Cora started laughing again.

They sat out on the balcony for a while talking to Cora, well, Stiles mainly talked to her while Derek held the phone. He hadn’t seen her for a long time, she came for a short visit to his house around Christmas when she was here but that was it.

Stiles helped Derek build the new bookshelf for his living room. A little surprised Derek trusted him to do it right.

“Do you still talk to Isaac at all?” Stiles asked.

Derek froze. Looking over at Stiles from where he sat on the ground. “No.”

“Scott hears from him once in a while. I guess he’s doing okay, he’s in Washington now, has a girlfriend and a new pack.”

“That’s good.” He focused back on the pieces in his hand.

“He never said what happened between you two,” Stiles said.

“I –” Derek leaned his head against the wall - “I did something I shouldn’t have. Something terrible, I thought it was the only way to protect him. After that, we couldn’t really go back to the way we were.”

“Did you ever apologize?”

Derek gave him a look.

“Of course not, you’re Derek Hale.” Stiles rolled his eyes. “Maybe if you had apologized things could’ve been different.”

“You’re doing that wrong.” Derek watched as Stiles screwed a piece on. “They don’t go together.”

“I think I can read some instructions Derek,” Stiles said.

“You’re reading them wrong.”

Stiles exhaled, falling backwards onto the floor. “Why’d you even get furniture like this? You know they make stuff you don’t have to assemble?”

“I had it shipped.” Derek appeared above him. “And I didn’t expect you to be the one putting it together.”

Stiles handed him the piece. “Expect nothing in life otherwise you’re going to be disappointed.”

“That’s optimistic.”

Stiles laughed. “Funny coming from you... you’re putting that shelf in upside down.”

Derek paused, looking closer at the shelf. He took it out and flipped it over.

Finally, the shelf came together and Derek moved it to a spot beside the desk. Stiles passed Derek books off the desk and he organized them onto the shelves.

“What’s your favorite book?” Stiles asked, looking at all the titles. He’d only read a handful. Back in high school when it was mandatory for passing English class.

“I don’t have a favorite.”

“You’ve read all these books and you don’t have a favorite?”

“Not really. I have authors I prefer over others but that’s about it.”

“The only books I’ve ever read for fun were the Harry Potter series. They were okay. Don’t really get all the hype.”

“Wow, if my sister could hear you right now.”

“Cora?”

Derek froze with his arm out in front of him, his hands still on the book he just put down on the shelf. He looked up at Stiles with wide eyes, like the comment surprised him. “No... Harper... she was a year older than Cora. Loved Harry Potter.”

Stiles sat down on the desk chair. “She died in the fire?” He leaned forward.

Derek nodded. “She was human.”

He knew that Derek had to have more siblings, having mentioned that there were children who’d died in the fire. Cora and Derek never mentioned them. He barely even talked about Laura. But Stiles had seen a couple of old pictures, there were more people in Derek’s family.

“How many siblings do you have?”

“Four sisters,” Derek smiled. “Harper and Mia were both human.”

“You don’t talk about them.”

“What would I say? Nothing will bring them back.” Derek shook his head, as if he was trying to get rid of the thoughts of his sisters. “Are you going to pass me more books?”

Stiles sat back in the chair and grabbed a stack, handing them to Derek.

“I know that it was just my mom I lost and definitely not in the same horrific circumstances you lost your family... but it helps. To talk about her, keep her memory alive. At least with people who knew her.”

Derek wouldn’t look at him, he was hyper focused on sorting the books.

“My mom read Harry Potter with me... it’s probably the only reason I got through all of them and maybe the reason I don’t really like them anymore... because even after all these years it still fucking hurts to think about her.”

Derek smiled sadly at the books on the shelf. “Yeah.”

As Marie’s casserole heated up in the oven, Stiles pulled the comforter off the air mattress and wrapped it around himself.

“You do realize it’s like sixty-two degrees in here.”

Derek looked up from his phone. “And?”

“For a human that’s freezing.”

“Oh. Okay. Well what do you want it at?” Derek stood up walking over to the heater under the window.

“Seventy is usually an average house temperature.”

The heater beeped and turned on, the flow of hot air hitting Stiles on the end of the couch. Derek sat back down.

“Thanks.” Stiles turned back to his sketchbook.

They sat quietly, Stiles’ music playing softly from his phone. Derek looked engrossed in whatever was on his phone.

“Do you have a hobby? Something you do when you aren’t brooding or fighting off hunters?”

Derek sighed, lowering his phone. “I read and cook. Work out. This is the most free time I’ve had in a while though.”

“Your whole life is like a mystery to me. I didn’t even know you were such an avid reader. Though I should’ve since you’re able to quote Shakespeare and speak like four languages.”

“Six.”

“You speak _six_ languages?”

“Well seven if you count English.”

“What are they?” Stiles shut his sketchbook, sitting up on the couch.

“Spanish, Portuguese, French, Italian, Japanese, and Latin,” Derek said, directing his attention back to his phone. “I also know a bit of Arabic, but not enough to read a full book.”

“Oh well that’s just shameful. Not able to read a book of Arabic? What are you? Stupid?” Stiles smiled, nudging Derek’s leg with his foot.

Derek smiled in return and pushed his foot away.

“What’s the coolest place you’ve travelled to?” Stiles asked.

“Please tell me you’re not going to spend the next twelve days asking me questions.”

Stiles rolled over on the air mattress, Derek sat on the couch behind him. They’d been watching a movie but it was predictable and too romantic for Stiles’ tastes.

“What else is there to do?”

“Be quiet and watch the movie.”

He pushed Derek’s knee. “Are you going to answer the question or not?”

“I don’t know. Maybe Bagan.”

“I don’t even know where that is.”

“In Myanmar, South Asia.”

“Do you travel a lot?”

Derek paused the movie, knowing Stiles wasn’t going to stop talking.

“I used to.”

“Where else have you been?”

“All over Europe, South America, Asia, a bit of western Canada.”

“So, like, everywhere.” Stiles sat up. “Do you travel alone?”

“Yeah, for a couple years I travelled a lot with Cora but then she met Tom and settled down into her career.”

“I want to travel, once I have money,” Stiles said. He grinned, raising his eyebrows. “Maybe we can go together.”

“Why would we do that?”

Stiles scoffed. “So, we’re not alone... don’t you ever get sick of being alone all the time?”

Derek started the movie again. “Just watch the movie.”

“I am. Sick of being alone. Not even in the romantic way. When I was dating Becca I was always alone.” Stiles settled back into the air mattress, grabbing his phone and playing a game against Tess instead.

_Day Three_

The third day of quarantine brought more bad news about the virus spread and Stiles worried about his dad and Marie.

His and Derek’s routine was the same at that point, Derek up early, making breakfast. Stiles complaining about how early Derek gets up. Showers, getting dressed, Stiles didn’t really see the point of getting ready but it felt good to be clean. He lived in sweatpants and old t-shirts. Derek still wore jeans most days.

Scott and his dad checked in daily. He’d lay around and complain about being bored until Derek agreed to do something with him. Derek usually spent most of the day in the bedroom, Stiles didn’t know what he did in there and didn’t ask.

Derek made the meals, Stiles helping out here and there, he wasn’t a good cook though and Derek usually ended up pushing him out of the kitchen, so Stiles would just sit at the counter and watch him.

There was a tension, underlying all their interactions. Probably from the last time they were together, but Stiles pretended like he was too drunk to remember. It still made his cheeks heat up and his neck burn with embarrassment when he thought about it.

After finishing another TV series, Stiles shut off the TV and rolled off the couch. He opened the cupboard, looking for his BBQ chips but all he could find was a bag of regular.

“Where are the BBQ chips?” Stiles searched the other cupboard, filled with snacks Derek had bought.

“Uh...” Derek cringed. 

Stiles turned around, glaring at Derek on the couch. “Did you eat all the BBQ chips?”

“You mean the handful that were left after you ate the rest of the bag?”

“Derek! Those were our only chips, now that they’re gone what am I supposed to eat?” Stiles slammed the cupboard door shut, but Derek had those fancy cupboards that had the soft close so it gave him no satisfaction.

“There’s a bag of regular chips right there.”

“Those aren’t the same!” Stiles shouted. “If you like regular so much why didn’t you just eat those?”

“A lot of demands for someone that didn’t even pay for the chips.”

“ _A lot of demands for someone that didn’t even pay for the chips_ ,” Stiles said in a mocking tone, grabbing out the regular chips.

“Did you really just do that?”

Stiles rolled his eyes. “Did you really eat all the BBQ chips?”

“You left like ten in the bag!”

“They were for later! Not for you!” Stiles flopped onto the couch and opened the bag. He leaned against Derek, looking at his phone. “Who ya talking to?”

Derek quickly locked his phone. “Just Cora.”

“That was a little suspicious for it just being Cora.” Stiles shoved a bunch of chips in his mouth at once. “Is it a _girl_?”

Derek shoved him off his shoulder, putting his phone down on the side table. “Maybe if you ate them one at a time you wouldn’t go through so many.”

“Derek, there’s a couple things you should know about me. I am kind of a paranoid asshole –”

“Kind of?”

Stiles glared at him. “I love Star Wars and I refuse to watch the newest series. And I will never eat my chips one at a time.”

Derek looked at him with disbelief.

“I’m not going to apologize for who I am,” Stiles winked.

Derek reached for a chip and Stiles batted his hand away.

“Hell no, these are mine. Get your own.”

“Those are mine.” Derek laughed, reaching for the bag.

Stiles held it above his head, scooting to the furthest end of the couch. “Not anymore.”

Derek moved at superhuman speed, pinning Stiles to the couch and grabbing the bag.

Stiles let it go as if the bag had burned him, pushing Derek off of him. “Werewolves suck.” Stiles sat up, willing his body to stop reacting the way it was to the weight of Derek.

Derek raised an eyebrow, putting a single chip in his mouth. When he finished eating the chip, he handed the bag back to Stiles.

“We’re resourceful.”

He licked his lips, Stiles’ eyes following the movement instinctively.

Derek cleared his throat. “I take it I should start dinner?”

There was a hint of wanting in his eyes but Stiles was sure he was imagining it.

“Sure.” Stiles shoved more chips in his mouth. Breathing out as Derek finally got up and went over the kitchen.

Derek’s phone buzzed with a couple messages and Stiles looked towards Derek standing in the kitchen. He had his back to Stiles, seemingly like he didn’t hear his phone. So, Stiles slid over. A little curious to see why Derek was so keen on keeping his phone hidden.

Maybe a new girl he didn’t want the pack to know about yet. He usually kept his girlfriends private until they became more serious. Or until they started asking about his friends at least and Derek had to pretend like he was a normal healthy functioning human being.

The messages were from Scott, he didn’t understand why Derek would lie about that.

_Derek?_

_Are you ignoring me because I told you to be careful?_

_You know there’s a good chance this won’t end well._

_I’m going to assume you’re busy and not ignoring me._

Stiles moved away from the phone before Derek saw him. He sunk back against the couch.

Scott and Derek were close, he knew Derek actually told things to Scott. Opened up a bit, Scott never repeated what Derek said, he wanted to maintain the trust and Stiles respected Derek’s boundaries. But why was Scott warning Derek to be careful?

“Stop eating those chips, you won’t be hungry for dinner.”

“Okay _dad_.” But he rolled the bag up and got up to put them away.

The way Derek moved around the kitchen, or sat on the balcony and read a book, or watched a movie, had a lightness to it Stiles had never seen in Derek.

As if over the years, the heartache and trauma faded and he started to forgive himself. Or at least he started to move on. Derek laughed and made jokes, smiling at things people said, even things Stiles said. He came along on pack trips and brought side dishes to group dinners. It was like a new man had grown in the broken shell of what he had been.

“You seem happier,” Stiles said.

Derek paused, the pot of noodles in his hands. He glanced at Stiles, smiling. “I guess I am. Things have gotten easier.”

“You deserve happiness,” Stiles said quietly.

He wanted everyone in his life to be happy. Derek though deserved it more than others. Life had been unkind to him for a long time. Most of it wasn’t even his fault and he was just trying to survive.

Derek didn’t look at him as he continued to dish out the pasta. “So, do you.”

“I think I’m happy, I have no reason not to be,” Stiles shrugged. “I think the more upsetting part of breaking up with Becca is the fact that it wasn’t that upsetting, you know?” Stiles traced a grey vein on the kitchen counter. “Scott had Allison as his big first all-consuming love, and then he had Kira who he genuinely loved. And now Tessa. The most I got was an unrequited crush for ten years and as soon as we got together we realized that we loved each other like friends. I thought Becca was my chance but now I realized it was just easy.”

“Part of growing up is realizing love isn’t a fairytale.” Derek put down a plate of pasta on the counter. “Real love is steady and sometimes boring, but it’s about always having someone who stays.”

“Have you ever been in love? Like real love, not teenage love?” Stiles pulled the plate towards him and twirled the noodles on his fork.

Derek sat next to Stiles at the counter. “No, I mean I think I loved Braeden for a while in some way. But it wasn’t true love, not a healthy one. We had a lot of issues.”

“So, I’m doomed to be a thirty-two-year-old bachelor with a tiny apartment and watching everyone else around me get married?”

“Maybe if you weren’t such an asshole you’d find someone,” Derek smirked.

Stiles shoved a huge bite of pasta in his mouth. “Can’t change me baby, it’s too late.”

“You can still have a fulfilling life without being in a relationship.”

“Only single people say shit like that,” Stiles grumbled through a mouthful of pasta.

“Yeah,” Derek chuckled softly. “Maybe.”

Stiles washed the dishes while Derek dried them and put them away. Not for the first time, Stiles let his mind wander to a future where this was their everyday life. Stiles coming home from the police station to Derek making dinner, washing dishes together, fighting over what to watch on TV. Stiles must’ve been desperate for the domestic life if he was fantasying about it being with Derek.

They finished up the dishes, going back to the couch.

Derek read for a while and Stiles tried to ignore the feelings he was starting to have again. He needed a distraction.

“Okay... weirdest place you’ve had sex, three... two... one... go!”

Derek blushed, lowering his book.

“Oh my god, where did you have sex Derek?”

“I don’t want to talk about this.”

Stiles shook his head. “You don’t get to have that kind of reaction and not tell me.” Stiles crossed his legs, facing Derek. “Where was it?”

“Cemetery.”

Stiles burst out laughing. “No! You’re joking, you’re just trying to keep this image of gloomy Derek Hale with his leather jacket and burnt down mansion.”

“Not joking,” Derek grimaced.

“Seriously Derek?”

“Not my proudest moment.”

“I need to hear the story.”

“I don’t think you do.”

Stiles kicked his leg. “Come on, you gotta tell me how you ended up having sex in a cemetery.” Stiles started laughing again. “Was it with a vampire?”

Derek frowned. “Vampires don’t exist.”

“Interesting to know, but don’t change the subject.”

“Fine. It was with Karly. We went to the cemetery to visit her friend’s grave one night and she initiated things.”

“I have _so_ many questions. Like first off, did you do it on her friend’s grave? Also, why would she initiate it? Why would you do along with it? It was at night? Of course, it was.” Stiles laughed. “Oh my god, this is _gold_.”

“It happened against a tree away from the graves, on the path back to the car.”

Stiles swallowed, thinking about Derek pinning him against a tree and just taking him. He could see the appeal, if he was dating someone like Derek he’d always down be for sex.

“And Karly is someone who deals with things... a little differently.”

“She gets horny from death? She’s one of those?”

Derek’s face broke into a small smile, not able to hold it back. “Yeah she was... and I wasn’t complaining.”

Stiles laughed. “Oh my god, who knew you were such a horn dog.”

Derek put his book down. “Why, what’s yours?”

“Behind a church, while I was dropping off Brian. His family is super Catholic, didn’t know about me, or that he’s gay,” Stiles laughed. “He was late to morning mass because he was having sex with a dude behind the church. Only fun thing Brian ever did.”

“I think that’s actually worse than mine.”

“I’m unashamed, fuck his family they were dicks.” Stiles stretched out and put his feet in Derek’s lap.

Derek didn’t even flinch, he just placed his hand on Stiles’ ankle. “Is that why you guys broke up?”

“No, I’d never leave someone because their family didn’t approve... It was just a year of mediocre sex and boring dates. Once we broke up, it was so much better, Brian became this pretty fun person to hang out with... we’re partners at work now, I hang out with him outside of work too, he talks to me about his family stuff.”

“That must be hard, having a family that doesn’t accept you.”

“The first time I brought a guy home to meet my dad I almost passed out I was so nervous. I don’t know why, my dad didn’t even blink.”

“Was it that much of a surprise?”

“What does that mean?”

“Even without werewolf senses, you’re not exactly subtle. Especially in high school.”

Stiles’ cheeks flushed. “Alright, not my fault. But anyways, I met Brian’s family. Did _not_ go over well. Especially after I accidentally let it slip we’d been together for nine months at that point.”

“I can’t see you doing well meeting anyone’s parents.”

Stiles scoffed. “Mothers usually love me... I can be charming if I need to be.”

“Bullshit.”

“Charmed you, didn’t I? Look at us, three days in and we’re friends.”

“It took me ten years to tolerate your presence.”

“Oh funny, man’s got jokes.” Stiles poked Derek’s stomach with his toe. “I can’t believe we’ve known each other for ten years.”

“Yeah.” Derek squeezed his foot.

They stared at each other, so many moments stretched over ten years. A lot of bad, heart wrenching moments. But lately, they became better. Moments that Stiles remembered fondly.

Derek was the first to look away. He was always the first to look away, the first one to pull away, when Stiles thought maybe they were starting something, Derek withdrew.

Stiles turned on the TV. “What do you want to watch?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

Stiles didn’t move his feet from Derek’s lap, he switched on a crime movie he’d been meaning to watch and the room fell quiet. Both of them ignoring what could be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lyrics quoted from It's The End of the World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine) by R.E.M.


	3. Chapter 3

_Day Four_

“Hey Stiles, I can’t talk for too long,” Scott answered the phone.

“No problem, I just needed some human contact other than Derek.”

There was a pause. “Is everything alright?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t it be?”

“Oh, uh, no reason.” Scott shushed Olivia. “She’s been crying since Tess left for her shift.”

“Am I supposed to feel sympathy for you? I’m trapped in a five-hundred square foot apartment with Derek Hale.”

“How are things going?”

“Fine... better than I thought they would. He’s like actually kind of a fun person.”

Scott scoffed. “Wow, imagine that. Listen, I gotta go.”

“I don’t like how Olivia has replaced me as the most important person in your life,” Stiles said, his tone joking.

“She’s less of a handful.”

“Can you get us more groceries?”

“Already?”

“Derek ate all my chips.” Stiles pouted, he could see Derek shaking his head out on the balcony.

“Send me a list, I’ll bring them by in a couple days.”

“Thanks Scott.”

“Okay, talk to you later.”

“By-”

Scott was already gone.

He sighed and threw his phone on the air mattress. As much as he adored Olivia and wouldn’t trade her for anything, it sometimes sucked having a best friend who had a kid when he wasn’t at the same stage of life.

He joined Derek on the balcony, the sun hitting his face and lifting his mood.

“Holy shit it’s warm out.” Stiles stretched his back.

The way the balcony sat blocked out all the wind, the sun beating down.

“How was Scott?” Derek looked up at him.

“Busy with Olivia, said if we send him a grocery list then he can bring them by in a couple days.”

“Great.”

Stiles took off his shirt. Not self-conscious anymore. He worked out a couple times a week to keep in shape for work and while he was no Derek or Scott, he wasn’t the skinny kid he used to be.

“What are you doing?” Derek stared at him.

“Might as well get some sun while I can, I’m pasty.” Stiles sat down, splaying his legs out.

When Derek touched his shoulder, he flinched. Derek swept his thumb over the old scar, the skin raised and discolored but small.

“You were so stupid.”

“Still saved you, didn’t I?” Stiles said with a smile. A little thrown off by Derek’s touch on his skin.

Derek still looked guilty whenever someone mentioned that day. Stiles never brought it up because he knew Derek felt so shitty about what’d happened.

“You almost died.”

“But I didn’t. Here we are two years later, trapped in your apartment together. Are you wishing things turned out differently?”

Derek frowned. “No, I’d never wish that.” Derek turned back to his book.

He watched Derek read for a few moments. Remembering the time he took a bullet for the man.

Just because Stiles had a college degree and a career in law enforcement didn’t stop him from being a dumbass. A big fucking dumbass who decided that taking a bullet intended for a werewolf was a good idea. Turns out wolfsbane is poisonous to humans too. And there’s no antidote so they just treat the symptoms and hope for the best.

It all happened so fast, he noticed the hunter pull the trigger before anyone else, aimed right at Derek. He didn’t hesitate to push Derek out of the way, the bullet hitting him in the shoulder. Which was fine, he’d survive, it hurt like a bitch but he’d be okay. Better than Derek getting it to the heart.

But suddenly his pulse skyrocketed and his hands went numb, it started to get hard to breathe and Scott tried to get him to take deep breaths. The last thing he remembered as he passed out was Derek ripping the hunter’s throat out.

Derek was asleep in the chair beside the bed when he woke up in the middle of the night. A blanket draped across Derek’s body.

Melissa peaked in and smiled when she saw Stiles awake. She opened the door and quietly came over to the side of the bed with a new IV bag.

“Never thought I’d be so relieved to see someone’s eyes open,” she whispered as she traded out the IV bags.

“What happened?” The memories foggy. His limbs weak and tired.

“You took a wolfsbane bullet to your shoulder –”

He looked down, he was shirtless and bandages covered his right shoulder. The covers were pulled up under his armpits and his arms were covered in IVs.

“– you’ve been in a coma for the past week, just started breathing on your own yesterday. I can’t believe none of you knew wolfsbane is poisonous to humans too, how you guys are still alive after all these years is beyond me.”

Stiles lifted his left hand to his neck. It felt like a thousand little needles being pushed into his throat every time he swallowed.

“It’ll be sore from the breathing tube.”

“Why’s Derek here?”

“You saved his life. He’s barely left the waiting room all week. Same with your dad and Scott... your dad spends all day in here, we force him to go home at night with Scott and Derek spends the night in here so you’re not alone.”

Stiles frowned looking over at Derek, he didn’t realize Derek cared so much about his wellbeing.

“Where’s Becca?”

“She’s been around, busy with work.” Melissa looked at Derek. “She didn’t take the news so well, but she comes by a couple times a day, especially on her slower days.”

Becca was a paramedic, she was in the hospital all the time. But Stiles knew she didn’t do well with people in her life getting hurt. After her sister died it left her with high stress whenever something like this happened.

Stiles nodded. “I hope she’s alright.”

“Tess spends a lot of time over with her.” Melissa patted his hand. “I’m going to go call Scott so he can let your dad know.”

“Okay.”

Stiles waited until she was out of the room before he called Derek’s name.

Derek sprung up, looking at the blanket on his body in confusion. He put it on the chair and moved closer to the bed.

“You’re awake,” Derek said, his eyes full of worry.

“It’s nice to see you care.”

“Stiles, what were you thinking?” Derek shook his head. “Why would you do that?”

“To be a hero,” Stiles said. They both knew it was a lie.

“You almost died.”

“It was aimed for your heart. Would’ve killed you,” Stiles muttered.

“So, you thought it was better for you to take it?”

“I didn’t realize wolfsbane is poisonous to humans. Obviously.”

Derek gave him a look. The same look he had a few times over the years they’d had known each other, a little bit of awe and surprise, like he just couldn’t believe what Stiles had said or done.

“I’m okay though, still alive.”

“Don’t do anything like that again.”

“No promises,” Stiles groaned. “Can you get me some water? My throat is killing me.”

Derek picked up a cup from the table next to the bed, holding it up for Stiles. He took a couple sips from the straw and settled back into the pillows.

“Glad I’m not living with my dad anymore, otherwise this would be one huge lecture.”

“I think you’re still going to get a lecture.” Derek sat down in the chair.

Stiles tilted his head.

Derek looked like shit. Even worse than the time _he_ got shot with the wolfsbane bullet. Sunken eyes, purple bags, greasy hair.

“Why don’t you go home? You look like you need some serious TLC yourself.”

“I will once your dad gets here.”

“You know what this reminds me of?”

“What?”

Stiles figured Derek was just amusing him because he saved his life and almost died doing so. But he was happy that Derek took the bait.

“The time when I got shot in the foot... also while saving your ass.”

“That was entirely of your own doing and I ended up having to save you.”

“Mm. I think maybe years of getting beat up has left your memory a little worse for wear.”

They stared at each other, Stiles breaking out into a grin, knowing full well that Derek had to carry him from the building.

His dad, Marie, Scott, Tess, and Becca all showed up to the hospital together. Melissa snuck them in. They crowded the bed all smiles for him. Derek slipped silently out of the room.

He didn’t see Derek again at the hospital. When he got out, Scott told him that Derek left town again. Stiles tried not to feel bitter about it. But it was hard. Not even a goodbye to the person who almost died for him.

Right after he thought that he felt a surge of guilt. Derek had a lot of people die and it wasn’t fair to blame him for reacting the way he did. Plus, he didn’t owe Stiles anything.

Life went on. He had a permanent scar on his shoulder but soon it was the only reminder anything had happened. He went back to work and his relationship with Becca. Derek was back to doing whatever and that was that.

“What are you staring at?” Derek said.

Breaking Stiles out of his memories.

“Nothing.” Stiles looked away, suddenly feeling exposed sitting there on the tiny balcony with his shirt off. He picked up his phone, tapping it against his knee. “Just... why didn’t you come back to the hospital once I woke up? I was there for another three days.”

“I – it was hard seeing you in there knowing it was because of me... and seeing your dad the way he was... the blame he put on us, which was right of him, it was our fault but it was overwhelming.”

“He blamed you?”

“Both of us. Me and Scott. He wasn’t thinking straight, it was only a couple hours after you got there and they had to intubate you. They’d just told him there was a good chance you weren’t waking up.”

“Is that why you spent the week in the waiting room?”

Derek smiled softly. “Yeah, I couldn’t be in there with him. But I couldn’t leave, not knowing if you were going to be okay.”

“He shouldn’t’ve blamed you. It wasn’t your fault.”

“He apologized. He came by the day after you woke up, said he knows that I’ve saved your life plenty of times before and that he shouldn’t have lost his temper.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You almost die and you say sorry?”

“Yeah.” Stiles wanted to reach out and touch him, hold his hand. Maybe if he was talking to Lydia or even Scott, he would’ve, but not Derek. “Why didn’t you tell me before?”

“I didn’t want you to get mad at your dad, it was a stressful time for everyone. And he didn’t mean it... no big deal.”

“I wouldn’t have been mad. Alright, I probably would’ve been. Maybe it’s a good thing you didn’t say anything... I got reamed out by him in the hospital, thank god they had me doped up on pain meds,” Stiles laughed. “Becca told me I shouldn’t hang out with you anymore because she didn’t want me risking my life. Little did she know I’d been doing it since I was sixteen.”

That just made Derek look more guilt ridden.

“Once again... not your fault. Did you know it was me who forced Scott to go into the woods the night he got bit?” Stiles chewed his lip. “I still feel a bit guilty for that.”

“Seems like you got the short end of that stick. Scott got the power, the true alpha, all the perks. You’re still human and in the same situation as him.”

Stiles glared at him. “Thanks for the reminder. Peter offered me the bite y’know, I said no.”

Derek’s eyes widened. “Why didn’t you accept it?”

“Well honestly, it was tempting. I won’t lie about that. I wanted to say yes, but it almost seemed power hungry. I saw what it did to Peter and no offense, but you too. And I mean, what if it didn’t take and I died? My dad would have a dead wife and son, all because I wanted some special abilities. Also, it was Peter. So, there was no way I was trusting him.”

“That makes sense I guess, I was always told it was a gift.”

“I know, which don’t get me wrong, I think it’s awesome. But I’m good with being human. I make up for it in different ways,” Stiles grinned.

Derek smiled.

“I’m a little offended though that you didn’t offer me the bite. I mean come on, Isaac?”

“You were already a pain in my ass, I didn’t really need you being a newly bit werewolf on top of that.”

“Did you ever think about it though? You must’ve realized it could’ve got Scott to join your pact.”

Derek shrugged. “I figured it would piss Scott off even more.”

“You’re probably right and there’s a good chance I would’ve taken it and said no to joining your pack.”

“You would’ve taken the bite from me?”

“More likely than with Peter, but probably not.”

The clouds had moved and the sun had gone in, it was getting chilly on the balcony. Stiles sat up, slipping his shirt on.

“I’m going to watch something, want to join me?”

Derek stared at him for a few seconds, before closing his book and standing up.

“As long as it’s not that reality show you’ve been watching.”

The rain started and for the rest of the day they didn’t move from the couch. Starting and almost finishing the first season of _The Witcher_. Derek’s face screwing up in a frown when Stiles said the main character reminded him of Derek.

They microwaved leftover for dinners and Stiles fell asleep on the couch. When he woke up the apartment was dark, the TV still playing. His head was resting on Derek’s shoulder, he blushed as he sat up.

“I think I drooled on you,” he said.

Derek smiled. “You were pretty out, I tried waking you but you just said to leave you alone.”

Stiles laughed. “I’ve spent the last year barely sleeping... I think I’m finally catching up.”

“I should go to bed.”

Stiles thought about telling him to stay, or asking him to take Stiles to bed. He was horny and lonely and knew it wouldn’t be a good decision. They were finally getting along and Stiles didn’t want to ruin it by suggesting sex. Even as much as he’s wanted to have sex with Derek over the years.

“Me too.” Stiles peeled himself off the couch, sliding down onto the air mattress. “You can leave the TV on, I like the background noise.”

Derek handed him the remote and went into the bathroom.

Stiles stared up at the blank ceiling. This quarantine was forcing him to think about things he didn’t want to think about. Things he had suppressed for a long time. 

_Day Five_

“I’m so bored, I would literally do anything right now.”

Derek's voice came from the bedroom. “Anything?”

Stiles paused, not sure if Derek was suggesting what he thought he was suggesting. “Anything.”

“Can you come here?”

Stiles’ mouth went dry as he got up from the couch and walked into Derek’s bedroom. The mattress and box spring were pushed into the middle of the room and covered with plastic. The room had a least one layer of paint on the walls. Already looking a lot better than before.

“What’s up?” His voice came out more strangled than he’d like it to.

Derek stood up. In his hands was a paint brush. “There’s the roller over there, you know how to paint? The walls need another full coat, I’m just cutting in the edges again.”

“Oh, you want me to paint.”

Derek frowned. “Yeah, what did you think I wanted?”

Stiles spun around before Derek could see the blush that was inevitably crawling across his face. “Nothing.” He picked up the roller and started painting.

Soft music played from a Bluetooth speaker and Derek’s choice of music surprised him.

“Never took you for an indie listener.”

“It’s relaxing.”

They painted in silence for a while and Stiles mellowed out. It was kind of nice. The up and down of the roller. Consistent movements, over and over again.

Derek started on the trim and he was good at painting, barely made mistakes. Part of it probably had to do with his werewolf physical abilities.

“Where do you see yourself in five years?” Stiles asked.

“What?” Derek was painting the trim in the closet.

“Like five years from now, what does your life look like?”

“How am I supposed to ever know that?”

Stiles laughed. “It’s supposed to just be fun. What you dream of.”

“Oh, I don’t know, I don’t really think about things in that way.”

Stiles rolled his eyes. “Okay, well think about it now.”

“What’s your life like in five years?” Derek asked.

“No student loans, preferably living in a house I own, maybe in a committed relationship. Doesn’t have to be the all-consuming true love. Just someone I don’t get bored of.”

“I guess mine is being settled down, not necessarily with anyone, but staying in one place more often than I do now.”

Stiles moved onto the last wall.

“What do you do now? You said you work.”

“Off and on. Freelance work as a private investigator. Mainly missing persons.”

Stiles paused the rolling, looking over at Derek in the closet. “Seriously?”

Derek nodded.

“You’re one of those.”

Derek laughed. “What does that mean?”

“Cops don’t like PIs They’re annoying. Get in our way. I think we’re just jealous you guys can cut corners we can’t.”

“I’ve worked with police all over California, they don’t seem to have a problem with me.”

“Interesting...” Stiles lowered the roller. “I think I’m done.”

Derek came out of the closet and looked around the room. “How did you get it on the ceiling?”

“I don’t know, this is the first time I’ve painted.”

“Sometimes you amaze me with the stupid things you do.” Derek turned back to the closet.

Stiles rolled the paint up Derek’s back.

Derek spun around. “What are you doing?”

Stiles laughed, rolling up Derek’s chest. “Just amazing you with the stupid things I do.”

Derek grabbed the roller from him.

Stiles grinned. “Still want my help?”

“No.”

“Okay, nap time for me.” Stiles left the room and washed up, before lying down on the air mattress and dozing off in the afternoon sun.

As Derek made dinner that night, Stiles poured himself a Jack and coke, Derek side eyeing him.

“What? I can’t have a drink?”

“Do you drink often?”

“Not anymore.”

Stiles chugged it faster than he probably should’ve.

Pouring another drink, he looked over at Derek. “This is my first drink since the start of quarantine, I think I’m doing pretty well.”

Stiles put on some music and danced around the living room idly, taking a closer look at a couple of the décor pieces Derek had put up throughout the room.

“Where’d you get this?” He held up a purple rock made out of individual cubes clustered together.

“Malia gave it to me, she’s into all that now.”

Stiles put it back down and finished off his drink. “Weird how you two are cousins.”

“Why’s that weird?”

“I dunno, I lost my virginity to her...”

Derek laughed, stirring the vegetables in the pan. “So?”

“And like Peter having a kid? Yuck.”

“They’re actually pretty close now.”

“That’s even weirder than you two being cousins.” Stiles poured another drink. “Where’d you learn to cook?”

“Why is it always twenty questions with you?”

“I’m just curious about your life, you’re so secretive and I finally get a chance to know things. I like knowing things. About you. It’s nice.” Stiles ducked his head down, staring at the drink in his glass.

His tolerance for alcohol had lessened over the years with not drinking as much. Two and a half drinks loosened his inhibitions enough for him to say things he normally wouldn’t.

Derek put the lid on the pan and leaned his elbows on the counter, his face close to Stiles.

“I learned to cook over the years because I enjoy doing it and had nothing better to do.” Derek looked up at him, his eyes a little sad but the lines around them creased with a smile. “Plus, it’s impressive for dates.”

“Nothing hotter than a man who knows how to cook.” Stiles finished off his drink. “If you’re not careful, you might just seduce me.”

Derek’s eyes widened and he stood up fast, turning back to the stove.

“That was a joke,” Stiles said.

Derek’s shoulders didn’t loosen their tension. “I know.” His back still straight as a board.

“You need to relax a bit.” Stiles clapped his hands together. “Oh, you should definitely try yoga, that’d be funny to watch you try to do yoga. Becca used to drag me to yoga, it was awful.”

Derek didn’t say anything, he just continued making dinner. Stiles leaned his elbow on the counter, propping his head up.

“Do you know why we broke up?”

Derek glanced back at him. He looked unsure. Not that he didn’t know the answer, but instead that he didn’t know where the conversation was going on.

“I’m sure Scott told you, since you two talk so much.” Stiles accidentally let the bitterness slip into his voice.

“Maybe you should stop drinking.”

Stiles frowned. “I think I’m allowed to be a little sad over my situation. My girlfriend cheated on me for a year. A whole year. Now she’s moved in with the guy and I’m living at my dad’s. Well I’m living with you cause of this whole mess, but like that’s any better.”

“Because I’m so awful to live with? I cook every meal and keep to myself. You’re the one that has all their stuff everywhere even though it’s not even your apartment. And you’re always around, asking me questions, prying into my life.”

“Tell me how you really feel. Please, tell me how horrible I am.”

“I didn’t say that.” Derek took a deep breath. “Stiles, I just don’t know how to navigate you.”

“What?” Stiles stood up. “What the hell does that mean? Navigate me? I think I’m a pretty easy person to navigate. Food and hanging out with me makes me happy, I’m good with just being friends. And for the love of god, just call me once in a while.”

“I’m not following this conversation anymore.”

“Why do you never call me?” Stiles shouted.

Derek flinched. “What?”

“You always talk to Scott but half the time I don’t even know you’re in town,” Stiles said, the frustration leaking into his voice. “I thought by now, I’d get a call once in a while letting me know what you’re up to or even just a text. I mean for god’s sake, I’ve literally taken a bullet for you. That doesn’t make us close enough to talk more than three times a year?”

“It goes both ways.”

Stiles shook his head, pointing at Derek. “No, it definitely doesn’t. I was always the annoying kid you had to deal with.”

“That’s true,” Derek smirked.

“Derek, I just don’t understand. Why do you never call?”

All amusement disappeared from Derek’s face. He moved around the counter, close to Stiles.

“I don’t know, I guess I never had a reason to.”

Stiles’ crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow. “Do you always have a reason to call Scott?”

“We were always closer, it’s like me calling Cora to check in.”

“Oh so, I just wasn’t important enough to you.”

“Did I hurt your feelings?” Derek smiled, he put his hand on Stiles’ shoulder. “I promise going forward, I’ll call.”

“Good.” Stiles dropped his arms, pushing Derek’s chest. “I’m holding you to that.”

After dinner, Derek disappeared into his room and Stiles picked up his clothes from around the living room. He shoved them in his duffel bag. He collected his laptop and charger, putting them away into his backpack before neatly making his bed on the air mattress.

Derek leaned against the hallway wall, his arms crossed as he watched Stiles bring the glass of water he had on the TV stand over to the kitchen.

“You didn’t have to do that.”

“You’re right, I’m a terrible person to live with, always have been. I’m sorry I got so mad. And that I’ve been prying into your business. I promise I won’t ask any more questions.”

Derek pushed himself off the wall, walking over to Stiles. “It’s nice that someone wants to know about my life. I overreacted earlier, I really don’t care about your clothes lying around or you not cooking.”

“You’d probably actually care more if I did cook.”

“It’s been strangely nice having you here.” Derek looked down at his feet. “Which is something I thought I’d never say.”

Stiles smiled, wrapping his arms around Derek’s waist.

“What are you doing?” Derek stayed rigid in his arms.

“This is called a _hug_.”

Stiles breathed in the scent of Derek, nuzzling his nose against Derek’s neck. He was just trying to be friendly.

Derek slowly wrapped his arms around Stiles’ shoulders, his back still in a straight line, not letting any of the tension in his body go.

They’d never hugged before. Ever. Stiles wasn’t a hugger and either was Derek obviously, and so it was never a thing they did at pack get-togethers. It felt nice, really nice, and before Stiles could develop a situation he pulled away, giving Derek a drunk smile.

“Are we friends again?”

“I don’t remember us being friends before,” Derek said seriously, but then his face broke into smile.

Stiles pushed him. “That’s not funny asshole.”

“Yes, we’re friends.”

“Good. Can you not barricade yourself in your room then? I’m lonely out here.”

Derek rolled his eyes, but moved to the couch and picked up a book.

Stiles grabbed his phone and played another round against Tess before giving up with it and having another drink. He aimlessly danced around the living room again and played Solitaire at the counter.

Once that got boring, he flopped on the couch, lying his head in Derek’s lap to get his attention.

Derek’s thighs tensed up. “What are you doing?”

“I’m bored,” Stiles slurred.

“You’re drunk.”

“I guess you’ve never been drunk eh? You never had that rite of passage in high school.”

“I’ve been drunk.”

Stiles sat up. “What?” He spun around, to face Derek.

“When I became human for a bit, Braeden got me drunk.”

“Awe man, I missed drunk Derek? What’s he like? Angry? A crier? Oh nope, I know –” Stiles held up his finger – “happy drunk. Dance on table drunk.”

“I threw up.”

“What?” Stiles laughed.

“I wasn’t exactly used to it.”

“You’re sloppy drunk! Welcome to the club,” Stiles grinned. “ _Lots_ of bad decisions were made in college.”

“I know. You called me one night.”

“What? No, I didn’t.”

Derek smiled. “Yeah, I figured you didn’t remember you sounded pretty out of it.”

“What did I say?” Stiles cheeks heated up. “Wait, I don’t think I want to know. No –” he tilted his head trying to think of what he could’ve said – “yes, I do. Actually, let me get another drink and then I want to hear about it.” He poured another drink and sucked it down. He slammed the glass onto the coffee table. “Okay, time for a cringey story about drunk Stiles.”

“You called and apologized for getting me arrested for Laura’s murder.” Derek put his book on the side table.

“Okay that’s not so bad, I am sorry, it was a shitty thing to do.”

Derek brushed it off. “You didn’t know any better, I mean I did bury her body on my property. Not the best decision I made.”

“I feel like that whole era was just us fixing bad decisions made by Derek. I mean Jackson? Come on.”

Derek glared at him. “Do you want to know what else you said?”

“Not really, but yeah continue.”

“You talked about some guy named Travis.”

“Oh no!” Stiles shouted, covering his face. “I didn’t.”

“Nothing too graphic… just that it was another unrequited crush.”

Stiles could feel the blush creeping down his neck, the conversation was starting to come back to him as if Derek triggered some deep repressed memory in his mind.

“And then you went on and on about Lydia and Scott and how sometimes you wished you were back in high school and we were all together again,” Derek smiled. “And then you said… that you missed me.”

“That’s awful.” Stiles slid to the ground, burying his face in his knees.

“At that point, I wasn’t in a good place and just knowing someone out there cared enough about me to miss me was nice.”

Stiles lifted his head. “Really?” He looked back at Derek.

Derek wouldn’t meet his eyes. “And I don’t know why I’m telling you this now.”

“Because I’m drunk and vulnerable so you should be at least one of those.”

“You should go to bed.”

Stiles wiped his face roughly. “I don’t feel like sleeping.” He looked at Derek, hoping his face conveyed what he wanted.

Derek swallowed, looking away. “Well I’m going to go to bed before I get dragged into your bad decisions.”

Stiles pouted, he turned so he was on his knees in front of Derek. “Eighty percent of my drunk bad decisions turn out to be really fun.”

Derek stood up. “Goodnight Stiles.”

“Night.” Stiles stayed in the middle of the room as Derek’s bedroom closed. Sighing, he rolled onto the air mattress. He couldn’t even jack off with Derek so close, he’d know it the second Stiles started.

He settled into the air mattress ready to binge watch a stupid show until he passed out. Derek’s door opened and Stiles thought maybe he changed his mind.

The light in the living room flicked on.

“Ah my eyes!” Stiles shouted, covering his face with his pillow. “What are you doing?” Not letting the little bit of hope he felt leak into his voice.

“The paint smell is going to give me a headache,” Derek said.

Stiles peaked out from under the pillow, Derek was setting up the couch with a blanket and pillow.

“Do you want the air mattress? I can take the couch for the night.”

“I’m okay.” Derek shut off the light again and laid down.

“Do you want the TV off?”

“It's fine.” Derek put his arm over his eyes.

He seemed to fall asleep pretty quickly. Stiles watched his chest rise with every breath.

Slowly Stiles reached out for Derek’s hand that laid on the couch. He laced his fingers with Derek’s and sunk back into the air mattress. Derek squeezed his hand lightly, in a way that told Stiles he might not be as asleep as Stiles thought.

_Day Six_

By the time Stiles woke up, Derek was cooking breakfast. His head pounded and he groaned as he rolled over. Derek turned around, holding the spatula in his hand.

“Morning,” Derek said.

Stiles looked at the half empty bottle of Jack Daniels on the table. “Well I’m wearing all my clothes which is an improvement to the other times I’ve drank that much whiskey.”

Derek shook his head as he turned back to the stove. “Do you want eggs?”

“Mm. I’d take an egg sandwich.”

“That’s not what I offered.”

“I’m sick,” Stiles pouted.

“You’re hungover.”

Stiles rolled onto his side and picked up his phone. “Still feel like shit.”

His dad had texted, asking for him to call later today. He texted an affirmative and once his morning boner was gone he got up.

When he came out of the bathroom, Derek was sitting at the counter, eating his breakfast. An egg sandwich with bacon, cheese, and lettuce sat on the counter in front of the stool Stiles had claimed as his.

He ran his hands through his hair and smiled. “Thanks.” Stiles sat down.

It was a bit awkward, Stiles hadn’t drunk enough to completely forget last night and it felt like they had crossed some line they weren’t supposed to.

They ate in silence and Stiles cleaned up from breakfast as Derek got ready in the bathroom. He came out in just his underwear and wet hair, fresh from the shower, and Stiles almost dropped the bowl of fruit salad he was covering with plastic wrap. A knowing smirk appeared on Derek’s face as he ducked into his bedroom.

Skipping a shower because he was too hungover, Stiles changed into a clean pair of sweatpants and video called his dad.

“Hey Stiles,” his dad smiled. He was sitting on the couch with Marie, they both looked relaxed and happy.

“Hey guys.” Stiles laid back on the couch. “How’s it going?”

“We’re doing well, Marie’s work is close indefinitely and I took the next two weeks off.”

“Wow, look at you. Man of leisure,” Stiles said. “Don’t let him relax too much Marie... he’ll turn to mush if you let him.”

Marie laughed. “Don’t worry I’ve already written a list of things around the house for him to do.”

His dad frowned and turned to her. “You’re not serious?”

She patted his stomach. “Gotta keep you in shape.”

Stiles smiled, he was glad his dad wasn’t alone during this time.

“How’s it going there?” his dad asked.

“Good, almost a week in and so far I have no symptoms.”

His dad nodded. “And Derek? He’s surviving?”

Stiles fake gasped. “I’m a delight to live with.”

“In a one bedroom apartment with no escape...” his dad grimaced.

“Derek! Come tell my dad what a great roommate I am!” he shouted.

“I think you’re forgetting we were roommates for twenty-two years.”

Stiles laughed. “I guess so.”

Derek appeared behind him in the camera. “Hello Noah, Marie.”

“Oh good, he’s still alive at least,” his dad said.

“Hi Derek, how are you?” Marie asked.

“I’m good, thanks for sending that casserole. It was delicious.”

Stiles’ face screwed up. “I’ve literally never heard anything like that come out of Derek’s mouth before.”

Derek scoffed and leaned on the back of the couch behind Stiles. “Maybe because you’ve never done anything nice for me.”

Stiles turned his attention back to his dad and Marie. “He always forgets the time I held him up in the pool for two hours with serious risk to myself.”

In the camera, he could see Derek smile at the back of his head.

“Also, what about the time I was willing to cut off your arm even though I would’ve ended up with some serious PTSD?”

He didn’t mention the time he took the bullet for Derek, when he actually almost died. They were all thinking it but it went unsaid.

“Normally parents worry about their kids getting too drunk or doing drugs or having unprotected sex in high school. Of course, my kid couldn’t be normal,” his dad said.

“We would’ve never met if he was normal,” Marie said.

She was an emissary. He and Scott met her when they had to make nice with the new pack. A stroke of fate brought his dad out to the new pack’s house one day when Marie happened to be leaving and it was an instant connection.

“That’s true.” His dad wrapped his arm around her shoulder. “So, what are you guys up to today?”

“Oh well, really exciting day planned. I scheduled some lying on the couch time and then some snack time. Then I plan to take a nap and watch the entirety of that new tiger documentary everyone’s raving about.”

“Productive.” His dad rolled his eyes. “Derek?”

“I’m going to build the bed frame, finally finished painting.”

“Oh, what colour did you decide to go with?” Marie asked excitedly.

“Gray Owl,” Derek said.

“Oh, very nice, does that mean you’re doing the blue accents I suggested?”

“Yeah, I’ll send a picture when I’m done.”

Stiles shuddered. “I don’t like the Derek you bring out Marie, he’s domesticated.”

If he wasn’t on a video chat with his dad he figured Derek would’ve smacked him upside the head for that comment.

Marie ignored Stiles. “Send pics of the other rooms too. I look forward to seeing the place when it’s done.”

“Will do, have a good day.” Derek stood up.

His dad and Marie called their goodbyes. Stiles talked to them for a while longer.

There was a knock on the door and Stiles said goodbye to his dad and Marie before answering it.

Scott had a couple of grocery bags in his hands. “Hey, got the groceries you guys asked for.” He held up the bags.

“Perfect, did you get the stuff I asked for?”

“Yeah what I could find.”

“Whatever you were able to get is great. I’m just so bored,” Stiles grabbed the bags and put them on the kitchen counter. “How’re you guys?”

“Tessa’s a little stressed cause she has no idea if Olivia can get sick or not and with being a nurse, she could bring it home on her. When she comes home it’s like the mass exodus of cleaning.” Scott leaned against the doorframe. “But Olivia is healthy so far. Hi Derek.”

Stiles moved over so Derek could stand with him in the doorway.

“Thanks for picking those up, how much do I owe you?” Derek was holding his wallet.

“Oh, let me chip in this time.” Stiles perked up.

“It’s fine, I got it,” Derek said.

“But I had Scott buy a lot of stupid shit.”

“Stiles, seriously it’s all good.”

Scott looked between the two of them. “Uh, it was one fifty.”

“What the hell did you have him buy?” Stiles asked, he didn’t send off the final list of groceries, just his list of things.

“You eat a lot.” Derek shrugged and gave Scott the money.

Scott laughed. “I can see quarantine is going well.”

“Yeah I mean we’ve only fought a couple times. Did you get me more chips by the way?”

“I got you guys six bags.”

“Thank god.”

“I have to get to work, but if you guys need anything else just let me know.”

“Thank you,” Stiles said.

Scott gave Stiles an undistinguishable look before leaving. Derek handed him the items as Stiles put them away in the fridge.

“Do you want lunch?” Derek asked.

“Do you even have to ask? Since apparently I eat a lot.” Stiles took the bag of random stuff and sat down on the kitchen stool.

“Sandwich good with you?”

“Sure.” Stiles grabbed out the glow in the dark stars. “Hell yeah! I’m going camping!” Stiles ripped open the package and put the sticky tack on the back of the stars.

“You’re not seriously putting those up in my living room, are you?”

Stiles shrugged. “Why not?” He paused. “Do you actually care?”

Derek let out a defeated exhale. “Go ahead.”

He dragged the stool over and spent the next twenty minutes sticking all the stars to the ceiling.

“Out of all the things Scott could’ve picked up, why did you get glow in the dark stars?”

“Uh, cause they’re awesome?” Stiles said. “He didn’t just get those though. I got a whole bag of goodies.”

Derek put the sandwiches down on the counter. “Lunch is ready whenever you’re done.”

Stiles stuck the last star to the ceiling and got down. He dragged the stool over and sat down. Moving the bag of toys away so Derek couldn’t see what else he got.

After lunch, Stiles passed out on the air mattress. He dreamt of Derek. Not in the usual sex dream kind of way. They were just lying in bed cuddling. Derek laughing over something Stiles said. 

When he woke up, it left a hole in his chest. Not once in his life had he felt the way he did in his dream. It made him miss something he never had. Intimacy and simplicity in a relationship.

“What’s wrong?” Derek asked.

Stiles jumped, turning over. Derek was sitting on the couch with his book.

“Jesus Christ, were you watching me sleep?”

“No. It’s too cold to sit on the balcony and the paint smell is still too strong in my room –” Derek waved his book at Stiles – “I was just reading.”

“Alright weirdo.”

“Don’t think you’ve changed the topic. Why are you so sad?”

Stiles sighed, rolling onto his back and looking at the stars he’d put up. “I’m just going through some things right now in my life. And quarantine hasn’t helped because now all I have is time to think about it. I hate that you can sense emotions. It’s totally an invasion of privacy.”

“You weren’t like this before.”

“Do we have to talk about this?”

“No.”

“Great.” Stiles propped himself up on his elbow. “I’m hungry.”

“We just ate lunch.”

“How long was I asleep for?”

“Like two hours.”

“So, we didn’t just eat, we ate two hours ago.”

Derek lowered the book. “Why don’t we just have leftovers for dinner? I think there’s still some of Marie’s casserole and there’s the pasta.”

“Sure.”

Disoriented from his nap, Stiles rubbed his face and curled into a fetal position. He watched Derek read, wondering if he’d ever feel the way he did in his dream. Wondering if he could ever feel like that with Derek, if that was at all a possibility.

“Stiles. I can feel you staring.”

“Sorry.” Stiles covered his head with the covers.

Something poked his leg and he peaked out of the blankets. Derek had put down his book and was lightly kicking Stiles.

“What’s wrong?”

“Ever feel like the world’s passing you by?”

“Right now, stuck in quarantine or in general?”

“In general, like everyone has important things going on and moving forward and you’re stuck.”

“I don’t think you have to worry about not being on track with others. Twenty-six is still young, you have lots of time left.”

“Rationally I know that, I wouldn’t even want a kid or to be married right now, but watching all my friends getting engaged or having kids or even buying a house. It just makes me feel like there’s something wrong with me.” Stiles wouldn’t meet Derek’s eyes. “I don’t feel things like a normal person.”

“One day you’re going to meet the right person and everything will fall in place. But chances are it won’t happen the way you expect it to.”

“How about you? Is that what you want? A house, marriage, kids. Normal people stuff. Are you still holding out for the right person?”

Derek shrugged. “I honestly don’t know.”

Stiles helped Derek lift his mattress onto the new bedframe. The room looked great with the fresh paint and new furniture. Derek grabbed out a new blue-grey bed set and Stiles helped him pull it on the bed. Derek screwed in a shelf on the one wall, putting a framed photo of his family prior to the fire up along with a decorative vase.

Stiles picked up the photo. They were all sitting on the porch of the old Hale house. An older couple were in the middle of the group with Talia and who he assumed was Derek’s dad on one side, and Peter with another woman and man on the other side. In total, there were seven kids surrounding the adults.

“Wow, your one sister looks identical to you.”

Derek came up behind him. The heat of his body soaked through Stiles’ clothes.

“That’s Harper and the girl beside her is Mia –” Derek pointed to the older couple – “they’re my grandparents, my mom’s parents. My aunt and her husband... their two kids. All human.”

“Wow... and everyone here...”

“Gone. In the Hale fire. Well except the obvious.”

“I’m sorry Derek.” Stiles put the photo back down.

He turned around, not expecting Derek to be as close as he was. Derek didn’t look sad, instead he just looked tired.

“It’s not like you had anything to do with it.”

“I know, but I’m sorry that senseless hatred took your family away from you.” He squeezed Derek’s arm.

Derek turned away and Stiles wiped his eyes, the few tears that had collected there.

Stiles cleared his throat, putting his hands on his hips. “It doesn’t look too shabby in here.”

“Just have the dresser and side tables to put together,” Derek said as he put the blinds back up.

Derek laid on the couch, the bedroom still too strong for his werewolf sense of smell. Stiles sat at the counter, taking the Nerf guns out of their packaging. He couldn’t believe Scott actually bought them.

“What is that?” Derek asked.

“Nothing!” Stiles laughed, glancing back at Derek. “Just something to keep me entertained.” He spun around and shot Derek.

“Stiles!” Derek stood up.

“Years at the gun range have prepared me for this moment.” Stiles stood up and tossed Derek the other gun. “Face me like a man.”

Derek held the gun like he didn’t know what to do with it. “I’m going to kill Scott.”

Stiles shot him in the forehead and Derek’s eyes flashed blue. “Big bad werewolf should have a better reaction time than that.”

Derek shot the gun at Stiles, but he ducked, shooting Derek in the stomach.

They shot at each other for a while running around the small apartment. Derek grinned when he got Stiles in the face, Stiles retaliated by tackling him onto the ground, half on the air mattress.

He threw his hands up. “I took Derek Hale down!”

“You smell like alcohol.” Derek’s nose wrinkled.

Stiles slumped down. “I didn’t drink today!”

“It’s coming out of your pores.”

At that exact moment Stiles was suddenly well aware of how close their crotches were, he let out a rough breath, scrambling to get off Derek before anything embarrassing happened.

“Fine, I’ll shower.” Stiles tossed the gun onto the counter. “But I won.”

“Yeah.” Derek sat up, watching Stiles pick up his pajamas from the ground. “You did.”

Stiles took a long time in the bathroom. He needed a break from all the Derek and this was the only time he got to himself. Only eight more days and he’d be free.

His skin was alive with the familiar sensation of arousal. The long drawn out kind. Regretting not taking the chance to have rebound sex over the month he lived at the apartment alone. At least it would’ve taken the edge off. The first thing he was doing once he got out of there was jerking off. Probably at least a couple times.

By the time he got out of the bathroom, Derek was watching a show.

Stiles flicked off the lamp and laid down. “Behold our night sky!” Stiles held his hands up above his head, the stars glowing.

Derek shut off the TV. The street light in the parking lot shone in Derek’s place. Stiles’ eyes adjusted to the dimmer lighting.

“Did you want to do something?” Stiles asked.

“I’m tired.”

Stiles counted his fingers absently. A bad habit picked up after being possessed by the Nogitsune.

“Brian texted me today, said he wrapped up the case we were placed on just before I went to Mexico. A woman went missing on the full moon... Figured there was a good chance she was dead because her place was destroyed and there was blood everywhere. But they found her, in the middle of the woods eating a raw deer, completely naked.”

“That sounds like something you should tell Scott about.”

“I did,” Stiles said. “He said he’d check it out as soon as he could. That case was the most exciting case we’ve gotten in a long time and I completely missed it.”

“Why didn’t you go into the FBI?” Derek asked.

“I thought about it. After doing the six-month internship, I decided to get a degree first. And then after that, I wanted something easy so I applied to the academy instead. When I finished my year, there was deputy position open in Beacon Hills and it just made sense. I could keep an eye on my dad, be around my friends again. Plus, Beacon Hills has cheaper rent than any city with an FBI office.”

“Do you think you’ll ever consider being a FBI agent again?”

Stiles tapped his fingers on his stomach. “I don’t know... that was high school Stiles. I wanted out of Beacon Hills, away from all the bullshit that kept happening, but then once I was gone I realized that the people here are more important than a career would ever be.”

Derek hummed in agreement.

“When you’re not here, where do you go?”

“All over California for my work. I spend a lot time in Brazil with Cora.... now I’ve started spending more time at my new house.”

Stiles sat up. Derek was lying on his side, already facing Stiles.

“New house?”

“Yeah, it’s a ranch. Two hours south-west of here.”

“Why aren’t we quarantining there? Why’d you bring us to your tiny one bedroom apartment?”

“Because it’s close to people we know and the house is pretty rough. I still have a lot of work to do to it and I knew you wouldn’t want to stay there.”

Stiles huffed out a breath. “That’s not surprising, do you ever get places you don’t have to work on?”

Derek shrugged.

“Why’d you get a ranch anyways? Doesn’t seem like your kind of thing.”

“One day I want to move there permanently. It’s got a big property and no one else around for miles.” Derek looked away. “I guess it was kind of my five-year plan. Just thought it’d be a good place for if I ever had a family. I don’t know, seems useless now.”

“You have this whole double life and I don’t know what to make of it.”

“It’s lonely. Everyone I know has someone else who means more to them than me.” Derek laughed in a bitter way. “Saying that out loud sounds pathetic though.”

“I get that.”

“You have your dad.”

“I know but that’s a little different, I have to mean everything to him. That’s just the rules. Plus, with Marie there, I mean don’t get me wrong I love her, but it makes things different.”

Derek nodded.

“I just thought by now I’d be settled down, I thought there’d be more to life.” Stiles leaned his back against the couch, his head tilting back on the cushion near Derek’s stomach.

Derek’s fingers hesitantly pushed into his hair, and he rubbed his fingertips across Stiles’ scalp, sending chills down his spine.

“Why do you keep coming back to Beacon Hills? Why rent this place if you aren’t even here most of the year?”

Derek’s hand didn’t move from his hair. “Most of you guys are still here and I consider myself part of the pack. I don’t rent this place. I own it, it’s technically a condo. Figured I could fix it up, maybe rent it out.”

Stiles stared at the stars glowing. “It’s definitely an improvement from your burnt down house and the loft... and that other house you were squatting in for a while. But still, you could afford something way nicer than this.”

“I guess I like fixer uppers.”

“Or maybe you’re still punishing yourself,” Stiles muttered.

“What?” Derek’s hand retreated.

Stiles turned around. “Don’t get like that. I’m just saying maybe it’s because you feel responsible for a lot of bad things that’ve happened and you won’t let yourself be happy.”

“This really isn’t any of your business,” Derek said as he sat up on the couch.

“I feel like we’re past the point of getting defensive.”

“Why don’t you just worry about yourself and I’ll worry about myself?”

“I don’t have anything to hide, I’m an open book.”

“You’re worse than me.”

“Oh really, _Mr. Psychologist_ , then hit me with some cold hard truths about Stiles.”

“Did you ignore the signs that Becca was cheating because you were scared of being alone? Or because you resent the fact that Scott’s had three chances at _true love_ and your dad’s had two, while you’ve had none?”

Stiles eyes burned with his tears. “Okay, that – fuck you Derek.” He stood up, trying to balance on the air mattress. “I was trying to be your friend.” His body jerked around as he awkwardly stepped off the air mattress.

“Stiles –” Derek blocked his way to the bathroom – “I shouldn’t have said that.”

Stiles wiped the tears from his eyes. “But you did,” he said. Hating that his voice cracked.

“I’m sorry.” Derek’s brows twisted together.

Derek was right.

He knew for a while something was wrong, he figured Becca was cheating but never wanted to know the truth so he just pushed it away. Bought her flowers and took her to restaurants. Talked about the future with her even though she’d brush it off.

Finding out was an accident. He forgot his lunch at home and just ran over during his break to grab it. And there they were on the couch and he couldn’t keep ignoring it anymore. She moved out the next day.

Derek saw right through him. Of course he did. He always did.

Stiles shrugged, brushing off Derek’s apology. “It’s all true... what you said... but you forgot to mention how much I hate myself for resenting their happiness.”

“Stiles...” Derek reached out, grabbing his arm.

He didn’t know who made the first move. It didn’t matter.

Derek’s lips were on his, his beard dragging across Stiles’ chin. He shoved his fingers through Derek’s hair and pulled him in. Stiles’ whole body was on fire as Derek lifted him into his arms.

Stiles groaned. This is what he wanted, _needed_. He needed to be close like this, with someone who wanted him, with someone he wanted.

And he wanted Derek so badly. Had for years but it was never a possibility. He was too young. Derek was presumably straight. They never got along. Derek had a girlfriend. He had a girlfriend. All the excuses faded away.

Derek pulled off Stiles’ shirt and kissed his way down Stiles’ neck. His teeth grazed over the sensitive skin and Stiles arched his body into Derek’s chest. He never liked being given hickeys but the things Derek was doing to him drove ecstasy through his body and he just wanted more naked skin.

“Bed,” Stiles muttered.

They fell down together. Stiles rolled on top of Derek, grinding their dicks together through their pajamas. Arousal pulsed through his stomach.

Trying to get access to more skin, Stiles desperately pushed Derek’s shirt up his chest. For years he wanted to run his hands over Derek’s chest, feel the contours of his muscles, the coarseness of the hair that had grown. He let his body take over, guide him. If this was the only chance he got to be with Derek then he wanted it to be good.

Finally getting Derek shirt off, he pulled Derek’s pants down his hips, his hard dick springing up to his stomach. Silky skin burning hot under his lips, kissing his way down Derek’s chest.

Stiles glanced up at Derek as he took Derek’s dick in his mouth.

Derek’s eyes snapped shut. 

Stiles moved with precision from years of practice. Derek’s hands tentatively pushed their way into Stiles’ hair. He moaned with appreciation and Derek’s hips jerked up. Stiles just swallowed him deeper, feeling Derek against the back of his throat made his own dick throb.

The breathless moans fueled Stiles as he bobbed his head up and down. He patted Derek’s hips with his hand, hoping to get across the message. Derek moved his hips slowly and Stiles moaned again, staying still.

“Stiles... fuck.” Derek gripped his hair tighter and fucked his mouth.

Stiles used his free hand to trail down to Derek’s hole, slick with spit running down from his dick. He traced the hole, gently pressing against it with his finger. Derek didn’t protest, instead he shifted his hips down. An acceptance of the invitation.

As he took Derek’s dick, he pushed in slowly, making sure his finger was coated in spit. Derek let out a broken cry, thrusting his hips faster.

Stiles tightened his grip on the bottom of Derek’s dick and twisted his finger into Derek. He crooked his finger, searching for that spot. The one that always sent electricity down to his own toes. Stiles found it and massaged it in slow circles.

“Stiles I’m - I’m going to –” Derek’s words broke into a cry as Stiles pressed his finger harder against his prostate.

His hips bucking up once more before his dick started pulsing, warm cum hitting the back of Stiles’ throat. His hole clenched around Stiles’ finger and he coaxed Derek through his orgasm, his hips twitching up towards Stiles’ mouth.

As Derek stilled, Stiles pulled away slowly and sat up. He wiped the spit from his mouth onto his arm.

“So, that just happened...” Stiles’ voice came out husky. He cleared his throat, the salty taste of Derek’s cum in his mouth.

There wasn’t going back this time. It happened, Stiles was sober and Derek hadn’t stop him.

Derek pushed himself onto his elbows, looking completely wrecked. “Where’d you learn to do that?”

“College was good for something. I was a bit of a slut,” Stiles smirked.

Derek fell back onto the pillow.

“I’m assuming you’ve been with guys before?” Stiles asked, hating that Lydia was right all along.

“Yeah,” Derek laughed.

Stiles ran his hands up Derek’s thigh. “What’s the chance you can go for round two?”

Derek glared at him. “I’m not that old.”

“Mm. I’m not so sure, thirty-two is basically middle age.”

Derek moved so quick Stiles didn’t have a chance to react. He got Stiles on his back, dragging his pants off of him.

“What did you have in mind?” Derek quirked an eyebrow up.

Stiles rolled over and reached for his duffel bag, he found the lube in the pocket and handed it to Derek.

“I want you to fuck me.”

Derek’s eyes widened as he took the lube. “Did you have Scott pack this for you?”

Stiles’ mouth fell open. “What? No. Oh my god, it was in there from when I moved back to my dad’s place. We just lucked out that Scott chose this bag to pack my stuff in.”

“For a second I thought you planned this.” Derek popped open the bottle of lube, squeezing some onto his finger.

Derek captured his lips, prying his mouth open and darting his tongue into Stiles’ mouth. His finger circled Stiles’ hole and he pushed in, not stopping until his knuckles were against Stiles’ ass.

Stiles’ head fell back onto the bed. “Oh god, Derek.”

He hadn’t done this in a long time. Becca accepted he was bisexual but they didn’t do anything like this, which was fine, but that meant it was up to him during his own time to awkwardly make it work. This was better.

Derek moved his finger in and out, dragging it down the bundle of nerves, sending sparks to the tips of Stiles’ fingers. Leisurely, he kissed Stiles, settling down on the mattress.

Stiles just enjoyed the sensation of being stretched open, he enjoyed being teased, and tortured. He liked drawing it out, it was better, the release.

Derek shoved a second finger in and Stiles clenched around his fingers, trying to get more friction.

He pulled away from the kiss. Derek’s mouth was on his neck in seconds, biting and sucking across his skin. It was almost enough to make Stiles cum right then.

It’d been too long since he’d been with someone. He and Becca hadn’t had sex in three months at the time they’d broken up. His tolerance for it was diminished, he felt like he was a teen again.

With another brush of his prostate, Stiles gasped. “Oh god, you need to get in me.” Stiles hit Derek’s arm.

Derek pulled out and grabbed the lube. “Do you want me to put on a condom?”

“You can’t even get STDs.”

“I know.”

“No, I don’t want a condom... just hurry up.”

“So bossy,” Derek smiled. He spread the lube across his dick and settled between Stiles’ legs. “Is this okay?”

“Yeah, this is good.”

Derek pushed in slowly, allowing time for Stiles to adjust. He was bigger than any guy Stiles had been with and just the sensation of being filled was enough to pull a low moan from his chest.

Derek’s arms braced around Stiles’ head, tilting his head down, kissing Stiles.

Stiles twisted his legs around Derek’s waist and pulled him in fully, his hips hitting Stiles’ ass. The feeling of being split open made all the air rush out of his chest.

“Fu-ck,” Derek stuttered.

“Just stay still for a second, it’s been a bit.” Stiles took a deep breath and ground down against Derek’s dick. He could feel every inch, it hit all the right places making the pain subside quickly.

“Two years?” Derek asked.

“Yeah, a little more than that actually,” Stiles moaned, still grinding his hips.

Derek kissed along his jaw. “I’m the first one in you after two years?”

“Yeah... does that turn you on?”

“A little,” Derek smirked.

“You can move.”

Derek slowly started moving his hips. The air mattress made things a little awkward. A little uneven. But soon he got the hang of it and moved quicker.

“Are you okay?”

“Yes, Derek, I’m fine,” Stiles gritted his teeth together.

“Are you sure?”

“I’d be better if you put some strength into it.”

Derek snapped his hips hard against Stiles’ ass, dragging a shout from Stiles.

“Oh fuck.”

Derek kept up the rough pace. Hurting in all the right ways. Stiles ran his hands over Derek’s smooth skin, trying to touch everything he could. Not knowing when he’d get the chance again.

“Stiles –” Derek buried his face in Stiles’ neck, breathing in deeply.

He held onto Derek’s thick arms, feeling the muscles working.

“I’m so close,” Stiles cried out.

“Cum for me,” Derek growled in his ear.

Stiles could feel the pressure building in his dick, he drove his hips against Derek’s hard thrusts. With a loud moan, he came harder than he’d with anyone else.

Derek pushed his hips faster, fucking Stiles through his orgasm, right as Stiles became too sensitive, warm cum filled him, Derek’s dick throbbing in his ass.

“Oh god.” Stiles exhaled, relaxing against the mattress.

His whole body felt weak and spent. It was hard to regret something that felt that good.

Derek pulled out slowly, falling to the mattress beside him.

“That’s one way to kill time during quarantine,” Stiles laughed, running his hand through his hair.

“A good way,” Derek mumbled, pulling Stiles against his body.

“Ew, we’re all sweaty. We gotta shower.”

“It’s late.”

“It’s eleven.”

“That’s late for me, ‘member I’m old?”

“Then you gotta sleep on the couch cause you’re all sweaty and covered in sex juices.”

“I can’t believe I just had sex with someone who calls it sex juices,” Derek said into Stiles' neck.

“I can’t believe I just had sex with Derek fucking Hale,” Stiles grinned.

Derek play-growled and pulled him in, kissing him sloppily.

Stiles pulled his head away, laughing. “Stop!”

“What’s wrong with having sex with Derek Hale?” Derek asked.

“Definitely nothing wrong with it, pretty incredible really.” Stiles swept his thumb across Derek’s bottom lip.

“Not so bad yourself,” Derek said softly. He nuzzled his face against Stiles’ hand before rolling off the mattress and standing up.

Stiles took the chance to take him in fully, in all his naked glory.

“Are you coming to shower?”

“Maybe I’ll just watch.” Stiles wiggled his eyebrows.

“Your choice.”

Stiles rolled off the mattress, a soft pain already settling into his lower body. His knees literally shook as he stood. He chugged a glass of water before joining Derek in the shower.

Showering with Derek was weirdly intimate. But it felt nice having Derek’s hands running all over his body, washing his limbs and hair for him. He seized the opportunity to feel Derek up and kissed him again as he swept the soap across Derek’s chest.

Stiles rubbed the towel over his head and brushed his teeth. Derek’s chest pressed against his back the whole time, he would’ve never pegged Derek for a cuddler but he should’ve known the big grumbly grump was desperate for affection.

They crawled into bed together, the air mattress forcing them together in the middle. He pressed his chest to Derek’s back, wrapping his arm over Derek’s waist and pulling the older man closer. Nuzzling his nose into where Derek’s shoulder met his neck.

“Does this fuck everything up?” Stiles whispered, a little scared of having to spend the rest of the week stuck in the apartment with Derek.

Derek’s body jostled with a shrug. “I don’t know.”

Stiles settled into the pillow, breathing in the smell of Derek’s shampoo. He passed out the quickest he had in the past year.


	4. Chapter 4

_Day Seven_

_Fuck_. He had sex with Derek.

A heavy arm pinned him to the mattress and he stared up at the plastic stars on the ceiling. Derek’s soft snores were right next to his face. The room bright with the morning sun.

It was fine. He could do this. He managed a purely sexual relationship with his friend in college. They didn’t get hurt, went their separate ways easy enough. But they had rules. Like no sleeping in the same bed and no kissing outside of sex. Rules him and Derek had already broken.

It was inevitable, that they’d end up like this. In high school, no one could get Stiles’ blood pumping the way Derek did. Whether it was arousal or anger. It all just fueled the other. But he was young. It didn’t matter if he was mature for his age and dealing with adult situations. He was too young. So, he just thought of Derek when he touched himself and that went on for years.

College he spiraled down into alcohol and sex and anything that made him forget his high school years. Somehow, he got his degree. Got a job. Met Brian at the police academy, they broke up just before they both got a job in Beacon Hills.

Then he met Becca and she was gorgeous. He did love her at the beginning even though his dad didn’t like her and Scott made a face every time he mentioned her name. They moved in after a year together. They were happy for a little while until suddenly Stiles wasn’t enough.

He saw Derek a couple times a year, hell he was pretty sure his dad saw more of Derek than he did. And they didn’t really talk. But the attraction was there, he just pushed it away. He was in a committed relationship.

The last time he saw Derek though – before meeting up with him in the rest stop parking lot – was different. Fourth of July weekend of last year. Scott decided it would be a good idea for the pack to rent an oceanfront house in a small coastal town.

“Scott, where’s the cooler with all our food?” Stiles shouted, he looked at the almost empty SUV. They’d already taken in their bags of clothes, along with the few bags of groceries.

“It’s in the back,” Scott called.

“No... it’s not.”

Scott joined him on the driveway, they looked at the all but empty car. There were a few beach toys but that was it.

“Oh shit. I took it out when we got to your place to rearrange quickly.”

“Scott!”

He texted Becca to take in the food so it didn’t go to waste but didn’t expect a reply.

Scott laughed. “I’m sorry! I’ll run out and get some more.”

Derek’s SUV pulled into the driveway and Malia jumped out of the passenger seat.

“Hey!” she grinned, pulling him into a tight hug.

“How are you?” he asked.

“Things are great,” she smiled.

Kira got out of the backseat. It still threw him off, that they ended up together. After Kira did her time in the desert or whatever, her and Malia reconnected. Scott freaked out a bit over his two exes dating. Stiles reminded him that they were just lucky everyone got along. For the most part.

Derek got out of the driver’s side looking less than pleased to be there. He was the oldest by a long shot and didn’t exactly fit in. But less and less Stiles fit in too. Everyone was settling down with people, getting engaged and married. He had Becca but more and more he questioned whether or not he wanted to stay with her.

“Hey Derek.” Scott hugged him.

Tess came out of the house. “Did someone say that the food cooler got left behind?”

“Yeah. Your fiancé left it behind in my parking lot.”

“Tess!” Malia hugged her.

Over the years, Malia had mellowed out. Learned a few social skills, became kinder. She ran a camp for underprivileged kids. Funded mostly by Derek, but Stiles wasn’t supposed to know that.

“Hey girl,” Tess said, then hugged Kira.

“Where’s Lydia and Liam?” Malia asked.

“In the house, claiming bedrooms.” Tess pulled Derek in for a hug.

Malia and Kira took off into the house.

Scott got into his car, rolling down the windows. “I’ll be back.”

“Do you need a list?” Tess asked.

“Still in my phone from last time.”

He pulled out of the driveway, leaving Tess, Derek and Stiles standing there.

“I better go make sure they don’t wreck anything in the house,” Tess grimaced. “The security deposit was a lot. I tried to convince Scott to get something less fancy, but nope, we had to come here.”

Derek opened the back of his car, grabbing out a small bag.

“How’s Cora?” Stiles asked, grabbing another bag from the trunk.

“Good. She just got engaged.”

“Oh wow, to Tom?”

“Yeah.”

“You like him?”

“He’s good for her. Keeps her level.”

“How’s Peter?”

Derek’s mouth pulled down on one side. “Who knows.”

They walked into the house. It was the most gorgeous house Stiles had ever been in.

“Wow,” Stiles gasped.

It was artfully but minimally decorated. They walked into the main area, floor to ceiling windows looking over the Pacific Ocean. The kitchen huge and all white in the way that screamed _we’re rich_. Furniture was all sharp angles and none of it looked comfortable.

“I can’t imagine living somewhere like this,” Stiles said.

“Isn’t it amazing?” Kira shouted from upstairs. “Our bedroom has a couch in it!”

“I call not with Scott and Tess!” Stiles shouted, dropping the bag on the ground and running towards the stairs.

He eventually ended up with a shared bedroom with Lydia. Her boyfriend couldn’t come, he was in his residency and working all weekend.

“Where’s Becca?” Lydia asked, as he looked out at the ocean from their window.

“Working.”

Lydia stood in just her emerald green bikini, brushing her hair in the attached bathroom. He went from so deeply in love with her, to being with her for one awkward night, to good friends. Now when he looked at her he didn’t feel any attraction at all. His younger self would’ve slapped him upside the head.

“Guess what?” Lydia’s eyes sparkled with excitement.

“What?”

She lowered her voice. “You can’t tell anyone because it’s not official yet, but the other day I was using Darren’s laptop and his search engine said he’d been looking at engagement rings.”

Stiles grinned. “Wow, you’re going to be a wifey.”

“Maybe,” Lydia smiled. “It’s not that important to me to get married but I do want to spend my life with him. It's nice to know he feels the same.”

“Yeah.” Stiles pushed off the window sill and grabbed his bathing suit.

“How about you and Becca? You’ve been together for a year.”

“We just moved in together.”

Every time he thought of proposing to her it didn’t feel right. Something told him it’d never feel right.

“I assume by that response you don’t plan on proposing anytime soon?”

Stiles shrugged. “I haven’t really thought about it. Maybe in a couple years. I’m still trying to pay off my student loans.”

“Are you happy with her?”

He fiddled with the bathing suit in his hands. “Yeah. I think so.”

“You think so?”

There was a loud bang on the door, making him and Lydia both jump. “Are you guys ready?” Scott shouted.

“Almost!” Stiles called back.

Lydia moved out of the bathroom. “You deserve to be with someone who makes you happy. Who makes you _want_ to marry them even if it won’t be for a while.”

“Can we just not talk about this?”

Stiles shut the bathroom door and changed. When he opened it again, Lydia had thrown a swimsuit cover over herself. She gave him a soft smile.

“I’m here if you decide you want to talk about it.”

They spent the rest of the day goofing around on the beach. Him and Malia jumping through the waves. Having a group game of beach volleyball. For the first time in a while he realized he was having a good time without worrying about anything.

Later, he helped Lydia and Tess make a salad.

“Damn, Derek’s like fine wine... he just gets better every year,” Lydia said quietly, looking out the window at Scott and Derek barbecuing shirtless.

The sun reflected off Derek’s golden skin. Even with his softened stomach, not quite as rock hard as when he was younger, the abs were still defined. His beard thicker than it’d been before, making him look like a rugged cowboy.

“What’s the chance Scott would agree to a threesome?” Tess joked.

The two men looked over at the window suddenly and the three of them ducked down to the ground. Lydia and Tess cackling like hens.

“They’re going to kill us,” Stiles hissed. “Also, zero percent. They’re _brothers_ remember?”

Malia and Kira walked in the kitchen. Their hair all messed up and a flush high on Kira’s cheeks.

“What are you guys doing?” Malia frowned.

“Hiding,” Lydia whispered.

“Where were you guys?” Stiles smirked.

“Taking a nap.” Malia grabbed a beer from the fridge even though she couldn’t get drunk.

“ _Sure_ ,” Tess said, standing back up.

Kira blushed. “Where is everyone?”

“Liam’s passed out on the couch, poor kid’s tuckered from the sun.” Tess chopped more lettuce. “Scott and Derek just put on the hamburgers. We were just admiring the view.”

“The ocean?” Malia asked.

“No, what do you think?” Lydia huffed and pulled Stiles back up from the floor.

"Derek, obviously," Kira said quietly.

As the four girls looked out the window, Stiles sat down at the island, grabbing his beer. Scott and Derek could probably hear them clear as day.

“I’ve never understood the attraction,” Malia said.

Tess froze with the knife on the lettuce.

Kira frowned. “I would hope you never do, he’s your cousin.”

“True.” Malia took a sip of the beer. “Remember that Stilinski,” Malia whispered in his ear before walking over to the door.

He flinched. “What does _that_ mean?” he shouted after her but she was already outside with the two guys.

“I think it means if you bang Derek you’ve banged two Hales,” Tess said.

“I’m not going to bang Derek." His cheeks on fire. 

“Try not to sound so disappointed,” Tess said. “None of us get to bang him.”

“Yeah you gotta be a pretty high level of crazy to get with Derek,” Lydia said. “You know, cause all his girlfriends have been psychotic bitches.”

They sat around the table after they were finished their food. The sun set on the ocean and the moment was perfect. Lydia set up her camera and took a group shot. She snapped a few more pictures of them around the table. Stiles pulled Derek into a headlock, licking the side of his face. He cried laughing at the look on Derek’s face when he pulled away.

“Are we all just going to keep ignoring the obvious?” Malia said.

Everyone paused and Stiles’ cheeks heated up. _Oh god._

“What’s that?” Lydia lowered her phone, side eyeing Stiles and Derek.

He glared at her.

“There’s an extra heartbeat. Has been since this afternoon.”

Stiles breathed out. Oh good. Not him and Derek. But then he froze, what did she mean by that?

Everyone looked towards Lydia.

She held up her hands. “It’s not me!”

Everyone looked at Tess. Scott wouldn’t meet any of their eyes.

“Guys?” Stiles said.

“Okay, well we weren’t planning on telling anyone yet since it’s still really earlier, but I guess we should’ve seen this coming,” Scott said, he wrapped his arm around Tess’ shoulder.

Tess smiled. “I’m two months pregnant!”

“Oh my god!” Lydia shouted.

Chaos erupted, everyone shouting over each other. Pulling in the happy couple.

Stiles teared up.

“Stiles... are you crying?” Scott said.

“No –” Stiles wiped his eyes – “just got the sun in them.”

The two of them watched the girls crowd Tess.

Stiles looked at his best friend. “I’m really happy for you guys.”

“Thanks,” Scott smiled.

Derek clapped Scott on the shoulder. “Congratulations Scott.”

Stiles threw his hands up in the air. “I’m gonna be an uncle!” Stiles shouted. He grabbed his beer and chugged the rest of it.

“Obviously you’re going to be the responsible uncle,” Scott said to Derek.

“I’m the fun uncle, the one the kid will actually want to hang out with,” Stiles grinned. He tilted his head towards Derek. “Too bad for you, you’re the boring uncle.”

Derek pushed his head away. “I’m the uncle that’ll be bailing the kid out and leaving you behind,” Derek said with a smile.

The next day Stiles and Malia cooked everyone breakfast. Kira watched them make the waffles so they didn’t burn them. As if she didn’t trust them. It was almost like Stiles had gone to visit them one time and him and Malia accidentally forgot about the bacon, creating a pretty big stovetop fire. Almost.

They got ready and headed to a nearby surf shop, renting a bunch of boards. Stiles went to UCLA and spent four years surfing. It was one sport he was actually decent at. All morning he taught Liam and Lydia. The others already knew how.

Scott brought down a plate of sandwiches and a cooler of drinks. The pack ate together on the beach. Stiles finished off the sandwich and stood up.

“Alright Derek, your turn.”

Derek looked up from his book, he hadn’t moved from the chair all day.

“My turn for what?”

“Surfing!”

“No.”

“Have you ever tried it?”

“No and I don’t plan to start now.”

“Come on...” Stiles grabbed the book from his hand.

“Stiles.” Derek stood up.

“I’ll only give it back if you try surfing.” Stiles ran away.

Derek chased after him. As he got close, Stiles threw the book over his head and Scott caught it.

“Ha. Good luck getting it back from the true alpha!” Stiles smiled.

Derek turned towards Scott and he tossed it to Liam, who tossed it to Tess.

“I’m not surfing,” Derek said.

“Come on,” Stiles whined. “All you’ve done is sit on the beach. If you’re not careful you’re gonna get all saggy.”

Derek ignored him and walked towards Tess, she tossed the book to Stiles.

He waved it around in the air. “Just half an hour, I’ll get you up on that board and you’ll never want to sit and read again.”

“Why do you care so much?” Derek asked.

Before Stiles could reply, Derek tackled him. Stiles yelped. The book flew out of his hands, the sand hot against his back as he landed with Derek's face just a couple inches from Stiles’ lips.

He exhaled a shaky breath. “I just wanted you to have fun.”

Derek’s eyes roamed his face, landing on his lips, before he realized he was still pinning Stiles to the ground. He sprung up, pulling Stiles with him.

“Fine, half an hour.”

Stiles grinned and picked up Derek’s book. “That’s all I want.”

The others were staring at them when they got back to the towels. Derek grumbled about his book being covered with sand.

Half an hour quickly turned to an hour which turned into another hour. Derek picked up surfing pretty easily, damn werewolf genes, and they just sat out in the water together.

It was peaceful, the waves rolling under them and Stiles felt the constant anxiety ease up. They didn’t talk much, not after Stiles finished teaching him, they relaxed into an easy silence.

Tess called for them. They had reservations for dinner in an hour.

Stiles’ fingers and toes were shriveled from the water. His skin felt like it had a layer of grease on it from the sun lotion and ocean salt. He needed a shower and maybe a quick nap. Between the hot sun and all the surfing, his arms and eyelids were heavy.

As he washed his hair, Lydia came in the bathroom. The shower curtain blocked her from his view.

“Am I okay to do my hair and make-up?”

“Sure.”

It fell quiet for a bit and he let the water cool down his skin.

“What’s going on with you and Derek?”

Stiles paused with the body wash in his hands. “What do you mean?”

“I mean the flirting, the amount of time you guys spend with each other when we’re all together, there’s got to be something going on.”

“He’s straight,” Stiles frowned. “And I have a girlfriend. And it’s _Derek_.”

Lydia didn’t respond so Stiles peeked out of the curtain. She looked at him in the mirror.

“He’s not straight.”

“What? Yes he is... Paige, Kate, Jennifer, Braeden, Samantha, Karly?”

Lydia snapped her make up shut and turned around, leaning on the counter. “I’ll bet you he’s not straight.”

“How much?”

“Fifty.”

“You’re on. How do we prove it?”

“You could kiss him, since you two obviously feel something for each other.”

“I’m not kissing him.”

“Then we’ll wait and see I guess.” Lydia turned back to her make up. “But you are right, you have a girlfriend and you’re lucky she’s not here to see you two.”

Stiles rolled his eyes and closed the curtain. “What, two guys can’t be close without being gay for each other?” He rubbed the soap over his body. The sticky sun lotion washing away.

“Hm. No. You and Scott are close. But you and Derek, you two have sexual tension.”

“Do I think he’s hot? Yes. If we ended up in a position where I didn’t have a girlfriend and he turned out not to be straight and was attracted to me of all people, would I have sex with him? Yeah probably. But that doesn’t mean I have feelings for him. We barely talk, he never calls me, he’s in this pack for Scott and Malia.” Stiles finished washing his body and shut off the water.

He reached his hand out for the towel, suddenly touching the soft fabric. Patting down his body and wrapping the towel around his waist. When he pulled open the curtain, Lydia was right there, her eyebrow raised.

Stiles yelped. “What the hell.”

“You’re so stupid sometimes.”

Everyone sat down at the table, leaving the last spot open beside Derek. They always did that, left a spot open beside Derek. Forcing Stiles to sit with him for every meal. They had for years. Every time their arms brushed Stiles mentally cursed his friends.

“So, I get to the vet clinic and there’s Stiles with the saw against Derek’s arm, fully prepared to cut it off,” Scott laughed.

Stiles grimaced. “I’ve never loved you more than I did in that moment.”

“Would you have actually done it though?” Malia asked.

Stiles nodded. “Probably. Derek made some threats. I was sixteen and terrified. Also, Derek made fun of me for fainting at the sight of blood. As if that’s why I would’ve fainted. Couldn't back down then though.”

“I didn’t make fun of you,” Derek said.

“Yes you did!” Stiles said.

Tess laughed. “I can’t believe I haven’t heard this story before.”

“Tess, I’ve had more than my fair share of scarring Derek moments I’ve blocked out,” Stiles said.

Derek frowned. “What do you mean by that?”

“Oh, I don’t know, maybe like the time you sent me in to the hospital and I came face to face with the alpha. Or how about the time I almost drowned because you got paralyzed?”

“I told you to leave, it’s your own fault you jumped in after me.”

“Oh, hear that guys? It’s my fault I saved Derek’s ass.” Stiles rolled his eyes and bumped his shoulder off of Derek’s. The same shoulder with the old bullet scar.

Tess shook her head. “I’m so glad I grew up in San Francisco, I can’t imagine going through the things you guys went through.”

Stiles glanced at Derek giving him a small smile.

“It wasn’t all bad,” Stiles said quietly.

“There were a lot of good times too,” Scott said. He put his arm over the back of Tess’ chair. “But it’s definitely been nicer with things calmed down.”

“How about the time I fell in a hole?” Liam said.

Stiles laughed. “Or when Scott tried to give you the Derek Hale speech.”

“The Derek Hale speech?” Derek asked.

“Yeah, y’know –” Stiles hit Derek’s shoulder. He lowered his voice, mocking Derek – “ _We’re brothers now, the bite is a gift_.”

Scott’s face went red. “I remember that, I had no idea what I was doing.”

“It all worked out by the looks of it.” Tess patted him on the knee.

Scott looked around at their group. “Yeah, it did.”

After Tess and Scott beat them for the third time in chicken wars, Lydia walked out of the ocean.

“I’m not playing anymore,” she said.

“I’m sorry Lydia!” Stiles laughed. Compared to two werewolves they couldn’t win. “Give me another chance.”

Lydia turned around, smiling. “No way, I can only lose so many times. I'm a winner Stiles.”

“Derek! Come play chicken!” Scott yelled. “Stiles needs a partner.”

“I’m good.”

Stiles really didn’t want Derek to get that up close and personal with his junk.

“Malia! Kira! Come join us, we’ll do three-way chicken wars!” Tess called.

On the beach, Malia pulled up Derek, knocking the book out of his hand.

“I don’t really feel like playing anymore,” Stiles said.

Scott splashed him. “Don’t be an ass.”

The three of them came into the water.

Malia ducked under the water so Kira could go on her shoulders.

“Bring it on bitches!” Malia cried as she stood up.

Stiles sighed, pleading with whatever great deity was watching that his body didn’t do anything embarrassing.

He put on a cocky smile, turning to Derek. “Alright, let’s do this.”

Derek didn’t look happy with the situation either, but was a good sport, ducking under the water and Stiles climbed onto his shoulders. Derek’s strong hands gripped his thighs as he stood up and Stiles had to think of anything but the feeling of Derek.

Thankfully, they weren’t like that long before the game started. Kira and Malia were vicious, Malia pushing Scott as Kira managed to hold on with just her legs pushing at Tess.

Soon Stiles got into it, cheering as Tess finally went down. They focused on Malia and Kira.

“Stiles, are you even trying?” Derek said as Stiles grabbed his face to stop from falling.

“She’s a kitsune!” Stiles yelled.

Kira laughed. “Fox recognizes fox.”

Derek moved forward, not backing away this time when Malia pushed him. Stiles wrapped his legs backwards, under Derek’s arms, squeezing tight. Derek let him go and pushed Malia with his full force as Stiles latched onto Kira and pulled her towards them. The two girls went down and Stiles threw his hands up.

“We won!” he shouted.

Malia looked unimpressed as she came out of the water.

Stiles cheered again. “You went down bitches!” Stiles shouted, pointing at Malia and Kira.

Kira just laughed.

Derek pulled his legs away and pushed him off. He fell backwards into the cool water.

“Guess we make a good team sometimes,” Stiles said as he brushed his wet hair off his face.

Derek looked away. “Guess so.”

Stiles stumbled his way out into the backyard, passing Derek on the deck.

“Stiles, where are you going?”

“The beach.” Stiles kept walking.

“You shouldn’t go to the beach alone at night when you’re drunk.”

Stiles turned around, lifting his arms into the air. “Then come with me.”

Even though he made the suggestion, he was surprised when Derek fell in step with him. They walked the beach together, the moonlight reflecting off the soft waves. The breeze hit his face, cooling down his alcohol-flushed cheeks.

When they couldn’t see the house anymore, Stiles laid down. Without the light pollution of the city, the stars were clear.

“Look at the sky!” Stiles held his hands up.

They laid beside each other.

He tilted his face towards Derek, who was already looking at him, and Stiles smiled. Derek looked happy, lying there with the moonlight reflecting off his face. Stiles reached his hand out, brushing his fingers gently across Derek’s hand. When Derek didn’t pull away, he laced their fingers together. The alcohol acting for him.

He watched a shooting star fly through the sky and in that moment felt the best he had in years. Lydia was right. Stiles did have feelings for Derek.

They weren’t as strong as they once were but they never faded completely. He thought he was better, in between the times he saw Derek, but as soon as they were together all the feelings came rushing back. Like they’d been dormant instead of gone.

But he had Becca. And Derek had Karly. And never in a million years would there be a world where him and Derek worked together.

Stiles sat up, throwing a rock towards the ocean. “Sometimes I hate being in a relationship. It’s so... claustrophobic. No that’s not the right word. Well maybe it is, y’know?” Stiles looked down at him. “Of course, you don’t. You have Karly.”

“We broke up.”

“What? When?”

“A week ago.”

“Oh dude, that sucks.”

Derek shrugged.

“Why’d you break up?”

“She wanted more, I didn’t. She realized I didn’t love her.”

“You guys were together for over a year and you didn’t love her?” Maybe he was just as fucked up as Stiles.

Derek laughed, it was strangely juxtaposed with the conversation. “Yeah.”

“Wanna know a secret?” Stiles leaned in towards Derek’s face.

“What’s that?” Derek’s gaze settled on Stiles’ lips.

“Sometimes I don’t know if I really love Becca.”

Derek’s eyes darted up, they were wide and beautifully green. Stiles reached out, tracing the skin across Derek’s cheekbone.

“You have pretty eyes.”

Derek’s lips parted.

Stiles took a chance. Lydia’s words fresh on his mind. He closed the distance between their lips, pressing gently against Derek’s. A feeling he’d never felt before surged through his body and it was overwhelming.

Derek’s hand pushed against his chest.

Stiles pulled away, cheeks burning as he realized what he’d just done.

“We can’t –”

“I know.” Stiles got up and started walking back to the house.

“Stiles, wait –” Derek grabbed his arm.

“I’m just really drunk and not having a good time with Becca right now obviously. But I love her and I shouldn’t have done that.”

Derek nodded. “It’s all good.”

When they got back to the house, the others were around the fire pit in the backyard, snuggled under blankets, roasting marshmallows. Stiles sat down next to Lydia and slumped in the chair.

“Where were you guys?” Scott asked.

“They definitely fucked.” Malia’s voice was kidding, but also slightly serious, as if it was a possibility and everyone knew it.

“Shut up,” Derek said.

“Look at the flush on Stiles’ cheeks!” Malia kicked Stiles’ leg.

Everyone looked at him and his cheeks got even warmer.

“I’m drunk.” Stiles kicked her back. “We just went for a walk.”

Lydia raised her eyebrow and he ignored her. Derek sat down next to him, the only seat left and he tried his best to ignore the sting of rejection and shame.

“Oh crap,” Scott shouted. His marshmallow ablaze and everyone’s attention got pulled from Stiles and Derek.

The waves crashed against the beach, the sound drifting in through the open window of their room. Lydia crawled up into his bunk, snuggling against the side of his body. She smelled like beer and campfire.

“Would Darren be okay with this?” Stiles asked.

“No, neither would Becca. They don’t understand us.” Lydia wrapped her arm around his chest. “What happened on the beach?”

Stiles wrapped his arm around her back. “You can never, ever tell anyone,” Stiles whispered. “And when I tell you, you can’t react super loudly.”

“I won’t, I promise,” Lydia giggled.

“I kissed Derek.”

“What?” Lydia sprung up. She slapped her hand over her mouth and laid back down. “Sorry, what?” she whispered.

“I told him that I don’t think I love Becca and he was looking at me in this way I’ve never seen him look at me before and then I kissed him.”

“You owe me fifty dollars!”

“No, I don’t.” He was actually bitter over that fact. “Because he didn’t kiss me back, he pushed me away.”

Lydia moved so she was lying on his chest but looking up at him. She traced her fingers over the letters on his police academy t-shirt. “Really? I was so sure.”

“I’m so embarrassed, how can I face him in the morning?”

“Just pretend you were really drunk and you don’t remember it.”

“That’s actually a good idea.”

“I can’t believe he didn’t kiss you back.”

“I can’t believe I let you talk me into it.”

“What about Karly?” Lydia gasped. “What about Becca?”

“He’s not with Karly anymore and I’m never telling anyone about this. I’m going home and making a real go of things with Becca.”

“If that’s what you want.”

“That’s what I want,” Stiles lied. “Even if I wanted differently it’s not going to happen.”

Lydia settled back down into his shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

“Shit happens,” Stiles shrugged.

“I’m glad we had shitty sex and now we can be best friends,” Lydia said quietly.

“Me too.”

They fell asleep together in Stiles’ bunk.

The next morning, he packed his bags and showered before leaving the room. Putting it off as long as he could. Of course, the first person he ran into was Derek.

“Oh hey.” Stiles rubbed the back of his neck. The embarrassment rushing back and he tried to push it away before Derek could notice it.

“Stiles, about last night –”

“What about it? I was pretty wasted. Oh man, did I strip again?” He tried playing it off, hoping Derek couldn’t detect the dishonesty. “Becca usually cuts me off after five drinks because I always think clothing is strangling me.”

“I uh –” Derek gave him a weird look – “no, it’s nothing.”

“Alright.” Stiles walked away.

There was a good chance Derek knew he was lying. But at least he seemed to get the message that Stiles didn’t want to talk about it and was hoping they’d just forget about it.

Now here they were. Eight months later, in Derek’s apartment, the morning after having sex.

Stiles tried to slide out from under Derek’s arm without waking him. Derek stirred. Groaning and turning onto his other side. Stiles got up as gracefully as he could from the air mattress.

He locked himself in the bathroom.

Just pretend like everything was normal. Like having sex with Derek was normal and that it didn’t change anything. He didn’t even entertain the idea of something more. The closest thing to heartbreak he had ever experienced was Derek’s rejection on the beach.

Not that he was in love with Derek.

Because that was ridiculous, he barely knew the man really. So, they saved each other’s lives a few times, that was a long time ago. Now they lived pretty separated lives.

“Stiles?” Derek’s voice was thick with sleep.

Stiles stood up from the stool, swallowing his bite of food. “Hey, I have breakfast for you too, I was trying to keep it warm.”

Derek rubbed his face and Stiles tried not to think about how cute he looked with his hair all tufted up and eyes heavy with sleep.

“What time is it?”

“Almost eleven.”

Derek sat up. “I don’t think I’ve slept in this late since I was in high school.”

Stiles moved around the counter to the oven and grabbed out the ceramic pan. “I guess you were tired.” He turned off the oven and opened the lid. “I made pancakes.”

“How long have you been awake?” Derek rolled out of bed and pulled on his underwear from the day before.

“Like an hour?”

He clicked the power button on the coffee machine so it'd start to brew.

Derek sat down at the counter. “This is a nice change.”

Stiles dished out a plate for Derek and put it in front of him.

“Well if you didn’t get up so goddamn early then I’d be able to make breakfast more often.”

He walked around the counter to sit back down but Derek grabbed him and dragged him in.

“Morning.” He pressed his lips to Stiles’ briefly, smiling as he pulled away.

Stiles smiled back, his heart racing. He didn’t know what to do. All his casual hook ups in the past had been with strangers, or almost strangers. They were never someone he had history with and so much of it at that.

“Are you okay?” Derek asked.

Stiles nodded, moving away from Derek and sitting back down.

“Your heart is racing. Even more than normal.”

Stiles stabbed the pancake on his plate. “Just didn’t know how you were going to react once daylight hit the situation.”

“You can relax, we’re okay.”

“Okay, as long as everything’s good, cause we still have a long time to go on this quarantine and if everything’s not good then that’ll definitely be awkward and I don’t do well in awkward situations.”

Derek chuckled. “Everything’s good... and I’m sure we can think of some ways to put in the rest of the time,” Derek said with a smirk.

Stiles almost choked on his pancake. “I – uh – yeah.”

When they cleaned up from breakfast, it was different. Derek’s hand landed on his lower back once in a while. Stiles didn’t jerk away when his body accidentally brushed across Derek’s back in the small kitchen. They worked together better than before, hands grazing each other as Stiles handed him the rinsed plates.

Derek came out of the bathroom, freshly showered, in just his towel. Stiles followed him into his room.

“What are you doing?” Derek asked, holding the towel tight to his waist.

Stiles leaned against the doorframe. “Hoping that I get to see you naked again.”

“Would it involve you being naked again?”

“I mean... yeah. If you want that.”

Derek crossed the room, pulling Stiles in against his damp skin. “Definitely.”

Stiles grinned, he grabbed the towel, pulling it loose and pushing Derek back towards the bed. “I always think you can’t get hotter. That it’s not possible. Then you show up and there you are. More attractive every goddamn time.”

Derek fell backwards on the bed, pulling Stiles down with him. “Like fine wine. I heard.”

Stiles laughed. “That was Lydia. I definitely wasn’t objectifying you at all.”

Derek rolled them over, pressing his weight against Stiles. He dragged his hand up Stiles’ thigh and under his shirt. “Let me suck you off,” he whispered, his hot breath hitting Stiles’ ear.

“You have my permission to do that whenever you want. Like seriously whenever.” Stiles moaned as Derek dragged his pants down off his hips.

Stiles climbed back into the bed with snacks and a game Scott had picked up for him.

“What’s this?” Derek picked up the game. “Codenames Duet?”

“We have to work together. Can you manage that?”

“So far, our cooperation has resulted in happy endings.” Derek shot him a goofy smile.

Stiles laughed. “ _Very_ happy endings.”

He didn’t think he’d ever be content to sit in bed and play board games for an afternoon, but with Derek it was actually fun. Even though they ended up bickering over the instructions and Derek told him that he was the worst partner to play games with.

After a long round of the game, Stiles pushed it away and grabbed another game Scott got.

“You got Scott to buy you board games, Nerf guns, and fake stars.”

“I also got one of those door net things.”

Derek stared at him blankly.

“You know, with the little basketball?”

Stiles pretended to shoot a ball into an imaginary net. Dropping his hands when Derek gave him a confused look.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Stiles got up and grabbed the toy from the bag on the kitchen counter. He ripped it out of its packaging and hung it on the back of Derek’s bedroom door.

He handed Derek the small basketball. “Now you just try and get it in.”

Derek looked at the basketball in his hands and then at the net on the door. He took a shot and it went in.

Stiles grabbed the ball and handed it back to Derek.

“You just do this repeatedly?”

“Yeah,” Stiles shrugged, lying back on the bed.

Derek shot again, getting it through the basket.

“It’s not fun when one of us has werewolf abilities.”

“I don’t think this is very hard for anyone.”

Stiles got up and grabbed the ball, sitting next to Derek on the bed. He threw the ball and it hit the rim of the basket, bouncing away.

“Did you do that to prove me wrong?” Derek asked.

Stiles laughed. “No, I’m just that skilled.”

“You just have a different set of skills.” Derek leaned over, pulling Stiles into a kiss.

The day progressed in the same fashion. They played games, Stiles sketched, Derek read. It always led back to them abandoning whatever they were doing to make out and roll around in the sheets. Making up for lost time. Werewolf stamina was a beautiful thing.

At bedtime, Stiles stood in the living room staring at the air mattress. He didn’t know the protocol. Not wanting to sleep alone but also, he didn’t want to get attached. If Derek even wanted him to sleep in his bed.

“Stiles?”

He turned around and Derek was standing in the hallway.

“Are you coming to bed?” Derek asked.

“With you... in your bed?”

“Yeah, the paint smell is bearable now.”

Stiles looked back at the air mattress. What the hell. Why start making good decisions now?

“Yeah, I’m coming,” Stiles said.

They crawled into the cool sheets and Stiles moved closer to Derek, seeking out his warmth.

“You alright?” Derek asked quietly.

Stiles settled his head on Derek’s chest. “Yeah.”

Already feeling his heart breaking.


	5. Chapter 5

_Day Eight_

Stiles woke up to an empty bed. Derek’s side was ruffled but cold, he’d been up for a while. Stiles rolled onto his back, running his hand through his hair.

Yesterday didn’t feel real, none of it felt real. There wasn’t a world where someone like Derek was attracted to someone like him. But here he was, naked in Derek’s bed.

Stiles got out of bed and pulled on his underwear and t-shirt from yesterday. He picked up their clothes folding them and putting them on the end of the bed. Grabbing his phone, he went into the bathroom.

There was a text from Becca. Sent early that morning while he was still sleeping. With regret for not blocking her number, he opened the text.

_Hi Stiles, hope things are well with you. I’m wondering if I can come by and pick up the blender? I forgot to pack it._

Stiles scoffed. After a year of cheating on him and she wanted the twenty-dollar blender back. It was sitting in a box at his dad’s along with a few other things she’d left behind. He was going to drop it off to her at some point but then landed in quarantine before he could.

Instead of texting back something rude, Stiles decided to be the bigger person. Out of the two of them, Stiles was the one that lucked out.

Her co-worker was nothing special, Stiles had met him once before, he was a frat boy from California State, and Stiles wished them all the happiness in their mediocre life. Stiles texted back telling her that he wouldn’t be around for another week but that he’ll text her when he’s back to work and she could pick it up from there.

There was a text from Scott, checking in. He did most mornings, still harbouring a bit of guilt over getting Stiles into the situation.

He contemplated telling Scott about Derek. He usually told Scott everything, _except_ things about Derek. Scott didn’t even know about Stiles’ longstanding crush or their awkward kiss on the beach. The only one who knew about any of that was Lydia. Maybe he should text her. But she’d want to talk on the phone and she’d ask a lot of questions he didn’t have the answers to.

Stiles just replied that they were doing fine and getting along. Which wasn’t a lie. He just omitted exactly how well they were getting along.

He washed his hands and splashed some water on his face, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. Tossing his phone back on the bed, he finally made his way out to the kitchen.

Derek was making breakfast in his underwear. Soft music played from the speaker and Stiles couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face.

“Morning.” Derek flipped the bacon.

“Mm. I could get used to this.” Stiles wrapped his arms around Derek’s waist, leaning his chin on Derek’s shoulder.

The bacon spit, hitting Stiles’ arm. “Ow!” He pulled away from Derek. “How do you cook bacon shirtless?”

Derek shrugged. “I don’t really feel it... my body heals too quickly.”

Stiles picked a strawberry out of the fruit salad, popping it in his mouth. “What’s on the agenda for today?”

“I still have to put together the dresser and side tables.”

Stiles leaned his head back, releasing a moan. “I don’t think I’m emotionally prepared to deal with that today.”

“Other than that, I’m done the apartment.”

“It looks really good.”

“You could finally learn how to play something other than Crazy Eights.”

Stiles pouted. “That’s boring.” He poured himself a glass of water from the fridge. “I’m not made for the quarantine life.”

Derek put the bacon on a plate. “What else do you want with this?”

“Maybe just half a bagel? I’m not that hungry.”

“You? Not hungry?”

Becca’s text had spoiled the mood.

Stiles shrugged. “It happens sometimes. Rarely.”

They ate breakfast out on the balcony in the warm sun.

“Got a text from Becca this morning,” Stiles said, watching a couple of crows fight over a piece of garbage in the parking lot.

Derek looked over at him. “Yeah?”

“Wants her blender back.”

“Wow.”

“Yup... I mean not that I need an apology, but it’d be kind of nice y’know? When I walked in on them, she didn’t even say a panicked “I’m sorry”, you know what she said instead? _You’re supposed to be at work_.”

Derek let out a breath. “That’s pretty shitty.”

“Eh, it’s like you said. Deep down I knew... just didn’t want to admit it. I wasn’t fair to her either because I really wasn’t invested in the relationship. To be honest, a lot of the time I didn’t even like Becca. But man, it was some crazy good sex.” 

“Want to know the truth?”

“What’s that?” Stiles took a bite of his bagel.

“I never liked her,” Derek said. “Brian treated you better.”

Stiles laughed. “Funny, Scott and Tess said the same thing when I told them what happened.”

“Yeah, we may have discussed Becca when you first brought her around,” Derek smiled. “Tess does a pretty good impression.”

“I can imagine.” Stiles shifted in his seat, facing Derek. “Do you guys spend a lot of time talking about me?”

Derek blushed and looked down at his plate. “No, not really.”

“You three are the biggest gossips of the pack.”

“You and Lydia?” Derek raised an eyebrow.

“We discuss what people are up to... we like to know about our friends’ lives.”

“Whatever makes you feel better.”

Stiles picked at his food. “Do you guys have dinner together often?”

“Are you jealous?”

He could feel Derek's eyes watching him.

“A little. I’m an OG pack member... just wondering why I never get the invite.”

“You have dinner with them all the time.”

“Yeah but not when you’re there.”

“Oh so, you miss me.” Derek leaned in.

Stiles didn’t back down, leaning in too. “Yeah, sometimes I do dumbass.”

“I’ll make sure you get an invite next time.”

“You better.” Stiles licked his lips, the sweet taste of fruit on his tongue.

Derek followed the motion with his eyes before pulling Stiles in, his hand on the back of Stiles’ head.

Stiles did the dishes. Well he tried to do the dishes while Derek kissed and bit his way up Stiles’ shoulder, across his neck, to his jaw. He barely let Stiles finish before dragging him to the couch.

“Mm. We should brush our teeth –” Stiles moaned as Derek grabbed him through his underwear – “morning breath.”

Derek planted a kiss against his mouth.

Stiles scrunched his nose up. “Coffee breath.”

Derek chuckled softly, standing up and holding out his hand. They brushed their teeth standing side by side, smiling at each other like idiots through the mirror. As soon as they were done Derek lifted Stiles onto the counter.

Pulling off his shirt and kissing him. Stiles laid his arms around Derek’s shoulders and wrapped his legs around his waist.

“Want to jerk each other off in the shower?” Stiles asked as Derek dragged his nose against Stiles' neck.

Always with the neck. _I’m going to rip your throat out with my teeth._ Maybe he had some weird neck kink.

Derek switched on the shower, pulling off his underwear. Being naked around each other was normal already.

“What’re you doing?” Derek cocked a smile, stepping into the glass shower.

“Just admiring the view,” Stiles said. He jumped off the counter and peeled off his underwear, following Derek into the shower. “Ow, what the fuck, do you not realize the water is like lava?”

Derek laughed, turning down the temperature.

He pressed Derek against the tiled wall and wrapped a soapy hand around his dick.

“Stiles, oh fuck –” Derek leaned his head back against the wall.

“Are you going to touch me or are you going to just stand there?”

Derek smirked, grabbing Stiles’ ass and pulling him closer. “I want to fuck you again,” Derek said as he grabbed Stiles’ dick.

His brain short circuited at the bluntness of Derek’s words. The day before was all blowjobs and hand-jobs, not that Stiles was complaining. But getting fucked was what he enjoyed the most and he’d never turn it down.

With the suggestion, it was all he could think about, he’d never had shower sex like that, the condom issue made it almost impossible. With Derek and not needing one, it was possible and so hot.

“You can do that,” Stiles said. “I want you to do that.”

Derek looked at him. “Yeah?”

Stiles nodded. “Go grab the lube and give me like two minutes?”

Derek washed the soap off himself, planting a kiss to Stiles’ mouth and squeezing his ass. He got out and wrapped a towel around his waist before leaving the bathroom.

Stiles washed himself quickly but thoroughly and waited for Derek’s return.

There was a soft knock on the door.

“You can come in.”

Derek let the towel fall to the ground and stepped in the shower.

They kissed under the hot water. Stiles couldn’t believe the feeling of his body against Derek’s. The way Derek touched him made his skin feel like more than just skin. He was suddenly aware of all the nerve endings in his body, sparking like electricity underneath his skin. Eventually, they got back on track and Derek spun him around, pressing his chest against the shower wall, taking what he wanted.

“No,” Stiles shouted. He shot the Nerf gun at Derek. “Unacceptable, go change.”

Derek looked down at his body. “What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?”

“Jeans? We’re quarantined, you shouldn’t be wearing jeans.”

“What else am I supposed to wear?”

“Sweatpants, pajamas, underwear, anything but jeans you freak.”

Derek made a displeased face but turned around, walking into his room. When he came back out he was wearing his green plaid pajama bottoms and an old t-shirt.

“Better?”

“Much.” Stiles put the cookies in the oven and set the timer.

Derek laid down on the couch and turned on the TV. Stiles sat at the counter, playing another round of the game against Tess. She was kicking his ass again.

“Are you going to join me?” Derek asked.

“I will once the cookies are done.”

The timer went off a couple minutes later and Stiles pulled the cookies out of the oven. He tried to eat one.

“Ow fuck!” Stiles shouted, breathing the hot air from the cookie out.

“Did you just eat a cookie straight from the oven?”

“No,” Stiles said.

He put the rest on a plate and walked over to Derek, placing the cookies down on the coffee table.

“I’m not watching this,” Stiles said as he laid down on top of Derek.

“It’s just a nature documentary.”

“Yeah, equally part boring and part heartbreaking. There’s no winners! If the predator doesn’t catch the prey, they starve, if the predator catches the prey then the prey dies.”

“You’re a cop... you watch _crime_ shows.”

“Yeah but animals are different.”

Derek sighed and put on a different earth documentary. “This one doesn’t have any death.”

“Still boring.”

“Because the reality shows you watch are so thrilling.” Derek wrapped his arms around Stiles’ back, holding him close.

Stiles settled into Derek’s chest, breathing in the scent of his laundry detergent and shampoo, and the smell of Derek. “You’re comfy.”

Derek held him tighter in response, pressing his lips against the top of Stiles’ head.

“Do you think we would’ve been friends if we met in high school?” Stiles asked. His head moving with the rise and fall of Derek’s chest.

“If we were both in high school at the same time?”

“Yeah.”

“I don’t know. I was pretty popular.”

“You’re an ass.” Stiles moved his arm across Derek’s chest and settled his chin on top so he could see Derek’s face. “Peter said you were a lot like Scott... Scott was and is my best friend.”

“I... guess I was kind of like Scott. More cocky and naïve than I care to admit though.”

Stiles absently traced a pattern on Derek’s chest.

“I’m glad I get to know this Derek,” Stiles said quietly.

“This Derek?”

Stiles nodded. “When we met you were all angry and sharp edges. But now you’re soft and friendly and I like this Derek much better.”

Derek cupped his cheek and ran his thumb over Stiles’ lips.

“I’m glad I got to know you... that for some reason you and Scott never gave up on me.”

“Like we had much of a choice,” Stiles said. Smiling against Derek’s thumb. “Like I had much of a choice,” he whispered and laid his head back down on Derek’s chest.

They fell back into the comfortable silence and watched the vivid images of the rainforest play across the TV as the rain beat against the window. And it was almost like his dream.

_Day Nine_

“I’m human Derek, not breakable.” Stiles groaned pushing back against his dick. “Am I going to have to tell you this every goddamn time?”

“You’re mouthy –” Derek smacked his ass and Stiles moaned loudly, clenching around Derek’s dick – “Oh –”

Stiles bucked his hips. “Do that again.”

Derek hit him again with more intent this time. The sharp sting mixed with the waves of pleasure being driven through his body with every thrust.

Derek finally gave in, holding his hips and fucking him the way he wanted.

“Oh fuck, oh –” Stiles shouted. “Yes, just like that, oh god, Derek –”

Derek smacked his ass again and Stiles almost came right then. But Derek pulled out.

Stiles looked over his shoulder. “What’s wrong?”

Derek pushed Stiles onto his back, pushing Stiles’ legs up, basically folding him in half before he pushed back in.

Derek swallowed all his moans, licking into Stiles’ mouth. He wrapped a hand around Stiles’ dick as he started thrusting hard. His body felt like it was on fire and he met Derek’s hips, wrapping his hands around the back of Derek’s neck.

Stiles ripped his mouth away from Derek’s, cumming with a loud shout, Derek’s name on his lips.

Derek fucked him through his orgasm and let go of his dick. Pumping his hips only a couple times before he finished, burying his face into Stiles’ neck.

He let Stiles’ legs go. They laid together catching their breaths. After Derek went soft he pulled out, but stayed on top of Stiles, pressing him into the bed with his weight.

“Much better,” Stiles breathed out.

Derek looked up at him. “I’m just worried about hurting you.”

“You won’t, I’m not as fragile as I look.”

Derek kissed his arm. “You don’t look fragile. Not anymore.”

“You’re doing it all wrong,” Stiles said.

Derek looked up from the instructions. “You said that when I was making the bookshelf. Which turned out fine. Along with the bedframe.”

“Yeah well now you’re definitely doing it wrong, look at mine and then look at yours.”

Stiles was building one side table while Derek built the other. They were both sitting on the floor of Derek’s bedroom in their underwear. Clothing mostly just obsolete at this point.

“They look the same.”

“The legs on yours are on the wrong side. When you slide in the drawer it’ll be upside down.”

Derek looked at the instructions and closer at the table. “No, because you just flip it over.”

“Fine, whatever, you do it your way and I’ll do it mine.”

“That’s perfectly fine with me.”

Stiles screwed in the last leg and stood up. He picked up the finished side table and moved it over beside the bed. Sliding in the drawer, he stood back. “Ta-da!”

Derek flipped his over and slid in the drawer, but it wouldn’t go. He flipped the drawer upside down and it slid in perfectly.

“I fucking told you!” Stiles laughed.

Derek glared at him, clambering to his feet. He tackled Stiles onto the bed at inhuman speed, holding Stiles’ wrists above his head. Stiles’ breaths were rough with the sudden change, the pressure on his wrists hurt in the best way.

“Are you going to punish me for being right?” Stiles thrusted his hips up.

“Yes.” Derek dipped his head, breathing in Stiles’ scent in the dip of his neck before sucking on the skin.

Stiles squirmed. “Stop! I can’t go back to my dad’s covered with hickeys. I already have one.”

Derek made a low noise in the back of his throat, but moved his mouth away. He made quick work of getting Stiles’ underwear off and his mouth around Stiles’ dick.

“Hey dad!” Stiles had pulled the hood up on his sweater, hoping the hickey on his neck wasn’t visible.

“How are you?” His dad was chopping vegetables, the phone propped up against something.

“I’m good, whatcha making?”

“Some soup for dinner, Marie’s sick.” His dad looked up at him. “Don’t worry, it’s not the virus. Just a little stomach bug.”

“Oh good... I think we’re going to have homemade pizza for dinner.”

“We used to do that every Sunday with your mom.”

“I know,” Stiles said with a smile. “But Derek doesn’t have any pineapple.”

“It doesn’t belong on pizza,” his dad said.

Derek laughed. That’s what he’d told Stiles.

“Oh, is Derek there?”

“Yeah.” Stiles moved around on the couch so his dad could see Derek.

“Hey Derek.” His dad put down the knife. “Stiles isn’t bothering you too much?”

Derek’s cheeks went red, probably the memories of being buried deep in Stiles just a couple hours earlier coming to mind.

“No, he isn’t –” Derek cleared his throat – “the reality shows he watches though...”

“I told him they’re horrible. Don’t know what he gets out of watching them.”

“Delight over how stupid people are,” Stiles said.

“Did you hear about the missing persons case you were on?” his dad asked.

“Yeah, Brian told me that you guys found the woman in the woods. I let Scott know, he said he was going to check it out.”

“I’ve seen some weird crap over the years, but this was something else.” His dad shuddered and resumed chopping vegetables. “I hope it’s something supernatural because if it’s not, then that leaves me with little hope for humans.”

“I’m sure she’s just an out-of-control werewolf or something. I wouldn’t worry too much about it,” Stiles said. He started moving his head to Derek’s shoulder but caught himself, he sat up straighter. “Are you planning on going back to work after your two weeks of vacation?”

“Yeah, I can only let Parrish run things for so long,” his dad said. “Though it’s a good time to see what he’d be like as sheriff. Oh, I think I hear Marie up from her nap, I should go check on her. It was good seeing you two.”

“Okay, love you dad.”

“Love you too, talk to you later.” His dad hung up.

Stiles let out a breath and sagged onto Derek’s shoulder. “That was weirdly awkward.”

“Try being me, I’m the one fucking his son.”

“Actually, my dad might not mind this.” Stiles traced his finger on Derek’s leg. “He doesn’t usually like the people I bring home to meet him, but he seems to like you.”

“This?”

“Yeah, like if we were in a bring-you-home-to-my-dad kind of situation. He probably wouldn’t give me that disapproving look he gave with Dean and then again with Becca.”

“How about Brian?”

“My dad never officially met him as my boyfriend, Brian was way too nervous about the whole thing. But I’m sure he would’ve found a reason to disapprove.”

“But you think he’d approve of me?”

“Yeah, it’s weird considering you’ve literally been a murder suspect... but my dad seems to have this soft spot for Derek Hale. Same with Marie.” Stiles patted his knee. “Anyways I’m starving, can we make pizza now?”

Derek took a second too long to reply and Stiles thought maybe he said something he shouldn’t have.

But then Derek nodded. “Yeah we can do that.”

_Day Ten_

There was a knock on the door and Stiles pulled away from their kiss. Frowning at Derek.

“Were we expecting someone?”

Derek’s eyes went wide. “It’s Scott.”

Stiles scrambled up, smoothing out his clothes, as Derek pulled on his shirt, sitting up on the couch.

He swung the door open and grinned at Scott. “Scotty boy!” He threw his hands in the air, thankful to see another person. “What a nice surprise.”

Scott’s eyes widened. “Oh my god, you guys had sex.”

Stiles dropped his arms. “What?”

“Don’t even try to act like you didn’t, you have a giant hickey.”

A door slammed shut, Stiles glanced behind them and Derek was gone from the couch.

Scott peered around Stiles. “I know you can hear me Derek! If you hurt him I’m going to hurt you!”

“Oh my god, Scott shut up.” Stiles pushed Scott back into the hall.

He looked pointedly at Stiles. “Well...”

Stiles glanced back at Derek’s bedroom, lowering his voice. “Yeah, okay, we lasted a total of six days without sex.”

“You’ve been having sex for _four_ days now?”

“What else is there to do?”

“Um anything but have sex? What does it mean?”

“That we’re two consenting adults so we can have sex if we want it.”

“But –”

“I’m not talking about this right now, alright? Just leave it alone.” Stiles looked down at the bag in Scott’s hands. “Not that I’m not happy to see you, but why are you here?”

“I’m on my way to work, thought I’d drop by to see how you guys were doing. Tess made you guys some muffins –” Scott handed him the bag he was holding – “your dad’s doing well, I just brought him some groceries.”

“Thanks, how’s your mom with all this?”

“Well the hospital is already low on PPE so they’re not even using it in situations they normally would. She’s thinking about quarantining herself from Chris. Your dad’s been babysitting Olivia for us. This whole thing is going to get a lot worse before it gets better.”

“Yeah, I have to say I totally thought this was another swine flu, Ebola, Zika virus kind of situation. I didn’t expect us to be quarantining three months later.”

“It’s crazy... my school is trying to shut down the internship program, which would really suck because I can’t get sick but can’t exactly tell them that. And we’re so tight for money, I need to get through my specialist program as soon as I can so I can start making real money.”

“That really sucks, what does Deaton think of it?”

“He’s bumped my hours. Been staying home more, giving me more appointments to protect himself but also to give me more of a chance to make money,” Scott shrugged.

“I wish I could help more.” Stiles hung his head. “I feel useless being cooped up in here.”

“Sounds like you’re not having the worst time.”

Stiles leaned in. “Best sex I’ve ever had Scott,” he whispered.

Scott’s nose scrunched up. “Oh god. I don’t need details. It’s _Derek_ you’re sleeping with. You’re both like brothers to me... It’s like my _brothers_ are boning.”

Stiles frowned. “Good thing I never got that close with Derek.”

After Scott left, Stiles opened the container, grabbing out a muffin. The bedroom door creaked open and he could feel Derek watching him as he spread butter across the muffin.

When he turned around, Derek was leaning on the kitchen counter.

His eyebrow quirked up. “Best sex you’ve ever had?”

Stiles cheeks burned. “Don’t let it go to your head, most of the sex I’ve had I was drunk out of my mind for.”

Even though it wasn’t a lie, it came out like one.

“That’s a little sad.”

Stiles shrugged. “I was a little sad, for a while there.”

Derek moved around the counter and gently cupped his cheek. “And now?”

“Locked in an apartment with the hottest guy I’ve ever met and nothing to do but have sex? Definitely better.”

Derek pushed him against the fridge and put his hands on Stiles’ waistband. Stiles placed the muffin back on the counter. Dragging Stiles’ pants down, Derek dropped to his knees. Stiles leaned his head back and sunk his hand into Derek’s hair.

He got a text from Scott. _What does it mean?_

He looked over at Derek on the end of the couch reading his book. Stiles’ feet were in his lap, he mindlessly rubbed Stiles’ shin with one hand.

_I don’t know, we don’t talk about it._

_Do you have feelings for him?_

_I don’t know._

He had feelings for Derek, probably not in the way Scott meant though. Did he have a warm-fuzzy feeling in his heart for Derek that he hadn't had for anyone else? Yeah. That didn't mean he wanted to be in a relationship with the man. Not only was Derek rarely around enough for them to even have a functioning relationship, but also did he want to spend his Friday nights going to Olive Garden and passing out on the couch at nine p.m.? No. He had too much of that with Becca and clearly that didn't work out. He was done with relationships for a while.

_Stiles._

_Scott._

_I warned him not to hurt you, but I’m worried it might be the other way around. Does he know you’re heartless?_

_Ha. He’s just as heartless._

_It’s Derek... all he has is heart. Maybe the reason it’s the best sex you’ve ever had is because you actually have feelings for him?_

_I can’t see a world where Derek and I work. I think our sex is so great because we don’t work._

_Tess thinks you guys work._

_You told her?!_

_She’s sitting right next to me._

_Scott!_

_Stiles!_

“Who are you texting?” Derek was staring at him.

“Oh uh, just my dad.” Stiles gave him a smile. “Y’know, checking in.”

“That’s a lie.”

Stiles sighed. “I’m texting Scott... and apparently Tess too.”

Derek lowered his book.

“He wants you to know that I’m heartless,” Stiles said.

“I already know that. Why does he want me to know?”

Stiles threw his phone onto the coffee table and straddled Derek’s lap.

“He says you’re all heart.” Stiles wrapped his arms around Derek’s neck. He kissed Derek, rolling his hips down, grinding their bodies together.

Derek dropped his book and grabbed Stiles’ ass, pulling him down. They sat there just kissing for a while. It was weird, to enjoy kissing so much. Usually for Stiles it was just a part of foreplay, a bit of kissing before getting to the sex part. But with Derek it made his insides all warm and gooey, made it feel like more than just two people smushing their lips together. Maybe he did have relationship feelings. Or maybe it was the ten days of quarantine going to his head.

“I think we should fuck,” Stiles whispered in Derek’s ear, kissing his neck where he’d recently learned drove Derek crazy. He sucked on the skin. The hickey disappearing just as quickly as it showed up.

“Are you okay to do that?”

“Mm. Yes.” Stiles drove his hips down. “We should definitely fuck.”

Derek stood up, holding Stiles in his arms. They crashed into the bedroom doorway, frantically trying to stay kissing and take off each other’s clothes. Even though Derek had sucked him off that morning, he was desperate for it again.

Finally, they got to the bed and Stiles pulled off Derek’s shirt before he rolled them over, straddling Derek.

Some days he liked to be fucked, held down, and just taken. Others he liked to be in charge, he held the person down and took what he wanted.

Ridding them of their clothes, Stiles worked himself open while straddling Derek.

“You’re so hot." Derek watched him, wrapping a hot hand around Stiles' dick.

Stiles cocked a smile. “Not so bad yourself.” He moaned as he hit his prostate. He worked another finger into himself and jerked his ass back against his hand.

“Stiles... fuck –”

Stiles pulled his fingers out, knocking Derek’s hand away from his dick. He eased onto Derek, the position made Derek go deeper than before. Pain flared up his lower back, he was still a bit sore from yesterday but he craved that dull ache. He was a sucker for punishment.

He kept his gaze on Derek’s face as he slowly lifted his hips and sunk back down. Derek went to sit up, to gain some advantage, some control. Stiles splayed his hand in the middle of Derek’s chest, the muscles pulling under his hand, he gave a strong push, Derek fell back against the mattress.

“My turn to be in control.” Stiles grinned. He let out a low whine as he shifted the angle, hitting his prostate. “Oh my god.”

Driving Derek into him again and again. Derek rubbed his hands up Stiles’ thighs, watching him with a little bit of awe in his eyes. Stiles moved faster, settling into a steady rhythm, a stream of moans fell from his mouth. It scared him how good it felt. Being with Derek was addictive.

“Stiles,” Derek growled low and strangled. He looked like he was trying hard to hold on as Stiles fucked him.

“Yes?” Stiles was cocky with the knowledge that he was the one making Derek like that.

Derek grabbed Stiles’ hips, his claws digging into Stiles’ skin but not enough to draw blood. His eyes flashed blue as he let out a broken cry, his hips thrusting upwards. Derek filled him as his dick pulsed, pushing waves of arousal through Stiles.

He slowed to a stop, a little shocked. Derek never finished first.

“Sorry.” Derek covered his eyes with his hands, the claws gone.

“Don’t apologize.” Stiles grabbed Derek’s wrists, pulling them away from his face. “That was really hot.”

Derek looked sheepish.

Stiles pulled off of Derek, the cum leaking out as he laid down.

Derek didn’t waste any time as he rolled onto his knees, settling between Stiles’ legs. Stiles breath hitched as Derek pushed three fingers into Stiles and it took no time at all to get him off.

Stiles rolled out of the bed as Derek slept, he looked so peaceful with the covers pulled up to his waist and his arm thrown above his head. Stiles picked up some clothes before slipping out of the room.

He showered, leaning his head against the glass door. He didn’t know how much longer they could go on like this.

As much as he enjoyed everything they’d become over the past week and a half. He couldn’t get involved. Not that Derek wanted that. But even if he did, Stiles would end up with his heartbroken when Derek realized he deserved more. Or even worse, he’d break Derek’s heart when Stiles inevitably fucked up.

He shut off the water and patted his body dry, pulling Derek’s old crewneck sweater over his head. It hung a bit loose on Stiles and smelled like Derek's laundry detergent.

He grabbed a muffin and glass of water, sitting out on the balcony. The air was cool, especially when he was just in his underwear, but it made his head clearer.

Taking a deep breath, he shot off a text to Lydia.

_I guess I owe you fifty bucks._

He needed real advice. Scott believed in romance and fairytales. Lydia was a little more levelheaded, he went to her for real life advice.

He didn’t wait long until his phone lit up with a call.

“Hey,” he whispered.

“Why are you whispering?”

“I’m quarantined with Derek, he might hear me.”

“What? Why are you quarantined?”

“I went to Mexico for Scott... Derek came along and when we got back the travel quarantine was mandatory.”

“Why’d he go with you to Mexico?”

“The Jeep broke down. Can you please stay focused?”

“Yeah. So, what happened? How do you know he’s not straight?”

“We’ve been having sex.”

“And you’re just tell me now?” Lydia said.

“I haven’t really got a chance, it’s a tiny apartment. I’m out on the balcony right now, freezing my ass off. He’s napping.”

“I told you he wasn’t straight.”

“I know.”

“You don’t know how vindicated I feel right now.”

Stiles groaned. “Can you please just help me?”

“With what? You guys had sex. How was it? I’m guessing pretty good since you’ve done it again?”

“We’ve done it _so_ many times.”

“Ouch.”

“Not _that_ every time. Do you know anything about – oh my god, never mind actually, just –” Stiles glanced back into the apartment – “it’s good, too good. How am I supposed to have sex with anyone else after this?”

“You’re not? What are you saying? Don’t you have feelings for him?”

“It’s Derek. You know what that means to me.”

“Yeah.” Lydia went quiet for a moment. “I think maybe this is a situation where you have to be a real adult, put on your big boy pants and have an honest conversation with him.”

“I was afraid you were going to say that.”

“Are you going to?”

“Probably not until after quarantine is over. What if we fight? We still have four days left together.” Stiles ran his hand through his hair.

“You have to talk to him.”

“I don’t want to.” Stiles shoved half the muffin in his mouth. “How are you guys doing?”

“I’m working from home except the days I absolutely need to be in the lab. Obviously, Darren’s working, I’m so glad I don’t have to worry he’ll get sick.”

“Yeah, that’s good. What about the wedding?”

Lydia was supposed to get married in June... Scott and Tess’ wedding was August.

“Based on what Darren’s seen in the hospital, we’ve decided to push the wedding.”

“That sucks.”

“We’ve been together long enough it doesn’t feel like a big deal, the wedding wasn’t something I really wanted anyways.”

“I guess it’ll be a while before we can see each other again,” Stiles pouted.

“Yeah... is your hesitation over Derek anything to do with Becca?” Shifting the conversation back to him and Derek. “Because I know it’s hard to trust someone again after getting cheated on.”

“I guess a little...” Stiles rubbed the back of his head. “Not about the cheating though. I’ve just been feeling so weird lately... I don’t know how to explain it and if I wanted to be with Derek, I’d want to do it properly. And I’m afraid if we started something now, we’re both in a place where it wouldn’t work and we’d fuck things up permanently.”

“Isn’t that what you and Derek do? Fuck things up but then make them better?”

Stiles laughed. “Yeah well this isn’t something I think we could come back from.”

“So, what are you going to tell him?”

“I guess that it’s just sex.”

“Stiles...”

“I’m not lying. Right now, it’s just sex.”

“Just like all those times you said you guys were just friends?”

“We are.”

“Alright,” Lydia said, knowing they could go in circles like this for a while.

“I should go, I’m freezing.”

“Love you.”

“Love you too,” he hung up the phone and sighed.

Stiles almost checked on Derek he slept so long. He got through another episode of the tiger documentary and decided to start dinner.

A year into college he found a simple recipe online that tasted great. Learned it inside and out to impress dates. It worked on women and men alike.

The nice thing about the recipe was that most people already had all the food. The only thing Derek didn’t have was the red pepper flakes but those were easy enough to go without.

He was chopping asparagus when Derek came out of his room in just his underwear.

“Why’d you let me sleep for so long?”

“Figured you needed it and it’s not like we have some place we have to be.”

“It smells good in here, I thought you said you couldn't cook.”

“I know how to cook one recipe. Learned it to woo potential suitors.” Stiles opened a box of pasta noodles and dumped them into the boiling water.

As he flipped the shrimp, Derek’s arms wrapped around his waist. Stiles smiled as Derek nuzzled into his neck.

“You’re trying to woo me?” Derek asked.

Stiles laughed, turning around, placing his arms on Derek’s shoulders. “No, I was hungry and it’s literally the only thing I know how to cook.”

Derek pecked him on the lips. “How long until it’s done? Do I have time for a quick shower?”

“Sure.”

They ate dinner in their underwear, sitting at the counter.

“This is really good Stiles,” Derek smiled at him, a warmth in his eyes.

“Thanks. I almost burnt the pasta noodles.”

“Not surprised.”

“So... uh... do you ever partially shift with others?” Stiles leaned his arm on the counter, facing Derek.

Derek blushed. “No, I can usually keep a hold on it.”

“Oh, so I’m just _that_ good in bed?” Stiles raised an eyebrow.

“Well you know about me and it doesn’t freak you out, so I don’t have to worry as much,” Derek said, but then he smiled down into his plate. “And yeah... you’re also really good in bed.”

“It was hot. Not that I’m into you being all wolfy during sex because that crosses into a weird bestiality territory but you losing control like that? Hot.”

Derek gave him a look. The _I-can’t-believe-Stiles-is-a-person-I-know_ look.

“What?” 

“You’re the strangest person I’ve ever met.” Derek looked down at his plate. “In a good way. You just accepted all this and never thought it was bad.”

“I never thought being a werewolf automatically made you a monster. But I definitely thought you and Peter were the bad guys.”

“Well I didn’t give you a chance to think anything else I guess.”

“I haven’t thought that in a long time though. Probably longer than you realize, or I even realized myself.”

Derek took a deep breath. “Stiles –”

Derek’s phone started ringing, he flinched, picking up his phone from the counter. “It’s Cora.”

“Go ahead, I can clean up.”

“But you made dinner,” Derek said.

“Seriously it’s all good, tell her I say hi.”

Derek gave him a quick kiss and answered the phone, walking to his room.

Stiles sighed, staring down at the empty plates. _Does he know you’re heartless?_


	6. Chapter 6

_Day Eleven_

On the eleventh day, Stiles woke up to Derek planting hot kisses down his back. He groaned, rubbing his face.

“What time is it?”

“Nine,” Derek whispered against his skin.

Stiles moved his head, on the side table was a tray of food. “You made me breakfast in bed?”

He could feel Derek’s smile against the dip in his back.

“Yeah.” He bit Stiles’ ass.

Stiles laughed, flipping over. “That tickles.”

Derek gave him a quick kiss and settled on the bed beside Stiles. He lifted the tray as Stiles pushed himself up.

“Eggs Benedict? It’s so fancy.”

Stiles grinned at Derek, as he placed the tray on Stiles’ lap. He marveled at the situation he was currently in. A hot man’s bed, being served breakfast after five days of endless sex. It was almost worth the inevitable heartbreak coming.

Derek shrugged. “It’s not that special.”

Stiles grabbed his hand. “Thank you. I appreciate all the meals you’ve been cooking for me, but this one I appreciate extra much.”

“Extra much?”

“It’s early,” Stiles mumbled, pressing his lips to Derek’s, careful not to jostle the tray on his lap.

It was the first day since they first hooked up that they didn’t have sex. At all. In any way. They made out for a while, rolling around in the sheets. Stiles rubbed his hands all over Derek’s body, feeling all of his soft skin, every dip of muscle. Derek kissed his way across Stiles’ skin, sucking hickeys on his hips.

They settled into the bed, Derek lying on his back, with Stiles’ head on his stomach.

“What was your first impression of me?” Stiles asked, breaking the cookie in half.

His head bounced as Derek laughed. He twisted his head to the side to see Derek’s face.

“What does that mean?” Stiles offered him the other half of the cookie.

Derek took it and looked at the ceiling. “Obviously I could hear you guys talking before you were even close.”

“Obviously.” Stiles popped the cookie half in his mouth.

“I guess I thought that I’ve never met a person who was so dumb and smart at the same time, also annoying. Proved that pretty early on.”

Stiles ignored that comment. “I thought you were hot.”

“I know.”

Stiles laughed. “But then that turned pretty quickly.”

“You didn’t think I was hot?”

“Well you were still hot. But also annoying and frustrating and definitely terrifying.”

“When did you stop being scared of me?”

Stiles sat up, leaning one arm over Derek onto the bed. “I don’t know the exact moment. I know after the whole pool fiasco it started to change, I started to realize that even though you were older you were just as scared and lost as us. That you were trying desperately to do the right thing but just in the completely wrong way.”

Derek shifted his gaze and took a bite of the cookie.

“Hey, don’t do that, it’s all in the past now.” Stiles put his hand on Derek’s cheek. “It all worked out.”

“A lot of people lost their lives.”

“Yeah, well no one makes it out alive,” Stiles shrugged.

Derek rolled his eyes.

“When did I stop being that annoying kid to you?” Stiles asked, watching his finger trace across Derek’s stomach.

“Who said you ever stopped?”

Stiles swatted at his stomach. “Ass.”

Derek smiled and Stiles’ heart fluttered the way it did every time he saw Derek’s smile. He was so fucked.

“Dealing with the alpha pack started to open up the possibility that you weren’t just an annoying pain in the ass. I mean you still were, but you had some strengths that were useful.”

Stiles huffed. “Glad to be of service.”

“But then when you woke me up in that elevator and I realized you had no reason to stay behind and help me, that’s probably when you went from being this annoying, frustrating pain in my ass to – well the same, but tolerable in a way you weren’t before.”

“You’re the sweetest person I know,” Stiles said, the sarcasm thick in his voice.

“We’re friends now.”

“Friends who go months without talking to each other?”

Derek smiled. “I told you I’ll call from now on.”

They didn’t talk about what was going to happen in the next two days. How this had changed their relationship. It loomed over them, Stiles could feel it with every kiss or soft touch. He pushed it away.

“When did you realize you wanted to bang me?” Stiles wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. “Assuming this didn’t come out of nowhere.”

“It didn’t... I think you’re well aware of that.”

Stiles had spent the past few years thinking the sexual tension he felt when he was with Derek was all in his imagination and it felt good to get a confirmation it wasn’t.

“Yeah, okay, continue.”

“I guess sometime during your college years?” Derek’s cheeks went red.

“That tone of voice suggests you have a specific moment in mind...” Stiles straddled Derek’s waist, he leaned over, placing his hands beside Derek’s head. “What was it?”

Derek’s hands landed on his thighs, gripping them tight. “When you moved back after your second year. I hadn’t seen you since Thanksgiving and didn’t realize how different you were going to be. It completely threw me off when you came over with Scott. You were more confident and quieter and obviously had changed physically.”

“Obviously.” Stiles tilted his head in agreement. That was the year he had his sexual awakening as well as started going to the gym.

“All of a sudden you were this person I was attracted to and I didn’t know what to do.”

“You could’ve done me.” Stiles ground their crotches together.

Derek groaned. “You were still too young.”

“I was almost twenty-one.”

“And I was almost twenty-seven.”

“I like my men older,” Stiles winked.

Derek froze, raising his eyebrows. “What’s the oldest you’ve been with?”

Stiles sat up, sitting fully on Derek. “I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours.”

“Sure.”

Stiles ran his hands up Derek’s chest.

“He was almost fifty. But like classy rich guy fifty. I was very drunk and had just failed a midterm.”

Derek made a noise deep in his throat, flipping them over. He pressed Stiles into the mattress with his body and kissed Stiles like he was trying to claim something. Claim Stiles.

Stiles pushed against his chest. “What’s yours?”

“He was in his thirties, I was in my twenties.”

“That’s not very old... youngest you’ve been with?”

Derek rolled off Stiles. “Well relative to my age, Paige was when I was fifteen.”

“Okay then biggest age gap, where you were the older one.”

“Six years.”

“Is it me?”

“Yeah –” Derek moved his hand up, his fingers brushing across Stiles’ cheek – “I don’t usually sleep with people younger than me.”

“Because of Kate.”

Derek nodded. “I don’t want to be like her.”

“You’re nothing like her.”

Stiles tugged on Derek’s arm and he moved so his head settled in the dip of Stiles’ shoulder.

“She’s literally the worst person ever. Well maybe just slightly after Gerard... you’re one of the best people I know. And my best friend is _Scott McCall_.”

Derek chuckled, lying his arm across Stiles’ waist.

Stiles hugged Derek tighter to his chest. “I’m serious though, you’ve got such a good heart.”

_Day Twelve_

“Can I come out yet?” Derek asked through the door.

Stiles draped another sheet over the structure he created. “Not yet!”

“I’m a little worried about the state of my living room.”

“You need to learn to relax, roll with the punches!”

"I think I've rolled with the punches enough for one lifetime," Derek shouted back.

Stiles plugged in the string lights and watched the fort light up. He placed his laptop and a board game beside the fort for easy access. When it was all done, he stripped down to just his underwear and walked down the hallway.

“You can come see my masterpiece,” Stiles said through the door.

The bedroom door opened and Derek looked him up and down. “Why are you in your underwear?”

“Because Derek, there’s only one rule in the fort. No pants allowed.” Stiles took his hand and led him down the hall.

Derek’s eyes widened at the fort in the middle of the living room.

“You built a fort so we can lie on the floor instead of the comfortable bed?”

“Yes, but also, I used the air mattress. I think I know how to make a fort.” Stiles pulled his hand. “Come check it out.”

Derek ducked down, crawling into the fort.

“Hey! You’re breaking the only rule.”

There was rustling. Derek’s pants hit Stiles in the face.

“Much better.” Stiles crawled in behind him. “Oh, you’re butt naked.”

“I wasn’t wearing underwear.” Derek was stretched across the air mattress.

“Even better.” Stiles crawled so he was straddling Derek. He pulled off Derek’s shirt, throwing it out of the fort.

“Where’d you get the lights?”

“I found them in a box in your closet, looked like a sad collection of Christmas decorations.” Stiles ran his hands up Derek’s chest. “What do you think? We even have stars outside our tent.”

“It’s pretty nice.” Derek laid back, grabbing Stiles’ ass and squeezing.

Stiles shoved his hand under a pillow and pulled out the lube. “Am I a good boy scout?”

“I’m not going to answer that,” Derek said, flipping them over. “But you are prepared.”

“Hmm... just wait until you see _just_ how well prepared I am,” Stiles smirked, pulling Derek in for a kiss.

After showering together, Stiles grabbed a bag of chips and Derek’s book. They crawled back into the fort. Stiles ate chips while he finished off a sketch of a flower from the other day.

“What have you been doing in that notebook all week?” Derek asked, looking up from his book.

“Promise not to judge if I show you?” Stiles’ cheeks burned.

“Is it a weird sexual thing?”

“That’s actually a pretty good guess for me, but no. It’s not.”

“I won’t judge.”

Stiles flipped to another page he’d finish. Different animals and flowers spread across the pages. He held it up so Derek could see.

“This is the closest I come to having a hobby, I took a beginner’s art class in college as an elective and found out I have somewhat of a natural ability for drawing.”

“Wow, Stiles, they’re actually really good.” Derek put down his book and flipped through a few of the pages.

Stiles grabbed it back. “Hey, don’t do that.”

“Why not?”

“I have private pictures in there.”

Derek nodded. “Weird sexual pictures?”

“No!” Stiles almost wished that’s what it was instead.

“Then what is it?”

“I – I’ve been sketching you...”

“Really? Since when?”

“Basically, the first day I started this. You were just sitting there on the end of the couch, looking the way you do and I just started sketching.”

“Can I see it?”

“No –” Stiles snapped the book shut – “absolutely not.”

Derek moved onto his knees, leaning over Stiles, kissing him feverishly. He pulled away, leaving their foreheads pressed together.

“Please?” He pressed another gentle kiss against Stiles’ lips, before kissing his jaw and down to his neck.

“Fine. But I have to finish it first.”

“Okay.” Derek pulled away, settling back down. “How do you want me?”

In every way.

“Uh, just like that is fine.”

Stiles opened up the sketchbook and got comfortable. Derek picked up his book again. It was quiet as Derek read and Stiles sketched, peaceful, like they were the only two people in the world. As if life outside the fort didn’t exist.

Half an hour passed, the light shifting in the room, getting darker in the fort.

“When do I get to see this drawing?” Derek asked, looking up from his book with an eyebrow raised.

“It’s a sketch.”

Derek huffed, turning back to his book.

Stiles added some more shading and once he thought it looked okay, he handed it over to Derek.

Derek looked at it and then up at him. “Stiles, this is really good.”

Stiles felt the blush spread across his face. “It worked well on women in college.”

“I’m just another one of your French girls?” Derek cocked an eyebrow.

Stiles laughed, crawling up the bed and hovering over Derek.

“You’re prettier than all of my French girls,” Stiles whispered, before kissing him.

_Day Thirteen_

Stiles helped Derek put together his dresser. It was a struggle, just like all the other furniture they’d assembled.

“No! That piece connects to this piece.” Stiles held up a plastic track.

“There’s no way it goes like that, that doesn’t even make sense,” Derek said, grabbing the instructions from Stiles’ hands.

“You don’t even make sense.”

Derek rolled his eyes and picked up another piece. “How are you the one with the college degree?”

Stiles made a face at him. “That’s it. No sex for you.”

Derek quirked an eyebrow towards Stiles. “You said that this morning over the pancake issue.”

That sex ban had lasted for twenty minutes. Stiles sinking to his knees in the kitchen and sucking Derek off.

Stiles pouted. “I can at least pretend I won’t give in.”

They got the dresser set up, Stiles helped Derek fold all his clothes and put them in the drawers. It all felt too domestic. Like it was their place and it was a regular Sunday morning, just putting away laundry.

After they were done they climbed back into the bed and flicked on a movie. The rain beat against the window and a large crack of thunder made Stiles jump. Derek pulled him in against his bare chest.

Halfway through the movie, the movie stopped. The power was out from the storm. Stiles moved to see if Derek was even awake, his chest was rising so slowly with deep breaths it was like he was asleep.

Derek’s eyes were still opened and he smiled when Stiles propped himself up.

“I guess we’ll have to find something else to do.” Stiles ran his hand over Derek’s skin.

“That’s a shame.” Derek moved his laptop off the bed and rolled onto his side, pulling Stiles in close.

They made out for a while. It wasn’t the same desperation they usually had. With the rain and thunder, the soft sheets, Derek’s warm body, Stiles felt a lump forming in his throat. Tomorrow it was all over. Reality would hit and they'd go their separate ways.

As he grabbed out the lube a thought popped into his head.

“Have you ever bottomed?” Stiles asked.

“No.”

“Is it something you’d want to try?” Stiles traced his finger up the expanse of Derek’s chest.

“Yeah, maybe. I’ve never trusted the person I’ve been with enough to do that.”

“Do you trust me enough?” Stiles reached down and grabbed Derek’s ass.

“Mm. Probably.” Derek’s eyes slid shut.

Now that he suggested it, he couldn’t get it out of his mind. He didn’t top often, he enjoyed bottoming. But there was something about Derek that made him want to do everything.

He moved his hand down to Derek’s hole and lightly traced around the opening.

“Now?” Derek asked.

“No time like the present, unless you don’t want that?” Stiles pulled away his hand.

“We could do that... just slowly?” Derek blushed. “I’ve never done anything more than a couple fingers.”

Stiles placed a kiss to his chest. “Slowly it is.” He put some lube on his finger and laid next to Derek.

Derek spread his legs a bit. Slowly he pushed his finger. The softness of Derek pulling him in. He twisted the finger around, letting Derek get used to the sensation. Kissing down his neck.

Stiles stared at Derek as he massaged his prostate. Watching his eyes fall closed and lips open just slightly, recognizing the familiar look of pleasure across Derek's face. With another brush of the bundle of nerves, Derek gasped and grabbed the back of Stiles’ neck. Stiles pulled out his finger. He squeezed a bit more lube on his fingers and this time pushed two back in.

Derek clenched around him.

“Try to relax a bit.” He kissed Derek’s jaw, the beard thick under his lips. He moved his fingers, brushing against the bundle of nerves and Derek cried out. “Is this okay?”

Derek nodded. “Kiss me.”

Stiles did as he wished, but Derek just panted into his mouth as he started to move his fingers faster against the spot. Stiles stretched his fingers and soon there was no resistance. Derek took three fingers easily, his dick leaking against his stomach.

“Stiles, I think I’m good.”

“Mm. I like this,” Stiles whispered, his forehead pressed against Derek’s temple. He crooked his fingers.

Derek cried out again. “Please.”

“Please, what?”

“Please fuck me.”

The words drove arousal down to his dick. Derek being submissive was so different than his usual dominating demeanor and it was doing things to Stiles.

“Only because you asked nicely.”

Stiles pulled out and grabbed the lube. He coated his dick and put more across Derek’s opening, wanting to make sure there was no reason for it to hurt.

Stiles pushed Derek onto his side, moving so they were pressed together in a line. “Are you good?”

“Yes.”

Stiles pushed Derek’s leg forward a bit and grabbed Derek’s cheek, pulling them apart. He pushed the tip of his dick in and he had to force himself to not jam the rest in.

His forehead hit Derek’s shoulder as he groaned. “Derek, oh god you’re so tight.”

Slowly, he inched his way in until his hips were flush with Derek’s ass. It was so hot and tight, he had to focus on something else just to stop himself from finishing right then.

Once he got himself under control, he wrapped his arm around Derek’s chest. Pushing himself up onto his elbow. He leaned over Derek’s shoulder. Derek’s fingers intertwined with Stiles’ against his chest. They laid together, Stiles pressed into him, and kissed. Slowly, he started to roll his hips, Derek’s hole relaxing a bit to take him.

“Are you okay?”

“Stop asking me that,” Derek groaned.

“Sorry,” Stiles smiled. “If you want me to stop just say bananas.”

Derek looked up at him. “What?”

“That’s my safe word.” Stiles laughed at the look on Derek’s face. “I’m kidding.” He dipped his head down and kissed Derek.

“Stiles, just fuck me,” Derek said with a smile.

“You're pretty demanding for a guy with a dick up his ass.”

He started to move his hips more. With Derek’s head tilted back against his shoulder he used the opportunity to suck on the spot below his ear. They moved together, Derek taking whatever Stiles gave him with breathless moans.

It was the most intimate they’d been. Derek was vulnerable and Stiles wanted to make it good for him. Their hands pressed together, against Derek’s heart. They didn’t get rough, not the way they were when Stiles bottomed. Their movements were slow and almost lazy. 

He moved his hand away from Derek’s, wrapping it around Derek’s dick and jerking him off in time to Stiles’ thrusts.

“Stiles, –”

He pushed back against Stiles’ dick.

It surprised him to find out Derek talked during sex, broken words here and there, Stiles’ name gasped out. For a man that usually was pretty quiet, he didn’t expect Derek to say anything during sex.

He tightened his grip, kissing Derek deeply. Derek groaned against his mouth, his hole suddenly tightening around Stiles’ dick. His hand covered in Derek’s cum.

Stiles coaxed Derek through his orgasm and then let go of Derek’s dick and the hold he had on his own orgasm. He held Derek tight against his chest as he pumped his hips just a couple times before he came, gasping out Derek’s name, and burying his dick as deep as it would go.

“Oh –” Derek breathed out. His hole still clenching and unclenching around Stiles’ dick, wringing him dry.

Stiles let out a breathless laugh, leaning his forehead against Derek’s shoulder. Taking a moment to catch his breath and hold Derek to his chest.

He pulled out, lying on his back.

Derek rolled over.

“Well?” Stiles tilted his head to look at Derek.

Derek looked at him, his face open and wanting. “It was good.”

“Good?”

“Mm, better than good. I liked it more than I thought I would.”

“Just gotta get the right person, a lot of guys out there suck at topping.”

Derek propped himself up on his elbow. “Am I...”

“You’re one of the good ones don’t worry,” Stiles smiled. Mimicking Derek’s position in the bed.

“You’ve been with a lot of people.” Derek reached out, letting his hand fall between them on the bed.

“Yeah...” Stiles felt an uneasiness in his stomach. “Do you not like that?”

He was a little curious of Derek’s answer, not that his opinion mattered. Something like the amount of people a person had sex with didn’t bother Stiles.

“It’s not that, I just don’t understand.” Derek touched Stiles’ cheek gently.

Stiles pulled away and frowned. “You’ve certainly made it seem like you’ve also slept with a lot of people. What’s the difference?”

“Because I was fucked up for a long time... which I guess is my real question for you.”

“What? If I’m fucked up?” Stiles fell onto his back, he exhaled roughly and stared at the ceiling. Once he started talking he couldn't stop himself. “High school was obviously not the best time of my life. I struggled with the feeling of not fitting in and with my sexuality and obviously the whole being possessed and going on a killing spree thing... things with Malia were okay. The relationship was fine, but I knew it wouldn’t last and she probably knew it too. Lydia, well that was just a whole other mess. That was also around the time I started drinking a lot, I don’t know if you know but my dad was basically an alcoholic after my mom died, and I guess I got some of that gene. Not that we shouldn’t drink, just if we’re not careful we slip into heavy drinking.” Stiles counted his fingers. Needing something else to focus on other than the gut wrenching feeling of opening up to someone.

“I didn’t really have any good friends at college. And the things that'd happened – that I’d done – in high school finally caught up with me. Years of that shit that I had just pushed away came flooding back and I could barely function. The last three years of college I basically spent drunk and having sex. But somehow, I graduated and got into the academy and I knew I had to clean up my act, otherwise I’d never make it and I didn’t want to disappoint my dad. So, I stopped drinking. Two full years I didn’t touch alcohol. And I stopped going out on weekends, hooking up with people. Dated Brian and Becca... and now here I am.” Stiles talked all the way through barely taking a breath. When he did finally take a breath, he let out a laugh. “So yeah, I guess you’re right I’m a little fucked up.”

“Stiles...”

“I don’t want this to be some pity party. I’m okay now for the most part.”

“You don’t seem okay.” Derek's hand wrapped around Stiles' bicep. "You haven't seemed okay since we met up at the rest stop."

Stiles shrugged. “I will be.”

That was the first time he’d said any of that out loud to anyone. Scott knew bits and pieces, he was part of the reason Stiles stopped drinking. One night Stiles called him for a ride home – again – and Scott yelled at him all the way home. Maybe not the best approach to helping someone clearly struggling with a drinking problem, but then again Stiles never reacted normally to a situation.

It was the catalyst to him quitting. That whole story though... he’d never told anyone. Scott and the others seemed fine, as if it was just normal life and he’s supposed to just pick himself up and move on.

But Derek was like him, he couldn’t just move on. That’s why Stiles always felt a connection. When he felt like he didn’t fit in with the rest of the group, he always turned to Derek. The two of them finding the quiet moments in pack get-togethers, unspoken conversations in their looks. They understood each other in ways the others didn’t.

“You know what this means though...” Stiles grinned, changing the subject before he broke down or said something more embarrassing. 

“What?”

“I took your bottoming-virginity,” Stiles laughed. “I took one of Derek Hale’s virginities.”

“One of them?”

“Yeah, you know, like first time you slept with a girl, first time you slept with a guy... first time you topped... first time you bottomed.” Stiles shrugged. “All those firsts... and I took one of them.”

Derek rolled his eyes. “You’re such a dork.”

“When did you lose your other virginities?” Stiles asked. “I’m assuming Paige was the first girl.”

Derek’s cheeks blushed. “Why do we have to talk about this?”

“We don’t... but I’m kind of interested. I spent so long thinking you were straight.”

“Me too,” Derek said. “Yes, Paige was the first girl I had sex with... the first time I was with a guy in any capacity was about a year before I came back to Beacon Hills. I was living in San Francisco and met a guy who was in town for a work conference.”

“Did you know you liked guys at that point?”

“I knew I found them attractive but with everything that'd happened I didn’t really give it much thought, Laura and I were so focused on surviving it didn’t leave much time for anything else. But things at that point had settled and I was living on my own and I was young,” Derek said. “He approached me when I was at a restaurant, I told him I didn’t like men, he told me that either I was lying or I hadn’t given it a chance yet.”

“Wow that’s cocky.”

Derek smirked. “Yeah but it worked. We went back to his hotel and hooked up, just little things at a time, he was actually very understanding about it all... we spent three days together, in between his conference events. And he was right, I wasn’t straight. After he left I took the chance to explore this newfound attraction.”

“So, you were a slut?”

Derek laughed. “Maybe a little.”

“I realized I was bisexual in high school, as you know. Coincidentally at that party the twins threw in your loft, a girl asked if I liked guys too. It was like a whole new world opened up and things made a lot more sense but then of course I got possessed and stuff so that really threw a whole wrench in my teenage sexual awakening. After Lydia and I broke up though I decided to try it out. Made out with a couple dudes here and there, I met Dean. Lost all kinds of virginities to him and dated him for a couple months... but he ended up being too much of an asshole. Even for me.”

“I don’t think I ever met Dean.”

“You would’ve hated him. As much as it disgusts me to say this, he was kind of like Jackson, so I guess that’s your proof right there that I was fucked up.”

Derek didn’t say anything, he just pulled Stiles into his chest, forcing him onto his side so he was the little spoon.

“No, I don’t like being the little spoon!”

Derek held on tighter. “Just relax.”

Stiles let out a sigh but settled into the bed. “You’re going to have to wash your sheets the second we’re allowed out.”

Derek laughed.

“Quick powernap and then we definitely have to shower,” Stiles muttered.

Derek kissed the back of his neck and Stiles’ eyelids got heavy as he watched the rain run down the window. At some point, they fell asleep, wrapped up together with the storm raging on outside.

_Day Fourteen_

The buzzing of his phone woke him up. He was alone in the bed. The sound of Derek cooking could be heard.

_What did you do to Derek?_

He wasn’t sure what Scott meant, but he was almost certain he wasn’t referring to Stiles fucking him the day before.

_I’m not sure what you mean._

_I just got off the phone with him._

_And?_

_I think you should stop sleeping with him._

_Why?_

_This means a lot more to Derek than it does to you._

_Why do you say that? He hasn’t mentioned it being anything but casual._

_I know we always joke about you being an asshole but if you keep sleeping with him without talking to him about it, then you’ll truly be an asshole._

_Fuck off Scott._

Derek stuck his head in the bedroom. “Hey, breakfast’s ready.”

Stiles flashed a fake smile the guilt rising in his throat. “Thanks, I’ll be out in a sec.”

He looked back at his phone, Scott had sent another text.

_Talk to him._

Stiles took reprieve in the shower. What could he do? He obviously felt something more than physical attraction to Derek. And surprisingly they were good together. But it was all just fantasy. Locked together in a one bedroom apartment with no outer world stressors or pressures. As soon as the real world came crashing down they’d break.

Scott had said that this meant more to Derek, which meant Derek had to have feelings. It wasn’t like Stiles missed the fond look in his eyes or the affectionate side of Derek that’d come out during their quarantine. But a relationship?

Becca’s words from their last fight came to his mind. _I gave you everything our first year together, I loved you and still it wasn’t enough. I tried, I tried so hard to be with you but you’re fucked up. You don’t let anybody in, you’re closed off. What am I supposed to do?_

Becca was right. He could only pretend like things were okay for so long and then it always crumbled. He had hurt Becca and he knew that he’d end up hurting Derek.

“So, it’s the end of our quarantine.”

Derek nodded. “I know you’re worried about your dad and Marie but you still have to work, so you can stay here if you want.”

“For how long Derek?”

“What do you mean?”

“This shelter-in-place thing could be months.” Stiles pushed his pancake through the syrup. “I just don’t know how long we can keep this up... especially when there’s no end in sight yet.”

“The past two weeks haven’t been so bad.”

“Because of the quarantine.”

Derek’s brows furrowed.

“Before this we went eight months without a single word,” Stiles said.

“I don’t get what you’re trying to say.”

_I tried so hard to be with you but you’re fucked up._

“I’m saying Derek, that we’ve managed to get along the past two weeks and I had a good time, but we’re barely friends in real life. The past two weeks doesn’t make this anything more.”

Derek looked down at his plate.

“You’re Derek and I’m me. We don’t work long-term, we’re both too fucked up for this, we can’t even hold a relationship long enough to know if we truly love the person and I had a _two-year_ relationship.”

Derek nodded. “Yeah. You’re right.”

Stiles exhaled, he reached out, brushing his fingers against Derek’s arm. “I’m right?”

“Yeah, the past two weeks have been fun but I’m good with leaving this at what it is. Barely friends.”

“Derek, I didn’t –”

“I’m going to get ready.” Derek stood up and scraped his food into the garbage. 

Stiles watched the bathroom door shut. He felt strange. Sad. The whole apartment made his skin itch and he couldn’t wait to get home.

He finished his food and washed the dishes, packed up his things. After Derek came out of the shower, Stiles went in and finished getting ready for the day.

Derek was quiet, he looked like the old Derek. Cut off and reserved, not like the Derek that’d emerged over the past few years.

They loaded the car up and Derek drove him back to his dad’s place. His Jeep sat in the driveway.

Derek parked on the side of the street not shutting off the car.

“Well thanks for letting me stay... and paying for the groceries and just in general putting up with me.”

Derek smiled sadly at him. “No problem.”

“I’ll see you around,” Stiles said.

He almost tacked on a _don’t forget to call_. But it felt too weird, he gave Derek shit for not calling. Now he didn’t really want him to.

Derek nodded. As Stiles got out of the car, his dad came out of the house.

“Hey Derek! I’m glad to see you survived the fourteen days.”

“It was fine,” Derek said. “I should get going though, have a few things I have to do.”

“Alright, we’ll see you at some point.” His dad grabbed a couple bags from Stiles. “Thanks for everything.”

Derek pulled away from the curb.

His dad glanced at him. “Everything okay with him?”

“Yeah fine, probably just glad to be away from me.” Stiles watched Derek’s car disappear down the street before they walked into the house.


	7. Chapter 7

When Stiles’ got home from work, Scott was in the kitchen with Marie and Olivia.

“How was the first shift back?” Marie asked.

“It was fine.” Stiles pulled his shirt out of his pants, undoing the buttons. “What are you guys doing?”

“I’m just picking up Olivia on my way home, was hoping to talk to you though.” Scott put a mug in the sink. “Thanks for the tea Marie.”

“Anytime. I’ll take Olivia.”

Scott handed Olivia over to Marie and walked out of the room, Stiles followed him up the stairs into Stiles’ bedroom.

“You probably know why I’m here,” Scott said, turning around.

“You talked to the woman we found?” Stiles asked, taking off his work shirt and hanging it off the back of his chair.

“No,” Scott frowned. “Well I did but that’s not what I was here to talk to you about. Everything’s fine on her part. Well not fine, but nothing supernatural.”

“Okay so she’s just bat-shit crazy, good to know.”

“Stiles... I’m here about Derek.”

Stiles sighed, leaning back against his desk. He rubbed his mouth and tried to think of the politest way to say _fuck off_.

“What happened with you two?” Scott asked.

“You told me to stop sleeping with him, so I did.”

“Why?”

“Mainly because we’re all stuck in this shelter-in-place mess. But also, because it was just sex, no sense continuing on.”

“He’s gone to his ranch, doesn’t plan on coming back for a long time.”

That didn’t surprise Stiles. He always ran away.

“Okay and why is that significant? He leaves Beacon Hills all the time.”

“He sounded really hurt on the phone.”

“Derek doesn’t get hurt over things like casual sex ending. It’s Derek. Look, the two weeks were great, we had a lot of fun and yeah maybe there were some points I thought about the future. But I mean come on, we were stuck in a tiny apartment and only had each other. Any future where we weren’t limited to just an apartment sounded great!”

“What if he wanted more?”

“Even if he did, I don’t want anything more. With anybody for a long time.”

“Stiles, you deserve to be happy.”

“And you’re saying that’s with Derek?”

“No, I don’t know what makes you happy. If being alone truly makes you happy then be alone, but from what I’ve seen, Derek –”

“Not that this is any of your business, but Derek doesn’t make me happy. Derek makes me want to bash my head off a fucking wall. He’s infuriating and secretive and he’s _Derek_.” Stiles pushed off the desk. “So please, just leave it alone. It’s over and we’ve both moved on.”

Scott gave him a look. A look he’s received plenty of times over their friendship which meant he knew Stiles was bullshitting him.

But Stiles really didn’t want to talk about it. With anyone. All he wanted was a shower and a nap. Maybe some food. And definitely not Derek.

Scott nodded. “Alright, well, I’ll talk to you later.”

“Great, bye.”

After the front door closed behind Scott and Olivia, Stiles turned on the shower. He stripped down, staring at himself in the mirror.

The only proof of what’d happened with Derek was a cluster of dark hickeys dotted across his hips and waist. At the time he couldn’t stop laughing, Derek’s lips and beard dragging across his skin, tickling him. He tried to push Derek away but the man just made a low growling noise, and held onto him tighter. Stiles had complained, said it wasn’t fair that Derek could do that to him but anytime Stiles sucked a hickey into Derek’s skin it disappeared.

Now it was all he had left. He pressed on a bruise and the sharp pain sent arousal straight to his dick. Climbing in the shower he wrapped a soapy hand around his dick and jerked himself off quick and harsh.

Images of Derek moving above him, pressing him into the bed. The memory of Derek being in him and all around him. Kissing him. Pulling Stiles down onto the bed or the couch or the floor. His laughter when Stiles made a joke or the soft look in his eyes when he looked at Stiles across the counter.

Stiles came quickly and tears rushed down his cheeks as he leaned against the shower wall. He’d get through this. It’d be like all the other hard moments in his life. He’d think about it less and less, the pain would dull to an ache, and slowly he’d get over Derek. Because he couldn’t be with him.

*

Becca looked the same as she always did, dressed in her paramedic uniform. She smiled shyly at him, closing her trunk. They stood far apart, partially because of the virus, but also Stiles didn’t want her any closer.

“How’ve you been?” she asked, crossing her arms and leaning on her car.

“Good. You?”

“Yeah, good.” She tucked a loose piece of hair behind her ear. “Stiles, I’m – I’m sorry.”

There it was. The apology he thought he’d never get.

“Yeah.” He realized he didn’t feel angry anymore. “Well, we both made a lot of mistakes and it was probably for the best.”

“I could feel you drifting and I panicked.”

“I’m sorry for the way I treated you,” he said. “I wasn’t ready for anything serious.”

Brian passed him in the parking lot and waved. Stiles gave him a tense smile and waved back. As soon as Brian was in his car, Becca took a step forward.

“Sometimes I miss what we had.”

“You’re with Wyatt now.”

Stiles couldn’t believe this was happening. It was just like her to do something like this.

“I’m starting to realize I may’ve made a mistake.”

“Becca, we’re not getting back together.”

“Why not? We could’ve been good together, if we made a go at it, if we committed.”

“Because you cheated on me... for a whole year... and because – well – I don’t love you, I haven’t in a long time.” Stiles felt the weight lift off his shoulder. “There’s someone else.”

“Someone else? You were cheating on me?”

“Not like you were. But yeah, maybe I was in a way.”

“Who was it?”

Stiles looked away.

“You’re not even going to tell me?”

“It doesn’t make a difference.”

She raised one perfect eyebrow. “Is it Derek?”

He was sure his expression was a mixture of surprise and embarrassment... and confirmation.

She scoffed, pushing off her car and opening the driver’s door. “Well, I wish you _all_ the luck with that.” The sarcasm he used to love about her slipping out.

“You too.”

Stiles moved out of the way of her car and watched her drive away. Glad to have dodged that fucking bullet.

*

The next few weeks passed slowly. Precautions went in place. His dad came back to work.

When Stiles wasn’t working, he helped babysit Olivia. Marie started to teach him how to cook. Trying to learn how to be a better adult. He couldn’t keep letting other people take care of him. The weather got warmer and he helped his dad build a vegetable garden in the backyard for Marie. He video chatted with Lydia, told her the whole story in detail. She told him he was crazy for letting Derek go.

Maybe he was.

Two months into social isolation, there was a knock on the door. Marie was busy with Olivia. He swung open the door and froze when he saw Derek standing on the front porch. Looking the same as he did the last time Stiles saw him.

“What are you doing here?” Stiles asked. It came out harsher than he meant it to.

Derek held up a bag. “I still have Marie’s pan from when she made us food.”

“Oh. Right –” Stiles took the bag – “that’s all?”

“Yeah.”

They hadn’t talked since the day he moved back in with his dad.

“Did you want to come in?” Stiles didn’t know why he offered.

“No, I have somewhere to be.”

“How’ve you been?”

“Fine, just working on the house.” Derek looked like the conversation was slowly killing him. “You?”

“Busy with work. But so far I’m healthy so I can’t complain.”

Derek nodded. “Well see you around.”

“Yeah.”

*

Around six months old, Olivia’s eyes flashed a bright yellow on the full moon. Just a quick flash. Scott called Derek and asked what it meant. She was a werewolf. A huge breath of relief was released that day, she couldn’t get sick.

The summer came and went, the virus spreading more rapidly.

There were days when he was watching TV or sitting on a blanket in the backyard with Olivia, and he thought about Derek. Wondered what he was doing, if he was painting his new house or reading. He wondered if Derek had slept with anyone else. He assumed no, not because he thought Derek wouldn’t sleep with anyone else, but because of the whole pandemic situation.

Sometimes his dad would find him staring out the window and ask if he was okay. He honestly didn’t know the answer.

September came around and slowly life got back to normal, they flattened the curve. Somehow, miraculously, things started to get better.

*

“Do you like it?” his dad asked.

Stiles shrugged. “It’s not the Jeep.”

“Stiles, the Jeep is done, nothing lasts forever.”

He knew that better than anybody. Running his hand over the car. Newer year but not the newest, good condition, low mileage, not just the base model. It was in his price range.

“Sometimes you gotta let things go,” his dad said. “You need a reliable car.”

But the Jeep was more than just a car. It was his mom’s and in a way it felt like an extension of Stiles. Broken, falling apart. Held together by duct tape.

Lately, Stiles started to feel better. Let the shit with Becca go because she wasn’t worth it. He visited Allison’s grave and cried for the first time since she’d died. They were never that close but he cared about her and had felt responsible for her death. It was the last thing he'd been holding onto from high school. Finally making peace with what'd happened.

Getting a new car felt like moving on. A new him, a new car. It was stupid.

“I’ll take it,” Stiles said to the salesman.

*

They were able to have Thanksgiving together as a pack. The first time he’d seen any of his friends other than Scott and Tess since the virus stuff got serious. Derek didn’t show up. When he asked about it, Scott told him to call Derek himself.

He did as soon as he got home. Maybe he'd ask Derek out for dinner. See if there was a chance they could fix their relationship. Or at least their friendship.

“Noah? Is everything alright?”

He forced his voice to be cheerful, friendly. “Is that how you always answer the phone?”

“Stiles?”

“Yeah.”

“Why are you calling on your dad’s phone?”

“I was a little worried you wouldn’t answer my call.” Stiles picked at a stray thread on his shirt.

“Why’s that?”

“I just feel like we left things in a weird place. You haven’t come back for a while now and I don’t know what to think.”

“I’m in Brazil.”

“Right.”

“I’m actually getting a place here permanently, selling the ranch and apartment.”

A lump formed in Stiles’ throat, he tried to swallow it but it wouldn’t go away. He pulled the phone away from his face and took a deep breath.

“Stiles?”

“Yeah, I’m still here.” Stiles put the phone back to his ear. “Brazil, eh?”

“I spend so much time here. The weather’s nice, Cora’s here.”

“So, you wouldn’t come back to Beacon Hills?”

“Once or twice a year.”

Stiles rubbed the tears from his eyes. He was being stupid. He couldn’t get upset at Derek for moving to Brazil when he was the one that said he didn’t want anything more. So much for repairing their relationship.

“I guess you don’t spend much time here anyways.”

Stiles looked at the photo Lydia had printed off for him. From the Fourth of July weekend. Derek’s face was twisted up into a grimace with Stiles’ arm wrapped around his neck and tongue pressed to Derek’s cheek. And even though Derek’s face looked unimpressed, his eyes looked happy.

“Nothing really left for me.”

Stiles flipped the picture over. “Well I just wanted to say happy thanksgiving.”

“You too.”

“Tell Cora I say hi.”

“Will do.”

“Bye.”

“Goodbye Stiles.”

Stiles hung up and tossed the phone onto his bed. “Fuck!” He wiped his face, throwing his head back against the computer chair.

“Stiles?”

He stared up at the ceiling. “What?”

“You alright?” his dad asked.

“I’m fine.” Stiles sat up.

“This isn’t about Becca, is it?”

“No.” He hadn’t thought of her in a while.

His dad sat down on the edge of his bed. “Is it Derek?”

Stiles froze. “I’m not sure what you mean.”

“You’ve been different ever since you came back from his place. What happened?”

He didn’t want to talk to his dad about this. How could he tell his dad that he spent a week having casual sex with his longtime crush and turned said crush down for anything more for reasons he couldn’t even understand himself? And now that crush was moving to Brazil and he couldn’t do anything to stop it? That he had no right to be upset?

“Nothing happened.”

“Sure seems like something happened. Did he hurt you?”

“No, no. He didn’t hurt me –” he bit his lip – “it was me that was the asshole. Surprise.”

“Did you apologize?”

“It’s not like that.”

“Apologizing goes a long way. And if he cares about you, which from what we’ve seen, he does, then you might just get a second chance.”

“We?”

“Marie and me.”

Stiles threw his head back again. “Oh my god. Why is everyone involved in this?”

“What does Scott think?”

“He supported it. Which is just weird cause it’s me and Derek.”

“Maybe he just wants his best friend to be happy for once.”

“Hey, I’m happy.”

His dad gave him an unimpressed look. “I don’t think you’ve ever been happy.”

“Well doesn’t that mean I should learn how to be happy on my own and accept myself before I leap into another relationship?”

“I don’t think you have a problem of being on your own. In fact, I think you’re too good at being on your own. I think you need to learn how to let people in, more than just me and Scott.” His dad stood up. “Don’t think I haven’t seen that photo of you and Derek, –” his dad pointed to the overturned photo on Stiles’ desk – “it doesn’t take a sheriff to realize how happy those two people in the photo are together.”

*

They had a going away party for Derek. He considered not going but that’d be the biggest dick move, so he put on his nicest button-down shirt and showed up. Even brought a gift.

He waited until Derek went into the kitchen alone and followed him.

“No white Christmas for you I guess.”

Derek spun around. “Not this year. It’ll be weird not having Cora and Tom come here.”

“Yeah,” Stiles said.

“I saw that you got a new car.”

Stiles nodded, leaning against the doorframe. “Figured it was time, I still have the Jeep. Waiting until I have disposable income and then I’ll start replacing the duct tape with new parts.” Stiles held out the gift before he lost his nerve. “This is your going away, slash, birthday, slash, Christmas present.”

“You didn’t have to get me anything.”

“It’s really not much.”

Derek unwrapped the gift, he looked up at Stiles. “This is really nice.”

Stiles had bought a frame – not just a cheap frame from the dollar store – but a real oak frame and put in the Fourth of July photo of the two of them. His peace offering.

Stiles shrugged. “Just something in case you start to miss the pack, you’ll remember how annoying I am.”

Derek gave him a small smile. “Thanks.”

“Maybe this year we’ll all come to Brazil to visit as our trip.”

“Maybe.”

The silence was awkward. It hadn’t been before, living with him for two weeks had a lot of quiet time but it’d been comfortable, normal, peaceful. Now it was fraught with unsaid words and hurt.

“Do you regret what happened?” Stiles asked quietly, not looking up from his hands.

Derek’s answer surprised him. “No.”

Stiles did. Not the sex part obviously, the way it all fell apart because of him. How he didn’t even give Derek a chance to talk about it, see if he felt the same. Now it was too late.

Stiles nodded.

“Do you?” Derek asked, curiosity in his eyes.

“No.” Stiles gave a partial truth. “It was fun.”

“Yeah.”

There was a crash from the other room, making both of them jump.

“Liam!” Tess shouted. “That’s the second fucking dining table in a year!”

Stiles laughed. “Well better get back out there before it becomes world war three.”

“Yeah,” Derek said, but didn’t move.

Stiles could feel his stare on him as he went back into the living room alone.

*

Stiles’ phone rang, he was lying in bed and it was on his desk. He let it go to voicemail. It rang again a minute later and he pushed himself up.

“Hello Scott, what are you doing on this bitterly cold evening?” Stiles asked. “Other than harassing me with phone calls.”

“I’m calling to tell you to stop being an idiot and go see Derek.” Scott sounded fed up and a little frustrated.

Stiles frowned. “Why?”

“He’s moving in one week.”

“I know.”

“That’s it?”

“What am I supposed to say?”

“To me? Or to Derek?”

“I can’t stop him so why bother going to see him? It’ll hurt too much.”

“If you told him to stay, he would.”

“It’s too late for any of that. Plus, I’m not telling him to stay, don’t you want him to be happy?” Stiles paced around his room.

“He’s not going to be happy in Brazil.”

“Maybe not at first, but he’ll move on.”

“Stiles. It’s been a year and a half since you kissed him and he hasn’t moved on.”

Stiles froze, mid-pace. “What? How did you –”

“He told me about it, asked me what it meant, he knew you were lying when you pretended you didn’t remember.”

He went over a year thinking Scott didn’t know. That the only people who knew were him, Derek, and Lydia. All this time Scott knew and kept it to himself. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I’m wasn’t going to break his trust.”

“Then why are you telling me now?” Stiles tried to keep his voice calm.

“Because you’re being selfish, you’re so deep in your own pity party you can’t even see that Derek wants to be with you. Why do you think him and Karly broke up?”

“He told me he didn’t love her.”

“He didn’t love her because he loves you.”

“Has he said that to you? Has he said out loud, the exact words of _‘I love Stiles’_ because I’m finding it pretty fucking hard to believe.”

“No, he hasn’t said those exact words. But he doesn’t need to. It’s pretty obvious.”

“When I kissed him on the beach and took the chance, he pushed me away.”

“Because you were drunk and with Becca. Derek might be a lot of things but relationships are important to him. _You’re_ important to him and he’s not going to risk it for one drunken night.”

“He risked it for a casual week of sex.”

“It wasn’t casual. Not to him... I tried to warn him, I told him you weren’t invested the way he was, I told him when you guys first got quarantined it wouldn’t end well. But he insisted everything would be fine. That nothing would happen. But then it happened and it meant everything to him and you sat there and told him it meant nothing. Treated him like he was just another notch on your bedpost. Which is a lie, you don’t talk to me about him, but I know what Derek means to you.”

“I –”

Stiles sat down on his bed, running his hand through his hair.

He couldn’t believe what Scott was saying, how could it be true?

Derek couldn’t love him. He never made any effort to have a relationship with Stiles, not even a fully functioning friendship. But every time they saw each other their relationship changed. They got closer each time and every time Derek left it hurt a little more. Stiles pushed himself into his work and his relationships to ignore it, because he never thought anything with Derek was possible. Even after having sex for a week he couldn’t believe it. Derek didn’t exactly confirm anything. He just accepted what Stiles told him and –

“Stiles?”

“I don’t even know what to think.”

“I know what I think,” Scott said. “I think you’ve loved him for just as long. If not longer.”

Stiles laughed. “That’s –” What was it? True, maybe. But he couldn’t admit that out loud.

“In one week, you’re going to lose your chance at the best thing to ever happen to you, do you want that?”

“If this meant so much to him and he had feelings, then why didn’t he say something? Why didn’t he talk to me? Why isn’t he the one showing up on my doorstep and telling me he’s going to stay?”

“Stiles... I love you but you’re so dumb sometimes.”

“I’m not following.”

“Look at Derek’s track record with relationships. Karly was the first healthy relationship he’s had probably ever and it ended because he has feelings for you. When you guys were together, he figured you guys were more serious based on the emotions _you_ were putting off –”

“Oh.”

“Yeah. And then when you said it was just sex, it threw him off and you know what he’s like better than anybody else... he figured you weren’t ready for another relationship so he tried to move on but the only way he could do that was by separating himself from you.”

“And he told you all of this? Instead of me? And you’re just telling me now?”

“Yeah. Well I thought at some point you’d get over yourself and see what you two had. I didn’t realize we’d come this close to Derek leaving. I should’ve though because the only person more stubborn than Derek is you. But if you let him go, you’re going to lose him for good.”

Stiles stood up, scrambling for his coat and keys. “Is he in Beacon Hills?”

“No, he’s at his house.”

“What’s his address?”

“I’ll text it to you.”

“Thanks Scott.”

“Good luck,” Scott said.

“Don’t fuck it up,” Tess yelled in the background.

Stiles laughed, wiping the tears off his cheeks. “I’ll try not to.”

He hung up and typed the address into his maps. It was two and a half hours away. He ran down the stairs, shoving on his shoes. As he tied the laces, his dad and Marie came into the hall.

“Where are you going in such a rush?” his dad asked.

“Redding.”

His dad’s eyebrows shot up. “Derek’s?”

He should’ve known that even his dad knew where Derek lived.

“Yeah.”

“Why?”

Stiles grabbed a pair of gloves from the closet. “Because I’ll never forgive myself if I let him leave without telling him the truth.”

“Oh Stiles, that’s great,” Marie said.

“Text me when you get there and if you need to pull over I’ll come get you,” his dad said.

“Okay.” Stiles opened the front door, the freezing air hitting his face like needles.

“Stiles.”

He turned around.

“I’m proud of you,” his dad said.

Derek wasn’t kidding when he said there was no one around for miles. Just stretched out plains of farm fields dusted in white snow. The car’s headlights passed over the For-Sale sign as he pulled in the long driveway, slowing down. The driveway was dirt and filled with potholes.

The house itself was gorgeous. Wooden beams supporting the roof. Grey stone walls and big wooden front door. The front window was floor to ceiling, all lit up with a golden light. Out of all the places Derek had lived over the years, this was the one Stiles could see him in. It was the one he deserved.

He parked the car, shooting off a quick text to his dad. His legs wouldn’t move so he sat in the car, just staring at the house. In his haste to get to Derek’s he didn’t even think about what he was going to say. Barely registering anything but the road in front of him during the long drive.

Now that he was here, he’d lost his nerve. After the way he had treated Derek, how could Stiles stand on his doorstep and demand he stay?

There was movement inside the house and Derek’s figure walked down the front hallway towards the door.

It was too late for him to just turn around and drive home. Plus, he came all the way here and Derek was moving to Brazil so he didn’t really have anything to lose.

He took off his gloves and got out, walking the short distance to the front door. His knees barely supporting him.

Derek opened the door and looked shocked to see Stiles standing on his porch.

“Before you say anything, let me talk.”

Derek stayed quiet, hand still on the door.

“I’m sorry. For what I said in March and for not being honest with you or myself. I’m sorry for being a huge asshole and I’m sorry that I’ll probably always be an asshole. I’m sorry that I haven’t called in the past eight years except that one time I was really drunk.” Stiles took a deep breath. “And I’m sorry it took me this long to show up here. I know I’ve probably lost my chance to be with you and I have no right to say this, but please stay. Don’t move to Brazil, don’t leave again.”

Derek’s lips opened with a silent gasp. His hand dropping from the door. “You didn’t miss your chance.”

“I...” Stiles trailed off, wiping his nose across his sleeve.

“Come in? I just finished making dinner.”

“I’m not hungry.”

Derek stepped out onto the front porch. “Stiles, I’m trying to tell you that I’ll stay.”

“You shouldn’t,” he said, even as a smile broke through his tears.

Derek wrapped his arms around Stiles’ waist, pulling him in against his warm body. “Maybe I shouldn’t but I want to. I want to be with you. _Actually,_ be with you, not just sex.”

Tentatively Stiles rested his hands on the back of Derek’s neck. “I’m kind of a shitty person.” He brushed his thumb across Derek's jaw.

“Me too.”

“And I’m pretty shit at relationships.”

“I invented being shit at relationships.”

Stiles laughed. “Well then maybe Matt was right about something... we do make a pretty good pair.”

Derek frowned. “Why would you say that? It was scarring enough when he said it.”

“More scarring than the homicidal lizard creature that paralyzed us?”

“Definitely.” He dipped his head down and kissed Stiles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just one (short) chapter to go!


	8. 1,826 Days

Derek held Carter delicately in his arms, smiling up at Cora. “He’s beautiful.”

Stiles leaned on Derek’s shoulder. “Hello Carter Derek Santos, are you going to be as grumpy as your uncle?”

Cora laughed. “You saw the baby picture from the hospital.”

“His expression was exactly like Derek’s when I tell him I forgot to pick up the groceries.”

The front door opened and the shrieking of a five-year-old jolted Carter in Derek’s arms.

“Is that Olivia I hear?” Stiles yelled, moving towards the front foyer.

Tess and Scott looked exhausted with their arms full of bags and toys but happy. Olivia bee-lined it for him.

“Take off your shoes!” Scott sighed.

Stiles caught Olivia in his arms, laughing, he swung her up to his hip. “It’s all good. How are you today Olivia?”

She squirmed in his arms, a little shy. “I got this.” She shoved a black stuffed-wolf into his chest.

He grabbed it and held it up. “Wow, do you know that this looks _just_ like your uncle Derek? Maybe if you ask nicely, he’ll show you.”

Stiles put her down and she ran into the kitchen screaming for Derek.

“He’s not going to be impressed,” Scott said, putting the car carrier down on the ground.

Stiles shrugged, crouching down. “Hello Amelia,” he whispered.

The ten-month old baby was asleep, her fat cheeks squishing her mouth into a funny shape. He brushed his finger softly against her cheek before standing back up.

“How are you guys?” He hugged Scott.

Tess let out a long breath. “I’m seven months pregnant. Again. How do you think I am?”

“I mean if you weren’t such a slut...” Stiles grinned as Tess swatted at him.

“We’re good, how are you guys?” Scott took a suitcase from Tess’ hand.

“Busy with work, but good. We just finished the gazebo, you’ll have to check it out.”

“You say that like you built it,” Derek said from behind them.

He turned around. “I mean I went out and bought the supplies.”

“You bought nails. I asked for screws.”

Scott laughed. “I can see things have really changed,” he said, pulling Derek in for a hug. “Where’s everyone else?”

The whole pack was coming for the long weekend. Stiles and Derek invited everyone over because Cora, Tom, and Carter were in town for a visit. They were thinking of moving to Beacon Hills, so their kids could grow up with family, and because they were having some issues with their pack.

“You’re the first people to arrive other than the Brazil crew.” Stiles helped Tess with the bags.

They joined Cora in the kitchen. She was crouched down, showing Carter to Olivia, who chatted away about _her baby sister Amelia_. Tess set the car carrier down on the ground and sat at the table, sighing and rubbing her huge stomach.

“Where’s Tom?” Scott asked as he crouched down beside Olivia.

“He forgot to pack the diapers. For our month-old baby.” Cora rolled her eyes, looking just like Derek. “He’s out getting some, thankfully I was the one who packed our carry-on diaper bag.”

“Can I hold him daddy?” Olivia looked up at Scott.

“As long as his mom says it’s okay.”

“Of course, why don’t we move to somewhere easier?” Cora suggested.

They moved the crew into the large living room. Derek had built a huge stone fireplace years before and the floor to ceiling windows looked out onto their sprawling backyard. To this day, Stiles still would stand in the middle of the room, or the kitchen, or anywhere in the house really, and wonder how it was his life. How he got so lucky.

Olivia settled on the couch, Scott sitting beside her. Cora handed off Carter and sat down on a chair.

Tess put her feet up on the coffee table just as Amelia stirred. Leaning her head back against the couch, she let out a frustrated groan.

“I’ll get her.” Stiles jumped up and picked Amelia up out of her carrier. “Hello baby girl, was that a good nap?” She gave him a tired look.

“I never thought you'd be good with kids,” Cora said.

Amelia giggled at him as he stuck out his tongue.

“You should hear my rendition of Baby Shark.” Stiles sat on the couch next to Derek. “I call it Baby Wolf.”

Cora laughed. “I’m sure you love that Derek.”

Derek smiled and put his arm around Stiles’ shoulder. “It’s good when it keeps the kids happy... not as enjoyable when he’s singing it all week afterwards.”

Stiles laid Amelia on his lap, holding her feet. He started singing the song, Amelia laughing away.

The front door opened, the front hall filling with chatter and laughter. Tom came into the living room holding a box of diapers.

“I found some people out in the driveway,” Tom said.

Marie, his dad, Melissa, and Chris were next through the door having all taken the same car.

Suddenly, Derek and Stiles’ house was filled with people and children. The way Stiles liked it. Lately, he hadn’t been able to visit Beacon Hills as much as usual, having too much to do at work. And he had missed the chaos.

Their ranch had become the main place for pack get-togethers even though it was out of town for most people. It was a big house with enough rooms for people to stay in and a big property with lots to do.

They even had his dad and Marie’s wedding on their property a year ago. Stiles may or may not have cried when they said _I do_.

The others arrived over the next hour. Liam and his girlfriend came after he was done work. Lydia showed up with Malia and Kira. She’d been living with them after her divorce, just temporarily.

After the kids were put to bed, they sat on the back deck around the large table his dad and Derek had built one summer.

Stiles stood up, clearing his throat. “Before we eat, I just wanted to thank everyone for making the trip out here for the weekend. We’re lucky to have you all in our lives,” Stiles said.

“You’ve grown soft with old age,” Malia said.

Stiles rolled his eyes. “Alright, so we’re lucky to have everyone but Malia in our lives.”

The group stayed quiet, waiting for something more.

Stiles held up his glass. “Let the meal commence!” 

Nobody moved.

“You guys aren’t announcing anything?” Lydia asked.

“What?” Stiles glanced at Derek before looking back at the group. “No...”

“Oh,” Lydia said.

“Why’d you think that?” Stiles sat down.

“You gathered us all here, after five years of being together...” Lydia looked around the table. “Oh, come on guys, I wasn’t the only one expecting some kind of announcement?”

Stiles and Derek smiled at each other. Sharing the secret knowledge of an adoption application sitting on their desk in the office. They were just starting the process and were waiting until things got more serious before they told anyone. It was the hardest secret Stiles had ever kept.

“I definitely thought they were going to announce Stiles was pregnant,” Tess said.

“Oh my god.” Stiles laughed, throwing a bun at her head. She caught it of course. “Well sorry to disappoint, we don’t have an announcement.”

“Not even that Derek’s going to make an honest man out of you?” Cora asked.

Stiles sighed. “Okay forget what I said, we’re not lucky to have any of you in our lives,” he said with a smile.

They started eating, dishing out the barbecued hamburgers and salads.

“So, Scott... Tess... you never announced the sex of the baby,” Lydia said.

“It’s definitely a girl, Scott’s got girly sperm.” Stiles dodged the bun being thrown back at him by Scott.

Tess laughed. “Stiles guessed it.”

“Another girl?” his dad said. “Poor Scotty.”

“Poor Scott? It’ll be world war three when they’re teenagers and I’ll be the one they hate,” Tess said.

Everyone erupted into different conversations, the noise rising up into the night sky.

Stiles leaned back, watching the chaos for a moment. Derek squeezed his hand.

“This is your family,” Derek whispered.

“It’s yours too, sucker.”

The first year of his and Derek's relationship was hard. They almost didn't survive it. Derek had to learn how to be reliable, not picking up and leaving whenever he wanted. Stiles had to learn how to rely on someone else, open up and talk about their problems instead of just pushing them away. There were a lot of fights, plenty of days they went without talking, and times when Stiles wanted to give up. But they didn't. They grew together instead of apart. 

The two of them fixed up the ranch together. Made it into something that was a part of both of them. Over the years they settled into a routine that was fun and less predictable than Stiles thought a long-term relationship would be. No Olive Garden, but the odd night of passing out on the couch. He'd take it because their relationship was dependable and sometimes boring and frustrating and it was theirs. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The final chapter... thanks for reading!


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